I wonder why?

I wonder why?

This is a discussion on I wonder why? within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Have you even wondered . . . . . Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting ...

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Thread: I wonder why?

  1. #1
    DC Founder
    Array Bumper's Avatar
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    May 2004

    I wonder why?

    Have you even wondered . . . . .

    Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the
    batteries are getting weak?

    Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know
    there is not enough?

    Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion
    stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

    Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle it comes in?

    Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

    Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

    Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you
    throw a revolver at him?

    Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

    Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

    If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

    Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the
    bubbles are always white?

    Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

    Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes
    that something new to eat will have materialized?

    Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their
    vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it
    down to give the vacuum one more chance?

    Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end you first

    How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

    When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a
    shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all
    right?" Well, it isn't all right so why don't we say, "That hurt,
    you stupid idiot?"

    Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's
    falling off the table, you always manage to knock something else

    In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in
    summer when we complained about the heat?

    How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

    If at first you don't succeed, shouldn't you try doing it like
    your wife told you to do it?

    And my FAVORITE......

    The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons
    is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best
    friends. If they're okay, then it's you!!
    Coimhéad fearg fhear na foighde; Beware the anger of a patient man.

  2. #2
    VIP Member (Retired Staff) Array P95Carry's Avatar
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    Mar 2005
    South West PA
    Hahaha - some rather ''close-to-home'' items there Randy LOL
    Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle it comes in?
    But it does, to nozzle, - well, if'n it's superglue!
    Chris - P95
    NRA Certified Instructor & NRA Life Member.

    "To own a gun and assume that you are armed
    is like owning a piano and assuming that you are a musician!."

    http://www.rkba-2a.com/ - a portal for 2A links, articles and some videos.

  3. #3
    Member Array N.M. Edmands's Avatar
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    Dec 2004
    Yavapai County, Arizona
    Why do we drive on parkways and park in driveways?
    "I know you believe you understand what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant."

    "It aint how good you shoot, it's how cool you look doing it." [Fred Sayre 1994]

  4. #4
    Member Array scratchy wilson's Avatar
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    Dec 2004
    If your knees went the other way, what would a chair look like?

  5. #5
    1952 - 2006
    Array acparmed's Avatar
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    Jan 2005
    Las Vegas, Nevada
    Why do feet smell and noses run?
    Heroes are people who do what has to be done, when it has to be done, regardless of the consequences

    "I like when the enemy shoots at me; then I know where the ******** are and can kill them."
    ~George Patton


  6. #6
    Lead Moderator
    Array rstickle's Avatar
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    Dec 2004
    Laurel, MD
    Why do we speak louder to people who don't speak English?

    EOD - Initial success or total failure

  7. #7
    Array QKShooter's Avatar
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    Dec 2004
    Moderator Central

    Thumbs up Bumper...That Helped This Morning.

    Coffee & A Chuckle For Breakfast this morning.
    Maybe my day will go OK after all today.
    Liberty Over Tyranny Μολὼν λαβέ

  8. #8
    Lead Moderator
    Array Tangle's Avatar
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    Dec 2004
    Mental illness is inherited - parents get it from their kids.

    Who ever said there's no such thing as a stupid question, never taught school. (or has never been a LEO, etc.)

    My favorite stupid question is, "Are we going to be doing anything important in class tomorrow?" It doesn't matter what I say to that, the next thing I hear is, "Well I can't be there tomorrow."

  9. #9
    Senior Member Array older gunner's Avatar
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    Apr 2005
    Florida Panhandle
    I've often wondered why you put a pill in your stomach when you have a headache!

  10. #10
    VIP Member Array KenpoTex's Avatar
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    Jun 2005
    SW Missouri
    Quote Originally Posted by Tangle
    Who ever said there's no such thing as a stupid question, never taught school. (or has never been a LEO, etc.)
    There are no stupid questions...only stupid people who ask questions.
    "Being a predator isn't always comfortable but the only other option is to be prey. That is not an acceptable option." ~Phil Messina

    If you carry in Condition 3, you have two empty chambers. One in the weapon...the other between your ears.

    Matt K.

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