How To Install A Home Security System

This is a discussion on How To Install A Home Security System within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; 1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work boots. 2. Place them on your front porch, along ...

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Thread: How To Install A Home Security System

  1. #1
    Distinguished Member Array p8riot's Avatar
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    How To Install A Home Security System

    1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work boots.

    2. Place them on your front porch, along with several empty beer cans, a copy of Guns & Ammo magazine and several NRA magazines.

    3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazine.

    4. Leave a note on your door that reads:
    Hey Bubba, Big Jim, Duke and Slim, I went to the gun shop for more ammunition. Back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls -- they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up real bad. I don't think Killer took part in it but it was hard to tell from all the blood.
    PS - I locked all four of 'em in the house. Better wait outside.
    "You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone." - Al Capone

    The second amendment is the reset button of our Constitution.

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    VIP Member Array Redneck Repairs's Avatar
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    ROFLMAO The only problem with that is that its more true than a joke where i live .
    Make sure you get full value out of today , Do something worthwhile, because what you do today will cost you one day off the rest of your life .
    We only begin to understand folks after we stop and think .

    Criminals are looking for victims, not opponents.

  4. #3
    Ex Member Array Pete's Avatar
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    I have size 13s, my mother-in-law actually has a pair of my old work boots on her back porch for this very reason. She lives alone and my old boots make it look like she doesn't.

    I don't keep 'gun stuff' outside, nor would I recommend it, but once inside my garage/workshop any intruder is confronted with a selection of very accurately shot targets.

    At this point they will hear my dogs going crazy and coming towards them, see the targets... time for them to make a very important decision.

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    That's good. Reeeeeal good.
    eschew obfuscation

    The only thing that stops bad guys with guns is good guys with guns. SgtD

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    Distinguished Member Array 4my sons's Avatar
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    That's the best system I have ever heard of,
    "fundamental principle of American law that a government and its agents are under no general duty to provide public services, such as police protection, to any individual citizen." [Warren v. District of Columbia,(D.C. Ct. of Ap., 1981)]
    If I have to explain it, you wouldn't understand

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    As funny as it sounds, it would probably work...if the dirtbag(s) didn't live in the neighborhood...

    ret
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    VIP Member Array ELCruisr's Avatar
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    Just think of the cost savings!!!!
    If you stand up and be counted, from time to time you may get yourself knocked down. But remember this: A man flattened by an opponent can get up again. A man flattened by conformity stays down for good. ~ Thomas J. Watson, Jr.

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    Distinguished Member Array Bob The Great's Avatar
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    very nice.

    Some empty 12Ga. and .45 casings scattered around would complete the system.

  10. #9
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    funny.
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