man's best friend

This is a discussion on man's best friend within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; A real woman is a man's best friend. She will never stand him up and never let him down. She will reassure him when he ...

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Thread: man's best friend

  1. #1
    Member Array Dono's Avatar
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    man's best friend

    A real woman is a man's best friend. She will never stand him up and never let him down. She will reassure him when he feels insecure and comfort him after a bad day. She will inspire him to do things he never thought he could do; to live without fear and forget regret. She will enable him to express his deepest emotions and give in to his most intimate desires. She will make sure he always feels as though he's the most handsome man in the room and will enable him to be the most confident, sexy, seductive and invincible...

    No wait...Sorry.

    I'm thinking of Tequila. It's Tequila that does all that stuff.

    Never mind.

    Dono

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  3. #2
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    lol
    “You can sway a thousand men by appealing to their prejudices quicker than you can convince one man by logic.”

    ― Robert A. Heinlein,

  4. #3
    VIP Member Array ccw9mm's Avatar
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    A bit early in the day, Dono?
    Your best weapon is your brain. Don't leave home without it.
    Thoughts: Justifiable self defense (A.O.J.).
    Explain: How does disarming victims reduce the number of victims?
    Reason over Force: The Gun is Civilization (Marko Kloos).
    NRA, SAF, GOA, OFF, ACLDN.

  5. #4
    VIP Member Array boricua's Avatar
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    good one! LOL
    Duty, Honor, Country...MEDIC!!!
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  6. #5
    OD*
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    Woman is a man's best friend?

    Lock your wife and your dog in the trunk of your car, drive around for an hour, see which one is happy to see you when you open the trunk.
    "The pistol, learn it well, carry it always ..." ~ Jeff Cooper

    "Diligentia Vis Celeritas"

    "There is very little new, and the forgotten is constantly being rediscovered."
    ~ Tiger McKee

  7. #6
    VIP Member Array xXxplosive's Avatar
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    Was gonna ask...............Where is that woman?
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  8. #7
    VIP Member Array ccw9mm's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by OD* View Post
    Woman is a man's best friend?

    Lock your wife and your dog in the trunk of your car, drive around for an hour, see which one is happy to see you when you open the trunk.
    Quickest way to the dog house, to be sure. Grrrowfff!
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    Your best weapon is your brain. Don't leave home without it.
    Thoughts: Justifiable self defense (A.O.J.).
    Explain: How does disarming victims reduce the number of victims?
    Reason over Force: The Gun is Civilization (Marko Kloos).
    NRA, SAF, GOA, OFF, ACLDN.

  9. #8
    VIP Member Array Brad426's Avatar
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    That's awesome and I have already shamelessly plagiarized it.
    I have a very strict gun control policy: if there's a gun around, I want to be in control of it.
    Clint Eastwood

  10. #9
    OD*
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brad426 View Post
    That's awesome and I have already shamelessly plagiarized it.
    I plagiarized it too.
    "The pistol, learn it well, carry it always ..." ~ Jeff Cooper

    "Diligentia Vis Celeritas"

    "There is very little new, and the forgotten is constantly being rediscovered."
    ~ Tiger McKee

  11. #10
    VIP Member Array Hiram25's Avatar
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    Well, I showed this to my wife and she said it works both ways!
    Hiram25
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  12. #11
    Senior Member Array jblives2ride's Avatar
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    ah yes but what kind of tequilla? I choose Patroon silver
    I would rather live my life as if there is a God,
    And die to find out there isn't, than live my life
    As if there isn't, and die to find out there is.
    God Bless

  13. #12
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    I kept the dog.
    I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. --- Will Rogers ---
    Chief Justice John Roberts : "I don't see how you can read Heller and not take away from it the notion that the Second Amendment...was extremely important to the framers in their view of what liberty meant."

  14. #13
    Member Array FLArmadillo's Avatar
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    Stole it.
    As we used to teach in the spook business, carry a 25 if it makes you feel good, but do not ever load it. If you load it you may shoot it. If you shoot it you may hit somebody, and if you hit somebody - and he finds out about it - he may be very angry with you. -- Jeff Cooper

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    Member Array Glhadiator's Avatar
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    My first thought was 'dog', you meant to say dog. Then after reading all of it I realized you meant Tequila...with a dog by your side.

    Very funny. And since you stole it I won't feel bad stealing it from you.

    Serve my country, swear an oath to protect it, pay my taxes, fly old glory in the front yard, love and protect my family, honor the vets before me and help fellow americans in need.
    By definition my country now calls me a radical

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    Quote Originally Posted by OD* View Post
    I plagiarized it too.
    Me too. It's making the Friday rounds.
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