What Customer Service!

This is a discussion on What Customer Service! within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Chances to gig someone this bad don't come along often. Here's a letter I'm sending out Monday (with an enclosure!) to, well, we'll call them ...

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Thread: What Customer Service!

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    What Customer Service!

    Chances to gig someone this bad don't come along often. Here's a letter I'm sending out Monday (with an enclosure!) to, well, we'll call them "ABC Camera Shop." Enjoy!


    October 29, 2006

    Dear ABC Camera Shop:

    What can I say. I am simply overwhelmed with the level of customer service provided by your employees.

    Awhile ago, I left my Nikon camera with your Eastchase Office for repair. I am very happy with the repair work – you all did a wonderful job, well worth the $160 you charged me. Also, I want to apologize for having left it there so long. Your employees diligently called me to let me know it was ready, but I just didn’t make it by for months. They were so gracious though – after notifying me that the camera was ready, they never bothered me again about it, even though it took months for me to come get it.

    When I finally did pick up the repaired camera, I didn’t have time to test it, so I just stuck it on a shelf, and it remained there for months. I needed it today, though, so I finally pulled it out, took a photo, and then plugged the memory card into my PC to copy the photo. Imagine the heartfelt pleasure I experienced when I found the memory card full of photographs showing that your employees had taken my camera out of your store and tested it on vacation! And to the tune of over 100 photos!

    As a businessman, I realize how rare it is to find employees who do not consider themselves “9-5ers” – employees who take their work home with them (which certainly seems to have happened in this case, now doesn’t it!)

    From the order of the photos on the memory chip, it appears your employees really gave the camera a through shakedown in widely varying climates and light conditions across our wonderful nation. It appears that they attended a graduation somewhere and tested my camera out on group shots in daylight, nighty-night shots in the bedroom, on an absolutely adorable puppy dog, and of course, on the obligatory “my-boyfriend-my-puppy-and-me” shot.

    Then, it looks like they took it on another trip to what I appears to be New York City (although the cleanliness of the subway in shot number DSC2623 looks is surprising for the NYC transit system, don’t you think?) The camera certainly worked well the first night in New York, didn’t it?! Check out the beer the girl is chugging in photo number DSCN2478 – you can really see the earthy tones of the elixir and hear the crowd changing, “Jets! Jets! Jets!” Oh, to be young again! And she seems to have been on a roll - the same girl is knocking back a few more in items DCSN2491, etc! Thankfully, she must not have gotten too sloshed, since she (and apparently my camera too) made the Jets game the next day and, as is evidenced by the next few photos, the post-game parties that night!

    Now shot number DSCN2628 really raised my eyebrows! Is that the Beastie Boys? WOW! Your employees have some high-powered contacts in The Big Apple!

    I was especially impressed with how well the next set of shots, which show the Manhattan skyline from a harbor tour boat, turned out. Pretty thorough of your employee to be sure that my newly repaired camera would stand up to salt-water conditions, don’t you think? It seems to have survived, though, as evidenced by that night’s concert photos. Ol’ Rod Stewart and the Rockettes are still looking good, aren’t they?

    And I can only imagine how much fun the employee who tested out my camera must be. I have seen some gals with personality before, but take a look at photo DSCN2576! It’s hard enough to find a chick that will tolerate one guy grabbing her boobs, let alone two! And all that with such a sweet “it’s-all-in-fun” smile! What a gal!!! I’ll be she’s a hoot around the office!

    The Christmas party that night (starts with DSCN2688) looked like a ROLL, dude! I just love to see white guys trying to do gang signs – it really speaks well of their cultural empathy. And what a sweet girl, to go to a beer party with ten guys just to make sure they didn’t get into too much trouble.

    And if warm days, cool night and the salt air of New York Harbor weren’t a good enough test, she even tried out my camera in the SNOW – AND WHILE IT WAS SNOWING – ON MY CAMERA! (DSCN2760, etc.)

    That only covers half of the photos; the rest are similar, although there’s also a little karaoke, a few GREAT Quick-Time videos from the bars, a Net’s vs. Lakers game, and gosh, that same ADORABLE little puppy again. But no need to go further – I’m sure you already know how much I appreciate your employee’s decision to test out my camera without bothering me for permission.

    Finally, I want you to know how especially humbled I am that someone with enough money to hire all the limos shown in the photos would go to such effort to take my camera instead of her own on her trips. Surely someone with that sort of dough has her own camera, and so I just find it especially thoughtful that she’d take my little ol’ cheapo camera with her to make sure it worked properly.

