Here come the Zombies!!! Kinda

This is a discussion on Here come the Zombies!!! Kinda within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; "Attack of the Zombie Chickens" http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,234538,00.html After all the talk of plinkin zombies with our SHTF rifles, I just couldn't pass up on this headline. ...

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Thread: Here come the Zombies!!! Kinda

  1. #1
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    Array buckeye .45's Avatar
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    Exclamation Here come the Zombies!!! Kinda

    "Attack of the Zombie Chickens"

    http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,234538,00.html

    After all the talk of plinkin zombies with our SHTF rifles, I just couldn't pass up on this headline. Prolly not the zombies we are all expecting, but what the heck.
    Fortes Fortuna Juvat

    Former, USMC 0311, OIF/OEF vet
    NRA Pistol/Rifle/Shotgun/Reloading Instructor, RSO, Ohio CHL Instructor

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  3. #2
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    That almost sounds like fun... break out the .22's

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    VIP Member Array raevan's Avatar
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    When I Worked on a chicken farm we just poped the heads off the culls, didn't bother with suffocating them.

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    Well yeah Raevan, but thats not very humane, but then again chickens aren't humans, so I don't see why humane matters. Appearances are everything when it comes to how humane something is. Sixto, skip the .22's I'd want to test out my Mossberg 500's zombie blasting capabilities.
    Fortes Fortuna Juvat

    Former, USMC 0311, OIF/OEF vet
    NRA Pistol/Rifle/Shotgun/Reloading Instructor, RSO, Ohio CHL Instructor

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    Senior Member Array PapaScout's Avatar
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    Ok, I need serious professional mental help. Still trying to come up with the Twelve Days Of Christmas spoofs from yesterday's post.


    (sung to Here Comes Santa Claus)

    Here come the zombie chicks,
    Here come the zombie chicks,
    Right down Zombie Chick Lane.

    Watch them stagger,
    See us swagger,
    Shoot them with disdain!

    All these chickens,
    Easy pickins,
    Poultry that's undead.

    Line up your sights,
    Turn out their lights!
    Shoot them in the head. :)
    "If you so much as bunny hop I'll cut your heart out!" Billy Bob Thornton in The Last Real Cowboys

    "I carry a gun for the same reason that I carry health insurance and a cell phone - be prepared."

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    Quote Originally Posted by PapaScout View Post
    Ok, I need serious professional mental help. Still trying to come up with the Twelve Days Of Christmas spoofs from yesterday's post.


    (sung to Here Comes Santa Claus)

    Here come the zombie chicks,
    Here come the zombie chicks,
    Right down Zombie Chick Lane.

    Watch them stagger,
    See us swagger,
    Shoot them with disdain!

    All these chickens,
    Easy pickins,
    Poultry that's undead.

    Line up your sights,
    Turn out their lights!
    Shoot them in the head. :)
    LOL You do need help.........come up wirth some more

  8. #7
    Senior Member Array PapaScout's Avatar
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    Ok, this one's a stretch... sung to Santa Claus Is Coming To Town

    Oh, you'd better watch out
    You'd better not cry
    Turn the lights out
    I'm telling you why.

    Zombie Chicks are coming to town!

    They know when you are hiding
    They know when you're asleep
    They'll sneak up on you unawares
    Only warning is a peep!

    So, load up the guns
    Sit and wait
    Barricade the door
    And don't be late.

    Zombie Chicks are coming to town!
    "If you so much as bunny hop I'll cut your heart out!" Billy Bob Thornton in The Last Real Cowboys

    "I carry a gun for the same reason that I carry health insurance and a cell phone - be prepared."

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    You have to much time on your hands. My wife is going to ask me why I keep humming Christmas tunes and start laughing.

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    Senior Member Array razorblade's Avatar
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    This is exactly what I need to start my unholy undead army.

  11. #10
    Senior Member Array PapaScout's Avatar
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    Ok, last one. Gotta get some work done today.

    Chicken Zombies Stalking O'er The Land
    (Walking In A Winter Wonderland)

    Chickens chasing
    Undead cunning
    In the streets
    The sheep are running
    A horrible sight
    They're crying tonight
    Chicken Zombies Stalking o'er the land

    Gone away is the Chinese flu bird
    Here to stay is a new bird
    Something has gone wrong
    We won't live long
    Chicken Zombies Stalking o'er the land

    In the mountains we can build a compound
    Then stock it up with boullion and rice
    We'll hunker down and blow away the zombies
    Make chicken zombie soup - won't that be nice?

    (didn't need to change this next verse other than the last line) :)
    Later on
    We'll conspire
    As we dream by the fire
    To face unafraid
    The plans that we've made
    Chicken Zombies Stalking o'er the land

    In the streets we can see them coming
    Shot after shot we'll keep them from the town
    We'll have lots of fun with Zombie Chickens
    Set them up and we will knock them down

    When they come
    Ain't it chilling
    Defending Man from zombie killing
    We'll save the day
    the CombatCarry way
    Chicken Zombies Stalking o'er the land

    Chicken Zombies Stalking o'er the land
    Chicken Zombies Stalking o'er the land
    Last edited by PapaScout; December 6th, 2006 at 03:29 PM. Reason: Fixed a typo
    "If you so much as bunny hop I'll cut your heart out!" Billy Bob Thornton in The Last Real Cowboys

    "I carry a gun for the same reason that I carry health insurance and a cell phone - be prepared."

  12. #11
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    I had no idea that my discovery would inspire you so much PapaScout, glad I helped you find your calling, turning Christmas carols into Zombie Chicken tunes.
    Fortes Fortuna Juvat

    Former, USMC 0311, OIF/OEF vet
    NRA Pistol/Rifle/Shotgun/Reloading Instructor, RSO, Ohio CHL Instructor

  13. #12
    Senior Member Array PapaScout's Avatar
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    It's been more than an inspiration. I just quit my job and I'm taking this on the road. The PapaScout World Tour should be hitting Ohio around Christmas. You get in free and, yes, you can carry. :)

    Thank you, buckeye07. Thank you.
    "If you so much as bunny hop I'll cut your heart out!" Billy Bob Thornton in The Last Real Cowboys

    "I carry a gun for the same reason that I carry health insurance and a cell phone - be prepared."

  14. #13
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    ROFL! Well, make sure you get a bunch of zombie chickens for the aftershow entertainment, gotta test out all of our zombie blasters.
    Fortes Fortuna Juvat

    Former, USMC 0311, OIF/OEF vet
    NRA Pistol/Rifle/Shotgun/Reloading Instructor, RSO, Ohio CHL Instructor

  15. #14
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    IIRC, a couple of years ago a poultry house in CA got in major trouble for running live hens through a chipper to make compost out of them. They didn't complain of having any zombies.

    I raise chickens and while they are not my favorite creature, they should be treated appropriately. Somewhere between the chipper and being buried alive is the answer I'm sure. Hopefully it will surface on the zombie_chicks.com forum!

    Dave.

  16. #15
    Senior Member Array razorblade's Avatar
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    Hey PapaScout, are you looking for a good bassist to join you, or are you going to be the one-man chicken band?

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