Silly wife and her groupon

This is a discussion on Silly wife and her groupon within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; I'll only say a bit, else I risk overstepping my bounds. In my opinion, men should be the leaders of their marriage. At the very ...

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  1. #16
    VIP Member Array paaiyan's Avatar
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    I'll only say a bit, else I risk overstepping my bounds. In my opinion, men should be the leaders of their marriage. At the very least, each should be equal to the other. I agree with R&G that some counseling is in order, but I will say that you need to put your foot down and leave it there.
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  3. #17
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    Wow, I'm working a 40h/week day job and running a side business and I don't have $800.00/month surplus. Historically, I lived beyond my means for quite a while and I'm paying for it now, but you can bet your bottom dollar I'd scrape up 2 bills for a shotgun that I want(arguably, "need").

    You and your wife need to talk about these things. Granted that it's probably due to your wife's frugality that you have a bit of surplus, she does need to concede a bit for fun and games now and then.

    BTW, what line of work are you in, if you don't mind me asking? Being unemployed sucks on so many levels. It makes it extremely difficult for anyone to have good attitude about anything. I would agree that this may be part of her reticence.
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  4. #18
    Distinguished Member Array Paymeister's Avatar
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    +1 on the counseling: finances have been a big problem here, too: short version is I screwed 'em up, and wife now has a rough time trusting me as I grow into the gig (growing up in one's 50s is rough).

    I work for a huge company doing payroll, and was tired of folks coming in to mooch $5 or $10 for gas money from me. So I wrote an eBook on how to get some cash: find it at Heroic Money. It's for sale for cheap, but PM me for a 'free' promo code. [Mods: please delete if this doesn't pass muster - I hope I'm not overstepping myself.]

    The short version is, "Quit yer whining, put on your big boy pants, and go mow some lawns." There's more to it, of course, but that's the gist. I include stuff for less-physically-capable folks like myself, too. I'm putting it into use now, and have made perhaps $700 this year working occasional weekends and evenings.

    Of course, my $700 never made it to gun purchases. Hm. Maybe I need counseling, too.

    -Paymeister

  5. #19
    New Member Array david_c's Avatar
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    Wow I think you might have married my ex-wife!

  6. #20
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    How about borrowing a 12 gauge from a friend?

  7. #21
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    Being frugal and watching what one spends is one thing, obsessing over it is another. Sounds to me like your wife has a problem stemming from how she grew up and the money situation in her family. She has allowed it to come into your relationship and I see some troubled days ahead. She needs to get a grip on it. I and some others would agree, she needs to talk to someone in thearapy. Her obsession is the recipie for a bad ending to a marriage.

    Hope that your situation can be resolved before it comes crashing to the ground.
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  8. #22
    Senior Member Array Spidey2011's Avatar
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    My brother's wife was the same way. Started out with little things, but eventually it got to the point that he's no longer allowed to leave the house except to work his 12 hours on the night shift. Then he comes home and watches the kids all day while his wife runs around town with her drug dealing friends or our POS, criminal, half brother.

    BUY THE GUN! Sounds like you deserve it.

  9. #23
    VIP Member Array nedrgr21's Avatar
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    If you eat there enough times, the gun will pay for itself.

  10. #24
    Member Array tricolordad's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nedrgr21 View Post
    If you eat there enough times, the gun will pay for itself.
    agreed. at a standoff about the shotty now. Bleh...

  11. #25
    Senior Member Array Spidey2011's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tricolordad View Post
    agreed. at a standoff about the shotty now. Bleh...
    Just remember, "It's easier to gain forgiveness than permission."

  12. #26
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    1) It's easyer to ask for forgiveness then for permission.
    2) Think about turning in your man card.

  13. #27
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    The shot gun is a short term problem. How you and your wife are handling finances and communicating is a longer term problem and will have a bigger impact on your family. I also recommend counseling. A lot of fianacial couselors would recommend that you and your wife budget a little bit of money that each you control individually. The amount would have to fit in your budget after all the necesities are covered, but you would not need permission from each other to spend your portion. You could save up your portion and buy a shotgun or spend it weekly on other things. This gives each spouse some autonomy and some flexibility. As long as the amounts stay within budget it should limit arguments as well. This especially important when one spouse earns more than the other.

    For what it's worth, I was a stay-at-home dad for 4 years.
    Last edited by phreddy; September 7th, 2012 at 11:10 AM. Reason: typo
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  14. #28
    Member Array tricolordad's Avatar
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    Success!! Just exercised my right to have a pair and filled out the ATF form at Wally World, told her my reasons...which are obvious. Admitted that Ive been shopping around for about 3 months and did it without selling anything. Shes still not happy about it, but i pointed out the ipad, nintendo ds, xbox360, laptop (bought for 300 dropped and sold for 25), new treadmill (even though we still have a good older model) and my willingness to sell my g4. i also promised to look for beanbag shotshells so she doesnt have to worry about killing an intruder when im gone.
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  15. #29
    Member Array tricolordad's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by luvmy40 View Post
    BTW, what line of work are you in, if you don't mind me asking? Being unemployed sucks on so many levels. It makes it extremely difficult for anyone to have good attitude about anything. I would agree that this may be part of her reticence.
    Ive been doing everything from machine tooling to lumberyard picking through temporary help agencies since thats the only way employers are hiring help around here, but after 3 months they let you go because a full time job and a higher rate of pay would go along with the hire. Ive been able to secure long term employement with a few agencies, but after a while they run out of "contracts" to send me to and get shown the door.

  16. #30
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    Glad you got it, I still believe counseling, or at least more communication with your sweetie are probably needed. Cheers! Congrats too!
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