This is a discussion on Southern confidence within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; President Barack Obama was in the Oval Office when his telephone rang."Hello, President Obama" a heavily accented southern voice said. "This is Jimmy Boy, down ...
Post By tacman605
Post By ccw9mm
Post By Mike1956
January 15th, 2013 12:42 PM
President Barack Obama was in the Oval Office when his telephone rang."Hello, President Obama" a heavily accented southern voice said. "This is Jimmy Boy, down here at Bump's Catfish Shack, in Vicksburg , and I am callin' to tell ya'll that we are officially declaring war on y'all!"
"Well Jimmy Boy," Barack replied, "This is indeed important news! How big is your army?"
"Right now," said Jimmy Boy, after a moments calculation "there is myself, my cousin Tom, my next-door-neighbor and brother Gerald, and the whole dart team from JD's Bait Shop. That makes eight or maybe nine depending if Bump can close the store.
Barack paused. "I must tell you Jimmy Boy that I have one million men in my army waiting to move on my command."
"Wow," said Jimmy Boy. "I'll have to call ya back!"
Sure enough, the next day, Jimmy Boy called again. "Mr. Obama, the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry equipment!"
"And what equipment would that be Jimmy Boy?" Barack asked.
"Well sir, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and my brother Mike's farm tractor."
President Obama sighed. "I must tell you Jimmy Boy, that I have 16,000 tanks and 14,000 armored personnel carriers. Also I've increased my army to one and a half million since we last spoke."
"Lord above", said Jimmy Boy, "I'll be getting back to ya."
Sure enough, Jimmy Boy called again the next day. "President Obama! I am sorry to have to tell you that we have had to call off this here war."
"I'm sorry to hear that" said Barack. "Why the sudden change of heart?"
Well, sir," said Jimmy Boy, "we've all sat ourselves down and had a long chat over sweet tea, catfish, greens and pie and come to realize that there's just no way we can feed that many prisoners."
SOUTHERN CONFIDENCE CANNOT BE SHAKEN
"A first rate man with a third rate gun is far better than the other way around". The gun is a tool, you are the craftsman that makes it work. There are those who say "if I had to do it, I could" yet they never go out and train to do it. Don't let stupid be your mindset. Harryball 2013
January 15th, 2013 12:56 PM
January 15th, 2013 01:47 PM
HAH! Ya'gotta love us Southerners
January 15th, 2013 01:50 PM
that is the truth!!!!!!!!
January 15th, 2013 01:53 PM
Fightin' words, without a doubt: "We're shuttin' down the Catfish Shack and the Bait Shop."
Your best weapon is your brain. Don't leave home without it.
self defense (A.O.J.).
How does disarming
the number of victims?
Reason over Force: The Gun is Civilization (Marko Kloos)
NRA, SAF, GOA, OFF, ACLDN.
January 15th, 2013 01:54 PM
Doesn't get more serious than that!
Originally Posted by ccw9mm
January 15th, 2013 02:03 PM
Turn the election's in 2014 to a "2A Revolution". It will serve as a 1994 refresher not to "infringe" on our Second Amendment. We know who they are now.........SEND 'EM HOME. Our success in this will be proportional to how hard we work to make it happen.
January 15th, 2013 06:47 PM
Very good, I got quite a chuckle out of that.
January 15th, 2013 07:27 PM
Always heard "The South is gonna rise again".
January 15th, 2013 07:32 PM
And then, there are Tennessee, and Texas. davy crockett and santa anna - YouTube
"If I had my choice I would kill every reporter in the world, but I am sure we would be getting reports from Hell before breakfast."
William T. Sherman