Chuck Norris reads his own facts

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Thread: Chuck Norris reads his own facts

  1. #1
    VIP Member Array 357and40's Avatar
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    Chuck Norris reads his own facts

    "I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched c-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain."
    - Roy Batty

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  3. #2
    Distinguished Member Array Nmuskier's Avatar
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    The dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.
    Chuck Norris counted to infinity...twice.
    Chuck Norris was once bitten by a rattle snake, and after three painful days, the snake died.
    Last edited by Nmuskier; July 19th, 2013 at 09:24 AM.

  4. #3
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    Good stuff
    Member of the NRA
    {A}RMS discourage and keep the invader and plunderer in awe, and preserve order in the world as well as property...Horrid mischief would ensue were the law-abiding deprived of the use of them
    1775 Thomas Paine
    Not afraid to live & Not afraid to die .

  5. #4
    Distinguished Member Array kapnketel's Avatar
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    Reminds me of a thread about Sixto...
    I'd rather be lucky than good any day

    There's nothing that will change someone's moral outlook quicker than cash in large sums.

    Majority rule only works if you're also considering individual rights. Because you can't have five wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for supper.

  6. #5
    VIP Member Array pittypat21's Avatar
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    Every night before bed, The Boogeyman checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

    Chuck Norris checks his closet for SIXTO.
    "Be polite, be professional, but have a plan to kill everyone you meet."
    -General James Mattis, USMC

  7. #6
    Distinguished Member Array Hodad's Avatar
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    Chuck Norris doesn't have to read his own facts. The words are automatically frightened into audio mode when he looks at them.
    357and40 likes this.
    "Life is tough but it's really tough if you are stupid"

  8. #7
    VIP Member Array Badey's Avatar
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    Before they met Chuck Norris, "The Black Eyed Peas" were just "The Peas."
    Darrow75, 357and40 and lionround like this.
    "My problem with life is not that it is rational nor that it is irrational, but that it is almost rational." - G.K. Chesterton

  9. #8
    Distinguished Member Array kapnketel's Avatar
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    Chuck Norris' beer opens itself.
    I'd rather be lucky than good any day

    There's nothing that will change someone's moral outlook quicker than cash in large sums.

    Majority rule only works if you're also considering individual rights. Because you can't have five wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for supper.

  10. #9
    Senior Member Array Bubbiesdad's Avatar
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    357and40 likes this.
    Always remember that others may hate you but those who hate you don't win unless you hate them. And then you destroy yourself.
    Richard M Nixon
    Owning a handgun doesn't make you armed any more than owning a guitar makes you a musician.”
    Jeff Cooper

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