So we were looking at Sleep Number mattresses...

So we were looking at Sleep Number mattresses...

This is a discussion on So we were looking at Sleep Number mattresses... within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; ...and my husband and I volunteered to find our "sleep number." He laid down on the test mattress, and the lady showed us a screen ...

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  1. #1
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    So we were looking at Sleep Number mattresses...

    ...and my husband and I volunteered to find our "sleep number." He laid down on the test mattress, and the lady showed us a screen where it showed all the pressure points on his body - red and yellows for high pressure, blue and greens for low, and she proceeded to press the button that adjusts the stiffness/softness of the mattress until the red/yellow pressure points were gone.

    And then it was my turn. So I laid down, and I looked at my pressure points on the screen. There was this noticeable yellow/red blotch on my lower right back, around the waist area.

    "You seem to have uneven pressure on your lower back, so I'm going to adjust the mattress like so..." she said.

    "Must be my scoliosis," I said.

    I slowly sank into the mattress as she adjusted it, and watched the S&W 640 slowly turn blue on the screen.
    "Americans have the will to resist because you have weapons. If you don't have a gun, freedom of speech has no power." - Yoshimi Ishikawa


  2. #2
    VIP Member Array artz's Avatar
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    LOL....what did she say to that ?
    " Refuse to be a victim, make sure there is a round chambered ! "

    Just call me a pessimistic optimist !

    U.S. Navy vet 1981-1992

  3. #3
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    I had to really sink into the mattress for that little red and yellow blob to disappear on the screen. She just said, "Yeah, I have scoliosis, too."

    Those were very nice mattresses... and expensive.
    "Americans have the will to resist because you have weapons. If you don't have a gun, freedom of speech has no power." - Yoshimi Ishikawa

  4. #4
    VIP Member Array Cupcake's Avatar
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    HA HA!

    I was up North working on tall deer fences for a blueberry farm. At some point my buddy came over to help (it is his parents' retirement business) and said "dude, you're printing."

    My tshirt had ridden up and the was tucked between my gun and myself. Might have been like that an hour or more. I was working on the street but traffic was light. :)
    Spend few minutes learning about my journey from Zero to Athlete in this mini documentary!
    Then check out my blog! www.BodyByMcDonalds.com

    Cupcake - 100 pound loser, adventurer, Ironman Triathlete.

  5. #5
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    what # are you? Oh, about a .45
    "In matters of style, swim with the current; in matters of principle, stand like a rock." Thomas Jefferson


    Nemo Me Impune Lacesset

  6. #6
    VIP Member Array rodc13's Avatar
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    That's another good answer when someone asks if you're carrying a gun -- "No, that's my scoliosis . . . "
    Cheers,
    Rod
    "We're paratroopers. We're supposed to be surrounded!" Dick Winters

  7. #7
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    Hey, my number is 45! (I carry 9mm though) But I did remove my gun before testing the mattress. Two years using it and very happy with it.
    You have to make the shot when fire is smoking, people are screaming, dogs are barking, kids are crying and sirens are coming.
    Randy Cain.

    Ego will kill you. Leave it at home.
    Signed: Me!

  8. #8
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    That's a great story. I didn't see it coming.
    eschew obfuscation

    The only thing that stops bad guys with guns is good guys with guns. SgtD

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Betty View Post
    I slowly sank into the mattress as she adjusted it, and watched the S&W 640 slowly turn blue on the screen.
    Almost "outed" by a mattress!! Who'd have thunk!
    Rick

    EOD - Initial success or total failure

  10. #10
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    Betty:

    If you're seriously shopping - the same mattress has been used by Nancy and I for quite awhile. We love it. I like firm (100%), while she likes less firm.

    At 50 + years of trying different mattresses, these (Select Comfort) are great. We've had them all at one time or another, from expensive inner-spring to cheap inner-spring, a "knock-off" of a Select Comfort, to Tempurpedic, to floors. Never had a water bed (my lower back said "Yuk").

    The Select Comfort gives me what I need for my lower back, while the dual control allows Nancy to have hers where she wants, to avoid the hip pain.

    <testimonial over.....>

    It's too funny their gauges picked up on your "scoliosis", although that is not a problem to tease about.......

  11. #11
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    From "Mr. Mom:"

    So, what'd you shoot him with, a .38?

    Yeah, .38, .39, whatever it takes...
    A man fires a rifle for many years, and he goes to war. And afterward he turns the rifle in at the armory, and he believes he's finished with the rifle. But no matter what else he might do with his hands - love a woman, build a house, change his son's diaper - his hands remember the rifle.

  12. #12
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    We have one.
    It's great.
    Yep, expensive. It's worth it though if you need one and my wife does. She has neck and shoulder problems.
    The "raise your head" and feet feature is nice.
    I'd pass on the vibrating massage and wave feature.

    One thing to keep in mind though.
    When you but one with the risk free - try it for 6 months free (or whatever) the "money back" return is for the mattress only and does not include the bed frame.
    Just a heads up on that because the deluxe frames are expensive but, they are from a different manufacturer.
    Really excellent quality but costly.
    Liberty Over Tyranny Μολὼν λαβέ

  13. #13
    Distinguished Member Array BIG E's Avatar
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    Great story!

    At least you didn't drop your's in the floor like I did.

    I would love to see a pic of that screen. Blue outline of a gun! HAHA
    Don't hit at all if it is honorably possible to avoid hitting; but never hit soft!

    -- Theodore Roosevelt --

  14. #14
    Member Array oilman's Avatar
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    I like mine. Number 60. Tilting option is good. Never use the massage or wave.

  15. #15
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    I use the wave all the time, but I don't have a Sleep Number bed. I have the full motion waterbed. I have been sleeping on a waterbed for over 35 years. Bought the first one in Monterey, CA in 1971 while at Ft. Ord. Every time I have to sleep on something else I realize again why I have a waterbed.
    George

    Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe. Albert Einstein

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