How do you make a tissue dance? - Page 2

How do you make a tissue dance?

This is a discussion on How do you make a tissue dance? within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Originally Posted by QKShooter OK I've told this one on DC before. A giraffe walks into a bar and sez.... Hey Everybody...The highballs are on ...

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  1. #16
    Distinguished Member Array Burns's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by QKShooter View Post
    OK I've told this one on DC before.


    A giraffe walks into a bar and sez.... Hey Everybody...The highballs are on me!
    Someone's really getting into this
    Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable- JFK


  2. #17
    VIP Member Array nedrgr21's Avatar
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    A fish swims into a concrete wall and says "dam"

    A baby seal walks into a club

  3. #18
    VIP Member Array Crowman's Avatar
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    Bill: What to hear a dirty joke?

    Fred: Sure do!!!!!

    Bill: 3 pigs fell in the mud.....
    "One of the greatest delusions in the world is the hope that the evils in this world are to be cured by legislation."
    --Thomas B. Reed, American Attorney

    Second Amendment -- Established December 15, 1791 and slowly eroded ever since What happened to "..... shall not be infringed."

  4. #19
    Member Array Reaperman357's Avatar
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    A woman decides she wants to have a baby even if it's with a total stranger so she gets naked and sits on her front porch waiting for the first man to come along.She yells at the first guy who passes by.
    hey you wanna have sex?
    He says yes and starts toward her she asks so what are we going to name the baby?
    He turns and walks away.Then she thinks okay I'll wait till after before I ask the next guy that.
    Next guy comes she says wanna have sex he says yes they go inside and have sex when they are done she's says so what do you want to name the baby he gets up goes the the bathroom takes off a condom ties it in a knot and flushes it then says Harry Houdini jr. If he gets outta this.
    msgt/ret likes this.
    "Death Overcomes All"
    "All it takes for Evil to triumph is for Good men to stand by and do nothing"

  5. #20
    VIP Member Array jbum's Avatar
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    Two peanuts were walking down the road one was "asalted".

  6. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sig35seven View Post
    How do you catch a unique animal? U nique up on it.
    How do you catch a tame animal?

    'Tame way - uneak up on it.
    Reaperman357 likes this.
    __________________________________
    'Clinging to my guns and religion

  7. #22
    Senior Member Array DMan's Avatar
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    I see a like button, but were is the "dislike" or more appropiatly the "roll my eyes" button.
    atctimmy and msgt/ret like this.
    "Gun Free Zones" is where only criminals carry guns.

  8. #23
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    A priest, a rabbi, and a duck all walk into a bar, the bartender says, "Hey, is this a joke?"
    The last Blood Moon Tetrad for this millennium starts in April 2014 and ends in September 2015...according to NASA.

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  9. #24
    Member Array IronMike's Avatar
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    Sorry,can't tell any of mine here.
    It is pardonable to be defeated but never surprised.
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  10. #25
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    This doctor says to his patient...

    "I've got really bad news for you...and then some worse news."

    Patient: What's the bad news?

    Doctor: I'm afraid that you've only got 24 Hours to live.

    Patient: OMG! What could be worse news than that???

    Doctor: I forgot to call you yesterday.
    atctimmy, RETSUPT99 and msgt/ret like this.
    Liberty Over Tyranny Μολὼν λαβέ

  11. #26
    Member Array l1a1's Avatar
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    Seems our local police department was broken into last night. The thieves took nothing but the toilet seats and even worse, now the police have nothing to go on.
    It's kind of like how some people have a sudden and insatiable desire to talk about vampires after the Twilight series became popular, except zombies are much less gay and more likely to exist one day

  12. #27
    VIP Member Array hogdaddy's Avatar
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    How do you datch a polar bear?

    You kick him in the Ice Hole ; )
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    IT'S OUR RIGHTS>THEY WANT TO WRONG
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  13. #28
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    How do you fix a broken pizza?


    Tomato paste.
    It is surely true that you can lead a horse to water but you can't make them drink. Nor can you make them grateful for your efforts.

  14. #29
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    What do you call a man with no arms or legs in a pool?

    Bob
    When you have to shoot, shoot. Don't talk.
    "Don't forget, incoming fire has the right of way."

  15. #30
    VIP Member Array hogdaddy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by msgt/ret View Post
    What do you call a man with no arms or legs in a pool?

    Bob
    What do you dall a man with no arms & legs and lays on the floor ??_____________ Mat
    A Native Floridian = RARE


    IT'S OUR RIGHTS>THEY WANT TO WRONG
    H/D

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