    Since your employees made such an extra effort to function test my camera, I thought you would like to have a record of their tests for their employee files. Also, I am sure they would also like to have a record of their diligence, so I have burned all the photos to the attached CD.

    Thank you again for going so far above the call of duty. After all, a nationwide function test is a heck of a lot of service for the $160 I paid you. I can promise you that I will tell everyone who will listen of what you have done for me … and my little ol’ Nikon.


    Yours truly,

    Jon
    "You may not know it, but there's things that gnaw at a man worse than dyin'."

    Charles Travis Postlewaite, 1882

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    VIP Member Array artz's Avatar
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    LOL !....... Busted !!!

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    That is unreal! You have to keep us updated as to what happens with this one.


    Ti.
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    Just once in awhile - just ONCE ... in a while, I do soooooo enjoy stuff like this!
    "You may not know it, but there's things that gnaw at a man worse than dyin'."

    Charles Travis Postlewaite, 1882

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    Jon, your camera has travelled more than you have. And since you couldn't make it to all those places the camera came back with photos of all the things you missed.

    Let us in on the response. I want to know what they have to say.
    George

    Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe. Albert Einstein

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    Hi, George. Frankly, I don't expect a response at all. I'm just having fun with this. I am laughing as I type.

    Jon
    "You may not know it, but there's things that gnaw at a man worse than dyin'."

    Charles Travis Postlewaite, 1882

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    That sounds like something I would have written. Excellent work, Jon. That was very nice of the employees, too, wasn't it?
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    Jon - that is wonderful - you have a great sense of reportage and sarco/humor LOL! Sounds like a very long tale of woe tho.

    Well - so we here are not disappointed, let's hope you get some response - you must of course post that.

    I wonder if they will ID staff in various pics - either some heads might roll or if the CEO is in on it - nothing will happen. Best of luck.
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    Your camera may have become the Gnome of the digital world!

    Got to love it!
    Rick

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    well at least ya know it works

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    What are the chances that your memory card was switched???
    www.ubgholsters.com short wait times. Use 'defensivecarry' as a coupon code for a discount to your order.

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    Quote Originally Posted by P95Carry View Post
    I wonder if they will ID staff in various pics.
    Oh, heck, I can ID the employee! It's the very youngish (mayby 20?) gal who took the camera in for repair! LOL! I am SURE she will be most excited to learn that her "My-Buds-Grab-My-Boobs" shot is floating around (not to worry - it was all in fun it appears, just kids, and all fully clad.)


    Quote Originally Posted by Bud White View Post
    well at least ya know it works
    Precisely. That's the point. The rest is just as I said, to have fun with such a rare, rare open door. Sheesh, I'm still chuckling about it.

    Best,
    Jon
    "You may not know it, but there's things that gnaw at a man worse than dyin'."

    Charles Travis Postlewaite, 1882

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    Quote Originally Posted by jarhead79 View Post
    What are the chances that your memory card was switched???
    It is their card for a fact, jarhead. I remember having removed mine before I took it in. So, it may just be that they stuck the card in to test it and then forgot to remove it, or they may have actually used the camera, I don't know. If they just used a card that was lying around (which I seriously doubt), then still no one will get canned, and that allows me to have fun with this.
    "You may not know it, but there's things that gnaw at a man worse than dyin'."

    Charles Travis Postlewaite, 1882

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    Quote Originally Posted by BigJon View Post
    Now shot number DSCN2628 really raised my eyebrows! Is that the Beastie Boys? WOW! Your employees have some high-powered contacts in The Big Apple!

    * * * * * * *


    And I can only imagine how much fun the employee who tested out my camera must be. I have seen some gals with personality before, but take a look at photo DSCN2576! It’s hard enough to find a chick that will tolerate one guy grabbing her boobs, let alone two! And all that with such a sweet “it’s-all-in-fun” smile! What a gal!!! I’ll be she’s a hoot around the office!

    What the heck. Here ... for your continuing amusement!
    Attached Images
    "You may not know it, but there's things that gnaw at a man worse than dyin'."

    Charles Travis Postlewaite, 1882

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    Member Array jamz's Avatar
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    You are summarily fired from combat carry and the internet in general if you don't go public (via a proxy) with these pics. PM me if you need a hosting source. Opportunities like this become internet legend!

    They are, after all, your property.



    Although I was dissapointed not to read the words, "I always thought they banned cameras at adult clubs!"

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