Thats a howler!!
This is a discussion on One of my favorite cop jokes within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; A fellow bought a new Ferrari and was out on the interstate for a nice evening drive. The top was down, the breeze was blowing ...
A fellow bought a new Ferrari and was out on the interstate for a nice evening drive. The top was down, the breeze was blowing through what was left of his hair and he decided to open her up. As the needle jumped up to 80mph, suddenly he saw flashing red and blue lights behind him.
"There's no way they can catch me in a Ferrari," he thought to himself and opened her up further. The needle hit 90, 100, 120 ... Then the reality of the situation hit him. "What am I doing?" he thought and pulled over.
The cop came up to him, took his license without a word and examined the car. "It's been a long day, this is the end of my shift and you're the twenty fifth guy I've stopped since lunch. I don't feel like more paperwork, so if you can give me an excuse for your driving that I haven't heard before, you can go."
The guy thinks for a second and says, "Last week my wife ran off with a cop, and I was afraid you might be trying to give her back."
The officer replied, "Have a nice weekend."
"You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone." - Al Capone
The second amendment is the reset button of our Constitution.
Thats a howler!!
"I surrounded 'em"- Alvin York
"They're ain't many troubles that a man can't fix with seven hundred dollars and a thirty ought six"- Jeff Cooper
Love it! Won't show to my wife...
That wasn't the punch line I was expecting!
EOD - Initial success or total failure
seen it before but it is still a side splitter.
"The sword dose not cause the murder, and the maker of the sword dose not bear sin" Rabbi Solomon ben Isaac 11th century
Train and train hard, you might not get a second chance to make a first impression!
I vote for Monica Lewinsky's Ex-Boyfriend's Wife for President.....Not!
That's a good one!
"So this is how liberty dies. With thunderous applause."
- Senator Padmé Amidala, "Revenge of the Sith"
Heard before, and I still like it.