Why Men Don't Do Advice Columns

This is a discussion on Why Men Don't Do Advice Columns within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Dear Walter: I hope you can help me here. The other day I set off for work leaving my husband in the house watching theTV ...

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Thread: Why Men Don't Do Advice Columns

  1. #1
    VIP Member Array swiftyjuan's Avatar
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    Why Men Don't Do Advice Columns

    Dear Walter:

    I hope you can help me here.

    The other day I set off for work leaving my husband in the house watching theTV as usual. I hadn't gone more than a mile down theroad when my engine conked out and the car shudderedto a halt. I walked back home to get my husband's help.

    When I got home I couldn't believe my eyes. He was in the bedroom with a neighbor lady making mad passionate love to her. I am 32, my husband is 34 and we havebeen married for twelve years. When I confronted him, he tried to make out that he went into the back yard and heard a lady scream, had come to her rescue but found her unconscious. He'd carried the woman back to our house, laid her in bed, and began CPR.

    When she awoke she immediately began thanking him and kissing him and he was attempting to break free when I cameback. But when I asked him why neither of them had any clothes on, he broke down and admitted that he'd been having an affair for the past six months.

    I told him to stop or I would leave him. He was let go from his job six months ago and he says he has been feeling increasingly depressed and worthless. I love him very much, but ever since I gave him the ultimatum he has become increasingly distant. I don't feel I can get through to him anymore. Can you please help?
    Sincerely,

    Mrs. Sheila Usk

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


    Dear Sheila: A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by a variety of faults with the engine.Start by checking that there is no debris in the fuelline. If it is clear, check the jubilee clips holding the vacuum pipes onto the inlet manifold.

    If none of these approaches solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the carburetor float chamber.

    I hope this helps.

    Walter
    John
    Assault is a behavior, not a device.

    "Don't never take no shortcuts." Patty Reed, Donner Party

    Lifetime NRA member

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  3. #2
    VIP Member Array Bud White's Avatar
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    Ahh Too Funny

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    Bwhahaha - priceless (Even with the bad text spacing etc!)
    Chris - P95
    NRA Certified Instructor & NRA Life Member.

    "To own a gun and assume that you are armed
    is like owning a piano and assuming that you are a musician!."


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    Member Array phaed's Avatar
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    hehe, that was great
    War is not the ugliest of things. Worse is the decayed state of moral feeling which thinks nothing is worth a war. A man who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which he cares for more than his personal safety, is a miserable creature who has no chance of being free. -J.S. Mill

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    VIP Member Array swiftyjuan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by P95Carry View Post
    Bwhahaha - priceless (Even with the bad text spacing etc!)
    Hey Chris, I stole it fair and square. It was spaced nicely when I copied it. The pasting apparently compressed it slightly! I really need to learn more about these darn computers...
    John
    Assault is a behavior, not a device.

    "Don't never take no shortcuts." Patty Reed, Donner Party

    Lifetime NRA member

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    Tell ya what John - I'll go edit that and tidy it up
    Chris - P95
    NRA Certified Instructor & NRA Life Member.

    "To own a gun and assume that you are armed
    is like owning a piano and assuming that you are a musician!."


    http://www.rkba-2a.com/ - a portal for 2A links, articles and some videos.

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    I believe that this is on the site in another thread...
    But it's STILL funny!
    It's not about the caliber you carry, it's about how you USE it.

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    Senior Member Array jframe38's Avatar
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    Oh yes...tell him he should have applied for "unemployment benefits".

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    Okay.. that is pretty darned good! LOL.. I'd hate to be her. Sitting there. Waiting for the advice column to come out and reading that reply..lol.

    oh well. I guess advice columns are cheaper than marital counseling..lol

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    Funny...
    The last Blood Moon Tetrad for this millennium starts in April 2014 and ends in September 2015...according to NASA.

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    Member Array CarryingMarine's Avatar
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    +1

    Aint that the truth.
    "Some people spend an entire lifetime wondering if they made a difference, the MARINES don't have that problem." Pres. Ronald Reagan.

    Remember your abilities AND disabilities can become Possibilities!

    Semper Fi!

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    Ex Member Array ibez's Avatar
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    did she check to see if the vehicle was actually just out of gas ?

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    VIP Member Array ELCruisr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ibez View Post
    did she check to see if the vehicle was actually just out of gas ?
    It might be one of those pesky, in tank fuel pumps too. Maybe she could get her husband to do some checking?
    If you stand up and be counted, from time to time you may get yourself knocked down. But remember this: A man flattened by an opponent can get up again. A man flattened by conformity stays down for good. ~ Thomas J. Watson, Jr.

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    Senior Member Array Andy W.'s Avatar
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    What's everybody laughing about? It could very well be a fuel problem.
    America: Your government is not ignoring you, it's insulting you.

    The Bill of Rights: Void where prohibited by law.

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    interesting post.
    (SHERIFF BUFORD T. JUSTICE) "what the hell is
    the world coming too"

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