AHHHH... A Gun Owners Worst Nightmare... Literally

This is a discussion on AHHHH... A Gun Owners Worst Nightmare... Literally within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; I have a Wilson Combat Professional being delivered to my shop for me TODAY. The FFL it shipped from called last Friday to confirm our ...

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Thread: AHHHH... A Gun Owners Worst Nightmare... Literally

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    AHHHH... A Gun Owners Worst Nightmare... Literally

    I have a Wilson Combat Professional being delivered to my shop for me TODAY. The FFL it shipped from called last Friday to confirm our FFL and promised to ship it ASAP. It didn't come on Saturday so I KNOW it's coming today.

    The anticipation has been killing me.

    Yesterday you couldn't tie me to the ground. I was like a kid the night before Christmas.

    Today is my day off but when the phone call comes that my gun is in, I hope there are no police officers patrolling the roads because I'm going to make a 20 minute trip into a 15.

    So, last night, when I went to bed, I could think of nothing but the excitement of the upcoming day. The phone call, rushing to the store, opening the box and seeing MY Wilson for the very first time. I'm amazed I got to sleep at all.

    But then, the DREAM came.

    I had a dream that I got the phone call saying the gun was in. JD and I rushed up to the store to pick it up and our office assistant (the one who would call me to tell me it was in) was standing there with a HUGE box in her hands, waiting for me. A couple colleagues had gathered around to watch the eager unwrapping of the much awaited Wilson and I was pleased to see that it was carefully wrapped in many layers of protective material to thwart against scratching and damage during transit.

    I pulled back the last piece of wrapping, and there it lay. But it wasn't a one-thousandth of what I was hoping for.

    Before me in the box was the most disgusting, pathetic looking gun I'd ever laid eyes on. And worse yet? It was spray-painted orange.

    The grip safety was completely covered with rust, so much so that flicking it would leave one with rust dust crumbling to the bottom of the box. The Slide was chopped short so that the barrel stuck out of the slide and was also crudely cut, but not flesh with the poorly cut slide.

    The orange spray paint was worn off in places and where it had worn off there was nothing but rust.

    JD picked the gun up out of the box and pulled back the slide, which resulted in spiders (I have mild arachnophobia) crawling out of the chamber.

    I was horrified.

    JD, being the gentle and caring husband that he is, tried to make me feel better by saying, "It's not so bad. Maybe with some work..."

    Everyone who had gathered around looked up at him with aghast and slightly disgusted looks on their faces.

    Our office assistant tried to shove it back in the box before the spiders got everywhere in the store.

    I woke up and breathed a HUGE sigh of relief that I actually woke up from that.

    I'm still just as eager to get the phone call about my gun, I just hope there is nothing orange in the box or any spiders.

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  3. #2
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    Did you have pizza watching a horror movie before going to bed last night? My wife gets the nastiest nightmares with that combination!
    Don't worry, I know you will get a gorgeous gun soon enough
    You have to make the shot when fire is smoking, people are screaming, dogs are barking, kids are crying and sirens are coming.
    Randy Cain.

    Ego will kill you. Leave it at home.
    Signed: Me!

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    VIP Member Array edr9x23super's Avatar
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    Don't be so hard yourself; You are going to recieve one of the finest firearms available to any human being, so rejoice. See the glass as half full.
    "Guard with jealous attention the public liberty. Suspect everyone who approaches that jewel. Unfortunately, nothing will preserve it but downright force. Whenever you give up that force, you are inevitably ruined". - Patrick Henry

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    VIP Member Array goldshellback's Avatar
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    Wonder what the true meaning behind that dream was?

    Ever had that or similar dream prior to Christmas? I'd wake up and breath a sigh of relief too.
    "Just getting a concealed carry permit means you haven't commited a crime yet. CCP holders commit crimes." Daniel Vice, senior attorney for the Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence, quoted on Fox & Friends, 8 Jul, 2008

    (Sometimes) "a fight avioded is a fight won." ... claude clay

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    Quote Originally Posted by limatunes View Post
    The grip safety was completely covered with rust, so much so that flicking it would leave one with rust dust crumbling to the bottom of the box.
    There is the problem...... You need to get a better grip!!

    (Sorry!)
    Rick

    EOD - Initial success or total failure

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    Quote Originally Posted by rstickle View Post
    There is the problem...... You need to get a better grip!!

    (Sorry!)
    ROFLMAO...

    Good one!

