Paraprosdokian (You'll like these)

Paraprosdokian (You'll like these)

This is a discussion on Paraprosdokian (You'll like these) within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; A Paraprosdokian sentence consists of two parts where the first is a figure of speech and the second an intriguing variation of the first. They're ...

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Thread: Paraprosdokian (You'll like these)

  1. #1
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    Smile Paraprosdokian (You'll like these)

    A Paraprosdokian sentence consists of two parts where the first is a figure of speech and the second an intriguing variation of the first. They're used typically for humorous or dramatic effect.

    - Never argue with an idiot. He'll drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
    - Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
    - The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.
    - If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.
    - We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
    - Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
    - The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
    - How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
    - Dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand at the edge of a pool and throw fish.
    - I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
    - **** Women will never be equal to men till they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut and still think they're sexy.****
    - A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
    - You don't need a parachute to skydive, but you do need one to skydive again.
    - The voices in my head may be fake, but they have good ideas!
    - Hospitality is making your guests feel like they're at home, even if you wish they were.
    - I scream the same way whether I'm about to be eaten by a shark or seaweed touches my foot.
    - Some cause happiness wherever they go, others whenever they go.
    - There's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can't get away.
    - You're never too old to learn something stupid.
    WHEC724, Guest1, Stubborn and 7 others like this.
    CCW permit holder for Idaho, Utah, Pennsylvania, Maine and New Hampshire. I can carry in your country but not my own.


  2. #2
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    Those would make for some great signature lines. I might have to steal one if we unseat our POTUS in 2012.
    __________________________________
    'Clinging to my guns and religion

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    Oh I love these. Here are a few more:

    I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

    Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak

    War does not determine who is right - only who is left.

    To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.




  4. #4
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    Words of wisdom!
    Hiram25
    You can educate ignorance, you can't fix stupid
    Retired DE Trooper, SA XD40 SC, S&W 2" Airweight
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    Dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand at the edge of a pool and throw fish.
    Funny.
    It is surely true that you can lead a horse to water but you can't make them drink. Nor can you make them grateful for your efforts.

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    VIP Member Array JoJoGunn's Avatar
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    The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.
    I like this one!
    "A Smith & Wesson always beats 4 aces!"

    The Man Prayer. "Im a man, I can change, if I have to.....I guess!" ~ Red Green

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    There's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can't get away.
    Priceless
    "Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country,"
    --Mayor Marion Barry, Washington , DC .

  8. #8
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    I like these a lot!

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    I refuse to admit I saw myself in a few of those!!!
    Freedom doesn't come free. It is bought and paid for by the lives and blood of our men and women in uniform.

    USAF Retired
    NRA Life Member

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    Money cannot buy happiness but it sure as hell will finance the search.

    A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.

    If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me.

  11. #11
    Member Array IronMike's Avatar
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    I always cry during sex...I think its the Pepper Spray.
    It is pardonable to be defeated but never surprised.
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