Ünited Stätes Toughens Image With Umlauts

Ünited Stätes Toughens Image With Umlauts

This is a discussion on Ünited Stätes Toughens Image With Umlauts within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Hope this hasn't been posted before, the search yielded no results. From www.theonion.com April 30, 1997 | Issue 31•16 WASHINGTON, DC—In a move designed to ...

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Thread: Ünited Stätes Toughens Image With Umlauts

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    Member Array ibex's Avatar
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    Ünited Stätes Toughens Image With Umlauts

    Hope this hasn't been posted before, the search yielded no results.

    From www.theonion.com April 30, 1997 | Issue 31•16

    WASHINGTON, DC—In a move designed to make the United States seem more "bad-assed and scary in a quasi-heavy-metal manner," Congress officially changed the nation's name to the Ünited Stätes of Ämerica Monday. "Much like Mötley Crüe and Motörhead, the Ünited Stätes is not to be messed with," said Sen. James Inhofe (R-OK). An upcoming redesign of the Ämerican flag will feature the new name in burnished silver wrought in a jagged, gothic font and bolted to a black background. A new national anthem is also in the works by composer Glenn Danzig, tentatively titled "Howl Of The She-Demon."
    "So this is how liberty dies. With thunderous applause."
    - Senator Padmé Amidala, "Revenge of the Sith"


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    The Onion is a satire webmag. They do a lot of crazy things.
    Pointed humor
    Armed & Dangerous...and Inconspicuous...

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    Greät stüff
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    The Onion is always on the cutting edge of satire...
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    Däng, that woüld be very cööl.

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    Darn, sounded good to me...

    Better than that stupid anthem in Spanish that's been going around like a winter cold.
    "I am a Soldier. I fight where I am told, and I win where I fight." GEN George S. Patton, Jr.

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