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    I have the feeling - we will (I hope) soon hear the good news that the gun is in Lima hands at last!!!

    It is akin to when as a kid we had to wait for Santa Or worse!
    Chris - P95
    NRA Certified Instructor & NRA Life Member.

    "To own a gun and assume that you are armed
    is like owning a piano and assuming that you are a musician!."


    http://www.rkba-2a.com/ - a portal for 2A links, articles and some videos.

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    Senior Member Array dunndw's Avatar
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    ...that's just...weird. Whatever you had for dinner last night...don't eat it again :-)

    Wilson Combat...what happened to your love affair with Nighthawks?
    "If I was an extremist, our founding fathers would all be extremists," he said. "Without them, we wouldn't have our independence. We'd be a disarmed British system of feudal subjectivity."

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    Quote Originally Posted by dunndw View Post
    Wilson Combat...what happened to your love affair with Nighthawks?
    This was just too good of a deal to pass up.. I'm going to be getting my Nighthawk someday, but in the mean time, I'm okay with going with a Wilson..lol

    That sounds so wrong, doesn't it?!?!

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    You have the strangest dreams.

    Heck most of the time I can't remember my dreams 30 seconds after I wake up
    “You can sway a thousand men by appealing to their prejudices quicker than you can convince one man by logic.”

    ― Robert A. Heinlein,

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    New Member Array d4xycrq's Avatar
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    Has UPS been there yet?

    ">>I pulled back the last piece of wrapping, and there it lay. But it wasn't a one-thousandth of what I was hoping for. Before me in the box was the most disgusting, pathetic looking...."

    Sounds like some of my eBay purchases!

    Lima, has the brown truck been yet?!

    Best regards,

    Ray Wilson

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    Distinguished Member Array AnimalKracker's Avatar
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    Lima, I think you are having some inner turmoil about getting the Wilson instead of the NightHawk. All the anticipation and excitement of a new pistol, and worrying if it will be as nice as you hope got to you a little. Or it could have been a said before a pizza before bed. --LOL -- Hope you enjoy the new pistol, and I'm sure it will do until you get the NightHawk.

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    NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! It still hasn't come in! ONE more night of torture!!!

    If I have any more crazy dreams I'm going to go crazy myself.

    This is agony. It's like Christmas that keeps on getting delayed.

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    Weird Thought...

    DefensiveCarry.com has two female moderators.

    LimaTunes with severe arachnophobia and Betty with 5 pet tarantulas.

    I'm certain your Wilson pistol will be fantastic.

  16. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by QKShooter View Post
    LimaTunes with severe arachnophobia and Betty with 5 pet tarantulas.
    She must have had a less traumatic childhood than I did..lol.

    When I was little my sister and I used to get put in the corner a lot for fighting. We also knew that while we were in the corner we were supposed to be quiet and not get up until told or else we'd get in even more trouble.

    My mother put me in the corner and while I was sitting there, contemplating what I had done wrong... again... a spider started crawling down the wall. At the bottom of the wall, where it met the floor, there was a web I assumed he was going to. This web wasn't big, but the spider was. It was big and just kept coming. Past the web and onto the floor. I was so scared it was going to crawl all over me and I wanted to run but I knew I'd get in trouble. Sure enough it kept coming and then JUMPED (I'm not kidding you, it jumped) onto me. Consequences be darned, I started SCREAMING my head off and running around like my pants were lit on fire. I was crying and finally my mother caught me before I could finish tearing my clothes off to get this spider off me.

    She told me that she wouldn't have been mad at me for telling her there was a spider in the corner, but tell that to a four year old who is more terrified of a spanking than anything.

    Then, when I was twelve, I decided it was time for me to get over my fear of spiders. My parents had bought me a microscope and I was looking at everything: dollar bills, hair, blood, leafs, cat whiskers.. everything.

    I decided if I really got to "KNOW" spiders, I would be less afraid of them.

    My brother helped me catch one and we put it under my microscope.

    The fear of spiders was instantly amplified 100 times the moment I looked through that eye-piece. I've never seen anything so ugly and terrifying in my entire life not to mentions so clear and magnified.

    I don't think I even touched my microscope after that.

    Yes, sir. I hate spiders. While I've watched in awe as they have made webs (with glass safely between them and me) and do like the movie Spiderman, I won't go near the little buggers.

    Anything with more than two eyes is just plain CREEPY (except for butterflies, they are pretty as long as you don't look at their "faces").

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