Your Favourite Darwin Award Winning Story? - Page 2

Your Favourite Darwin Award Winning Story?

This is a discussion on Your Favourite Darwin Award Winning Story? within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Originally Posted by suntzu Isn't that going against the spirit of Darwinism? Self preservation!...

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  1. #16
    Distinguished Member Array ericb327's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by suntzu View Post
    Isn't that going against the spirit of Darwinism?
    Self preservation!
    For to win one hundred victories in one hundred battles is not the acme of skill. To subdue the enemy without fighting is the acme of skill. (Sun Tzu) The Art of War

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  2. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by JoeFriday View Post
    My favorite was the guy that strapped a rocket on his car without thinking through the burn time and length of the road. A turn in the road was flanked with a rock wall and the guy became a grease spot on the wall.
    Too bad it didn't happen.....................

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  3. #18
    VIP Member Array JoJoGunn's Avatar
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    My story doesn't really qualify for a Darwin award, the person has to make themselves less than room temperature to get that. There can be lots of Dawinisms if one watches the show "1,000 Ways to Die."

    Now for the story.


    PRINCETON, W.Va. (AP) - A
    man accidentally shot himself in the
    right foot while cleaning each of
    three handguns, police said.
    The ##-year old man was drink-
    ing beer Wednesday morning when
    he decided to clean his guns, accord-
    ing to a report filed by Mercer Coun-
    ty Sheriff Deputy I. R. Catron.
    His 32 caliber handgun went off,
    but it “didn’t hurt” so he finished
    cleaning the .32, then began cleaning
    his .380 caliber pistol, which also went
    off, said the report, which didn’t
    name the man. That bullet “stung a
    little, but not too bad.” Catron quoted
    the man as saying.
    The man finished cleaning the
    .380 and then pulled out his .357 cali-
    ber pistol, only to shoot himself a
    third time. The man finally called an
    ambulance. Catron said the man told
    him the .357 shot “really hurt because
    the bullet was a hollow point.

    And my addition to the last line of this would be that the man also had a "hollow point" inside his head where his brain should be. Too bad he didn't shoot himself there, the bullet would not have struck any vital organ.
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  4. #19
    Senior Member Array hdhnict's Avatar
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    My favorite involved a young man who went to ask his parents for money.
    When his mother refused to give him any, he loaded the chamber of the shotgun the father kept.
    After pleading with the father, the father went talk to the mother.
    They had an argument about the son.
    Meanwhile, the now dispondant son, went to the roof and jumped.
    As he fell past the window, the father pulled the trigger (on what he believed was an empty chamber).
    He shot in the direction the mother. Breaking a window and striking the falling son.
    Death was ruled a suicide.
    The pellets struck the son as he fell.
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  5. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by BigJon10125 View Post
    My fav is the guy who used a live round as a fuse and promptly "shot" himself.
    Everything was going fine, until Bubba shot himself in the peanuts.

  6. #21
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    Not sure if it was a Darwin, but it was on 1,000 Ways to Die.

    Remember the hunters? They didn't find anything to shoot so they played a game of baseball using pine cones and a shotgun as a bat.

    The DA (that's shot for Dumb a**) holds the shotgun by the barrel, swings, pine cone hits the trigger and his belly button blows out past his spine on it's way to splatter against the trees.
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  7. #22
    Senior Member Array Tzadik's Avatar
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    A flasher went into a 7-11 wearing nothing but an overcoat. He picks up a can of soup and a loaf of bread. As the clerk is ringing up the soup, he laid his man-parts on the counter. The clerk took the soup can and slammed it down upon them, thus preventing his genes from possibly polluting the gene pool. He was arrested at a near-by hospital.

    Absolutely my favorite one but I can't remember where I read it, but it was about 20 years or so ago.
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  8. #23
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    Lawyer showing off his new office in a high rise. Throws himself against window to show the shatterproof glass and promptly falls to his demise. True or not, 2 birds with one stone. Not only an idiot but a lawyer to boot

  9. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by Powpig2002 View Post
    Lawyer showing off his new office in a high rise. Throws himself against window to show the shatterproof glass and promptly falls to his demise. True or not, 2 birds with one stone. Not only an idiot but a lawyer to boot
    Here it is.....................

    1996 Darwin Award: Lawyer Aloft
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  10. #25
    Distinguished Member Array 5lima30ret's Avatar
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    One of my first robbery cases that I worked as a Detective many years ago involved a teenager on cocaine who decided to rob a GUN/ Pawnshop with a claw hammer and a kitchen knife! The teenager was DRT, after the owner who was a former Marine and retired Police Chief, shot and killed him after threatening the clerk. This stopped a spree of armed robberies that the teenager had committed. Another great one that I heard on the Johnboy & Billy Show was the thief who stole a motorcycle and ran out of gas. The thief then used his cigarette lighter to illuminate the darkened gas tank! There were definitely vapors still present!
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