Male vs Female At The Drive Through ATM!

Male vs Female At The Drive Through ATM!

This is a discussion on Male vs Female At The Drive Through ATM! within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; MALE V FEMALE AT THE ATM A new sign in the Bank reads: 'Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling ...

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Thread: Male vs Female At The Drive Through ATM!

  1. #1
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    Smile Male vs Female At The Drive Through ATM!

    MALE V FEMALE AT THE ATM

    A new sign in the Bank reads:

    'Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.

    Customers using this new facility are
    requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.

    After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE Procedures have been developed. Please follow the Appropriate steps for your gender.'
    *******************************
    MALE PROCEDURE:

    1... Drive up to the ATM.

    2. LOWER your car window.

    3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.

    4. Enter amount of cash required.

    5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.

    6. Raise window.

    7. Drive off..

    *******************************
    FEMALE PROCEDURE:

    (Unfortunately, most of this is true.!!)



    1. Drive up to ATM machine.

    2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.

    3. Put hand brake on, put the window down.

    4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.

    5. Tell person on mobile phone you will call them back and hang up.

    6. Attempt to insert card into machine.

    7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.

    8. Insert card.

    9. Re-insert card the right way.

    10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.

    11. Enter PIN ...

    12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.

    13. Enter amount of cash required.

    14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.

    15. Retrieve cash and receipt.

    16. Empty handbag again to locate purse and place cash inside.

    17. Write debit amount in cheque book and place receipt in back of it.

    18. Re-check makeup.

    19. Drive forward 2 feet.

    20. Reverse back to ATM machine.

    21. Retrieve card.

    22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card
    holder, and place card into the slot provided.

    23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.

    24. Restart stalled engine and drive off.

    25. Redial person on mobile phone.

    26. Drive for 2 to 3 kilometres.

    27. Release Hand Brake.
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  2. #2
    Member Array IronMike's Avatar
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    GB;we are Americans,whats a"kilometres"?
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  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by gunnybunny View Post
    male v female at the atm

    a new sign in the bank reads:

    'please note that this bank is installing new drive-through atm machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.

    Customers using this new facility are
    requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.

    After months of careful research, male & female procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender.'
    *******************************
    male procedure:

    1... Drive up to the atm.

    2. Lower your car window.

    3. Insert card into machine and enter pin.

    4. Enter amount of cash required.

    5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.

    6. Raise window.

    7. Drive off..

    *******************************
    female procedure:

    (unfortunately, most of this is true.!!)



    1. Drive up to atm machine.

    2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.

    3. Put hand brake on, put the window down.

    4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.

    5. Tell person on mobile phone you will call them back and hang up.

    6. Attempt to insert card into machine.

    7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.

    8. Insert card.

    9. Re-insert card the right way.

    10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your pin written on the inside back page.

    11. Enter pin ...

    12. Press cancel and re-enter correct pin.

    13. Enter amount of cash required.

    14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.

    15. Retrieve cash and receipt.

    16. Empty handbag again to locate purse and place cash inside.

    17. Write debit amount in cheque book and place receipt in back of it.

    18. Re-check makeup.

    19. Drive forward 2 feet.

    20. Reverse back to atm machine.

    21. Retrieve card.

    22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card
    holder, and place card into the slot provided.

    23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.

    24. Restart stalled engine and drive off.

    25. Redial person on mobile phone.

    26. Drive for 2 to 3 kilometres.

    27. Release hand brake.
    incoming take cover
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  4. #4
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    Shots fired!!

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    He He...Didn't see the procedures for GLBT, silly.

    (now I AM in trouble)
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  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by IronMike View Post
    GB;we are Americans,whats a"kilometres"?
    GunnyBunny is up in BC Canada, they do use them funny distances and funny spellings such as cheque book.
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  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by msgt/ret View Post
    GunnyBunny is up in BC Canada, they do use them funny distances and funny spellings such as cheque book.
    Now there's a man with a sense of HUMOUR!
    goldshellback likes this.
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  8. #8
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    Scary, but unfortunately, true!!!

    And yes, I am a woman.
    Maybe it is because I was raised by a MAN and in the Texas style.... I follow the "man" way of ATM withdrawal.
    I even pull out my card BEFORE I get up to the ATM!

    BUT... There are women who do this exact listed procedure every time I go to the ATM!!! Drives me crazy!!!
    Especially on a Friday when everyone wants to just deposit their checks and go home!

    Then there are those (men and women) who decided to do ALL their banking from the ATM. They will take 10 minutes to
    conduct all their deposits, withdrawals, transfers, and then run a balance on every stinkin' account!

    AARGH!!!!!


    (And we won't even got into ORIENTAL women drivers)
    All I can say is that it is not a stereotype if it is true!

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by IronMike View Post
    GB;we are Americans,whats a"kilometres"?
    It's about six tenths of a mile.
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