This is a discussion on tragic murder / suicide at work on Tuesday within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Back in 1983 my Grandfather took his own life after caring for my terminally ill Grandmother for the previous 5 years. They had been married ...
Back in 1983 my Grandfather took his own life after caring for my terminally ill Grandmother for the previous 5 years. They had been married for 52 years, and when I found him that day, I read the letter he left behind before my father arrived. At the time, I was devastated like the rest of my family was. It was only after living with and caring for my other Grandfather for the last 6 years of his life, did I come to understand what my Fathers' Father went through. At the end of his life, he had suffered a series of strokes over a course of about 6 months and ended up in the hospital the morning after the 1993 super bowl (go cowboys) where he passed away on valentines' day 2 weeks later. The hardest conversation I ever had with my grandfather was the last time he was lucid on February 11th in the morning; The previous week, he had turned over his power of attorney to my mother and my uncle her brother to handle his business affairs. My grandfather was an independent oilman who had made a fortune in the business, and during the conversation, he told me that he knew he was dying and that while things still made sense, he wanted me to understand that a hard choice may have to be made regarding his future care. He talked to me about "pulling the plug" if he were ever hooked up to any life support, because he did not want to live that way. I tried to talk him out of asking this of me, but he looked me in the eye and told me that real life was about hard choices, and that he asked this of me because he knew deep down inside he could not ask his own children to do this for him.
Soon after that conversation, we sat in silence & he became delirious and disoriented again, this time for good. I walked out of the room later on, and was shaken to the core, thinking about our conversation. The next couple of days I prayed that I would not have to make a choice like the one we talked about, because the doctors of course were talking about a nursing home and 24 hour care, which was difficult to swallow. Luckily, though, I guess my prayers were answered, and my Grandfather passed away in the morning in his sleep. having gone through that, in hindsight I can say that anyone who goes through this and thinks they are "taking the high road" by denying a person to pass away on their own terms with some dignity left is simply a fool. At the time of my Grandfather's passing, "living wills" had not yet become standard practice, so that was a very scary feeling, wondering if he was going to spend an extended period of time in managed care, or worse yet, hooked up to a machine for "life support".
After my experience, I think "assisted suicide" should be allowed in cases of terminally ill patients; after all, criminals are treated with far more dignity, they are just put to sleep when they have committed heinous crimes against humanity; why shouldn't terminally ill law abiding citizens be allowed the same easy passing?
Just my .02
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War is not the ugliest of things. Worse is the decayed state of moral feeling which thinks nothing is worth a war. A man who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which he cares for more than his personal safety, is a miserable creature who has no chance of being free. -J.S. Mill
With all of our current technology, I suppose we can keep people "alive" for just about as long as we want. I question what alive is and isnt. Is it a physical or mental statel? I say its mental.
I think a lot of times we fool with nature and suffer for it. As hard as it might be, I think we should allow nature to take its course in these types of cases.
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