Actuary Jokes

This is a discussion on Actuary Jokes within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; There aren't many actuary jokes, so here's the best ones I know: ************************************************** What's the difference between an American actuary and an Italian actuary? The ...

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Thread: Actuary Jokes

  1. #1
    Distinguished Member Array p8riot's Avatar
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    Actuary Jokes

    There aren't many actuary jokes, so here's the best ones I know:

    **************************************************

    What's the difference between an American actuary and an Italian actuary?

    The American can tell you how many people will die next year, the Italian will tell you their names.

    **************************************************

    An actuary and a farmer were traveling by train. When they passed a flock of sheep in a meadow, the actuary said, "There are 1,248 sheep out there."
    The farmer replied, "Amazing. By chance, I know the owner, and the figure is absolutely correct. How did you count them so quickly?"
    The actuary answered, "Easy, I just counted the number of legs and divided by four."
    "You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone." - Al Capone

    The second amendment is the reset button of our Constitution.

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    Funny stuff.
    eschew obfuscation

    The only thing that stops bad guys with guns is good guys with guns. SgtD

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    An extroverted actuary looks at your shoes while he speaks.....

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