Dog Rules

This is a discussion on Dog Rules within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; My Great Pyrenees weighs 150lbs, and he usually sleeps in the master bedroom doorway. There are no midnight trips to the kitchen, because he is ...

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  1. #16
    VIP Member Array high pockets's Avatar
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    My Great Pyrenees weighs 150lbs, and he usually sleeps in the master bedroom doorway. There are no midnight trips to the kitchen, because he is too big to step over, and nudging him is like trying to move the wife's triple dresser.

    As big as he is, however, he doesn't even have to get on the bed to lick my face in the morning.

    He does love his cats, though. One time when I got up in the night, I saw one of the cats laying on top of him, asleep.
    "If you make something idiot proof, someone will make a better idiot."

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  3. #17
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    My boss used to have a rottie that tipped the scale at 210 lbs. He was so afraid of storms, he would go hide in the bathtub and pull the shower curtain closed with his mouth.

    He also slept in the bathtub in the summer enjoying the cool porcelain.
    -Bark'n
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  4. #18
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    My last dog would run to jump in the bed every night when she heard the Velcro rip on my watchband. She knew I always took it off just before going to bed. I sure miss that old dog.
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  5. #19
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    This thread brings back fond memories though it is sometimes difficult not to get misty eyed.

    Treasure the moments with the older dogs. They are gone in the blink of an eye.

  6. #20
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    Our Shepard gets to sleep on my daughter bed only and isn't allowed on furniture. She does have the whole house to roam though. My last dog a golden retriever would stay on the couch while we were gone and sneak off to the floor as we got home.
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  7. #21
    VIP Member Array Hiram25's Avatar
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    All true except for #10 at my house, and they usually work in just the order given.
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  8. #22
    VIP Member Array Crowman's Avatar
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    Rule #11 -- Dogs will assist during home invasions........

    "One of the greatest delusions in the world is the hope that the evils in this world are to be cured by legislation."
    --Thomas B. Reed, American Attorney

    Second Amendment -- Established December 15, 1791 and slowly eroded ever since What happened to "..... shall not be infringed."

  9. #23
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    My minpin has complete run of the house and goes where she pleases. Her watch says feed me at 6am and 6pm. She has trained the wife to do anything she wants but I have found out the dog is easy to train, as long as I ask her to do something she wants to do. She is a good watch dog and earns her keep that way. Any strange noise and she alerts me, that makes everything else ok. Her outside property is as far as she can see and if she sees someone out of place she lets us know by barking.

  10. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by rocky View Post
    My last dog a golden retriever would stay on the couch while we were gone and sneak off to the floor as we got home.
    We used to have a Standard Poodle that did exactly the same thing. She knew she wasn't supposed to be on the furniture but would sleep on the sofa when we were gone. We knew she had been because there was a warm spot and she looked very guilty when we'd come in the door. We never said anything to her though because she was so good and so sweet.

    Our Boston Terrier sleeps in bed right between us. He's the chaperon.
    It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.

  11. #25
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    Our household is at #2.
    The dogs are outside most days, all day until the temp drops to around 25 or so, then its in the house IF they want, but only in the laundry room which is the first stop in, from the garage.
    If/when we ever get a Great Pyr it may want to stay out all day all year.
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  12. #26
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    I had a 2 dog limit/rule... When you pet 1 you must pet all so I told my wife that until I grew a third arm, no 3rd dog... well that didn't quite last... we just rescued our 3rd Australian Cattle Dog... His younger adopted brother was 1/2 ACD and 1/2 Rat Terrier and we thought he was going to be "small" so my wife let him up on the couch... then he grew to the typical 40lbs and now all three think the couch is there's. Two of them here... photo taken yesterday... DPP_2482.JPG
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  13. #27
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    He has earned his right to have free roam of my home after protecting the family
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  14. #28
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    Dogs are angels. I have 4. Give yours a tummy rub from me.
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  15. #29
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    Another variation of "dog laws".



    DOG PROPERTY LAWS
    1. If I like it, it's mine.
    2. If it's in my mouth, it's mine.
    3. If I can take it from you, it's mine.
    4. If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
    5. If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.
    6. If I'm chewing something up, all the pieces are mine.
    7. If it just looks like mine, it's mine.
    8. If I saw it first, it's mine.
    9. If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically
    becomes mine.
    10. If it's broken, it's yours.
    LIFE LESSONS LEARNED FROM A DOG
    1. If you stare at someone long enough, eventually you'll get what you want.
    2. Don't go out without ID.
    3. Be direct with people; let them know exactly how you feel by piddling on
    their shoes.
    4. Be aware of when to hold your tongue, and when to use it.
    5. Leave room in your schedule for a good nap.
    6. Always give people a friendly greeting. A cold nose in the crotch is most
    effective.
    7. When you do something wrong, always take responsibility (as soon as
    you're dragged shamefully out from under the bed).
    8. If it's not wet and sloppy, it's not a real kiss.
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  16. #30
    Member Array iguanadon's Avatar
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    For those that haven't seen this site, and others like it... Quite hilarious.

    Dog Shame
    Raleigh... Where Barney comes to Party...

    Glock 27 for every day carry (LCP for deep conceal when necessary)... Glock 23's for the home.

    Call me Iggy. Only my mother calls me by my full given name.

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