So........What The Heck Is This ..?

This is a discussion on So........What The Heck Is This ..? within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; WASHINGTON, DC – A senior U.S. general has confirmed that the military has secretly drawn up plans to round up large numbers of privately-owned firearms ...

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Thread: So........What The Heck Is This ..?

  1. #1
    VIP Member Array xXxplosive's Avatar
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    So........What The Heck Is This ..?

    WASHINGTON, DC – A senior U.S. general has confirmed that the military has secretly drawn up plans to round up large numbers of privately-owned firearms from American gun owners.

    General James M. Scott of the U.S. Air Force confirmed that the Pentagon received a series of formal directives from the White House between November 7 and December 13 to begin plans for a massive nationwide operation to confiscate guns using a series of federal databases compiled over the last few decades.

    General Scott spoke with Duffel Blog reporters in a parking garage in northern Virginia.

    Scott also confirmed that a certain four-star general who heads the U.S. Transportation Command was intimately involved in the planning. General Scott would not reveal the general’s name out of concerns for his safety.


    The plan, known in the military as Operation PREAKNESS, combines a series of tactics developed for house sweeps and room clearing in Iraq and Afghanistan, which General Scott admitted had been used as test-runs for the U.S.

    “If we can confiscate millions of firearms in a country where we don’t speak the language or understand the culture, the U.S. should be easy,” General Scott told The Duffel Blog. “I just feel sorry for that poor Osama fellow we had to kill to justify the whole thing.”


    In a dress rehearsal for America, these three Iraqi men have their Second Amendment rights violated
    According to Scott, the actual planning for Operation PREAKNESS was initiated in early 2009 and developed in conjunction with the United Nations, Senator Dianne Feinstein, and several other liberal organizations such as the National Organization for Women, Planned Parenthood, Greenpeace, the American Federation of Labor, and the National Rifle Association, which is apparently a front for all the previous groups.

    While there was initially some concern about the constitutionality of using the military on American soil, page 2131 of the ObamaCare Act actually amends the Posse Comitatus law to allow the military to disarm private citizens at the direction of the Secretary of Homeland Security. Objections by then-CIA Director David Petraeus were quietly silenced in November.

    A test-run for PREAKNESS was actually conducted in early December in Clinger, PA. A joint platoon of Army Rangers and UN Peacekeepers, working with select state and local officials and using imagery collected by the Google Street View Car, quietly went door-to-door and managed to collect all the firearms from Clinger owners.

    The few owners who did complain were initially transported to Fort Leavenworth in Kansas to explain their case before a special international tribunal, before being sent to the National Center For Gun Control in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba.

    A follow-on operation using just the UN Peacekeepers is planned later this week for any owners missed in the previous sweep, although the Peacekeepers have confirmed they will be using a post office truck to infiltrate the area.

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  3. #2
    VIP Member Array Brad426's Avatar
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    IBTL
    I have a very strict gun control policy: if there's a gun around, I want to be in control of it.
    Clint Eastwood

  4. #3
    VIP Member Array xXxplosive's Avatar
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    Hmmmmmm...............

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    Senior Member Array Hoplyte's Avatar
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    Sorry for being dense, but what does IBTL mean?

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    Re: So........What The Heck Is This ..?

    In Before The Lock down of a thread.

    This is a hoax, it's in the humor section... It might not get locked...

    I give it a 3, Dick. The beat's a little weird, and it's hard to dance to.
    atctimmy likes this.
    It could be worse.
    "The History of our Revolution will be one continued Lye from one end to the other."
    John Adams
    "A gun is kind of like a parachute. If you need one and don't have one, you'll probably never need one again".

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    VIP Member Array Ghost1958's Avatar
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    IBTL? I Bet The Lasagna ?? There some source for this???

    edit before this gets locked. In todays world with this President that aint funny
    " It is sad governments are chief'ed by the double tongues." quote Ten Bears Movie Outlaw Josie Wales

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    VIP Member Array suntzu's Avatar
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    Anybody ever see "Seven Days In May"? Recognize the names? i surely hope no one seriously beleives this. We already have a bunch of folks beleiveing the Feinstein / Boxer hoax about asking folks to turn in their weapons.
    atctimmy and Darrow75 like this.
    Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?”
    And I said, “Here am I. Send me!”

    Isaiah 6:8

  9. #8
    VIP Member Array Ghost1958's Avatar
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    It aint wise to be pokin Rottwiellers that are already growling with a stick ya know
    " It is sad governments are chief'ed by the double tongues." quote Ten Bears Movie Outlaw Josie Wales

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    Member Array revldm's Avatar
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    Humor? I do not find it funny. I find it scary.

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    Member Array ssmith3007's Avatar
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    Bring it. No one is going to take my guns away from me.

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    This has been posted before, and I'll point out the obvious error: a general in charge of "transportion command" would not be tasked to put together a plan for a ground action. That would be like a general in charge of infantry being asked to plan the strategic bombing of another country. A 4-star Army or Marine general being tasked would be realistic.
    Retired USAF E-8. Remember: You're being watched!
    Paranoia strikes deep, into your heart it will creep. It starts when you're always afraid... "For What It's Worth" Buffalo Springfield

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    Senior Member Array Bubbiesdad's Avatar
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    IBTL



    Always remember that others may hate you but those who hate you don't win unless you hate them. And then you destroy yourself.
    Richard M Nixon
    Owning a handgun doesn't make you armed any more than owning a guitar makes you a musician.”
    Jeff Cooper

  14. #13
    Senior Member Array Hoplyte's Avatar
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    Thank you for the explanation folks. Internet acronyms and I are like oil and water.

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    VIP Member Array suntzu's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by revldm View Post
    Humor? I do not find it funny. I find it scary.
    Kill joy
    Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?”
    And I said, “Here am I. Send me!”

    Isaiah 6:8

  16. #15
    Ex Member Array gregnsc's Avatar
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    I may be wrong,but,i believe there is as much truth to this thread as me saying i'm going to wake up in the morning with wings.

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