Funny joke from a friend of mine.

Funny joke from a friend of mine.

This is a discussion on Funny joke from a friend of mine. within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; The Commanding Officer was about to start the morning briefing to his Staff. While waiting for the coffee machine to finish its brewing, he decided ...

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Thread: Funny joke from a friend of mine.

  1. #1
    Member Array osanmike's Avatar
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    Funny joke from a friend of mine.

    The Commanding Officer was about to start the morning briefing to his Staff.
    While waiting for the coffee machine to finish its brewing, he decided to pose a question to all assembled.
    He explained that his wife had been bit frisky the night before and he failed to get his usual amount of sound sleep.
    He posed the question of just how much of sex was 'work' and how much of it was 'pleasure?'
    The Major chimed in with 75-25% in favor of work.
    A Captain said it was 50-50%.
    A MSgt, responded with 25-75% in favor of pleasure, depending on his state of inebriation at the time.
    There being no consensus, the Colonel turned to the Airmen who was making the coffee. What was HIS opinion?
    With no hesitiation, the young Airmen responded, "Sir, it has to be 100% pleasure."
    The Colonel was surprised and, as you might guess, asked why?
    "Well, Sir, began the Airmen, "if there was any work involved, the
    officers would have me doing it for them."
    The room fell silent.
    "No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the Congress is in session."
    Mark Twain
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    Ha!
    It is surely true that you can lead a horse to water but you can't make them drink. Nor can you make them grateful for your efforts.

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    VIP Member Array friesepferd's Avatar
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    Wo die Notwehr aufhört, fängt der Mord an
    (Murder begins where self-defense ends)
    Georg Büchner

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    VIP Member Array ExactlyMyPoint's Avatar
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    Preparing for the Zombie Apocalypse or Rapture....whichever comes first.

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    Distinguished Member Array SixBravo's Avatar
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    Hahaha YES!!
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    "It is enough to note, as we have observed, that the American people have considered the handgun to be the quintessential self-defense weapon." - Justice Scalia, SCOTUS - DC v Heller - 26 JUN 2008

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    88m
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    “The will to survive is not as important as the will to prevail... the answer to criminal aggression is retaliation.” Jeff Cooper

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    VIP Member Array BigEFan's Avatar
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    hehehehe. I know some non-members that I will be sharing this with.
    Lex et Libertas — Semper Vigilo, Fortis, Paratus, et Fidelis!

    "Not only do the people who put their lives on the line to protect the rest of us deserve better, we all deserve better than to have our own security undermined by those who undermine law enforcement." -Thomas Sowell

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    Senior Member Array MR D's Avatar
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    how true!!


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    VIP Member Array artz's Avatar
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    LOL...
    " Refuse to be a victim, make sure there is a round chambered ! "

    Just call me a pessimistic optimist !

    U.S. Navy vet 1981-1992

  10. #10
    Member Array PatP's Avatar
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    nice!

  11. #11
    Member Array wyo-man's Avatar
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    LOL

    wyo-man

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    Distinguished Member Array C9H13NO3's Avatar
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    ho-man thatwasagoodone...

    lol

  13. #13
    VIP Member Array PatrioticRick's Avatar
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    That one is being passed on
    Μολὼν λαβέ

    USN 78-82/USAF 82-93 Medically Retired
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    Then there was the general coming on post with his driver. The new MP asked to see both their ID's. The general was peeved and told his driver to move on. The MP again stated politely that general orders were to check every ID. Once again the general barked indignantly at the driver to move on. Finally, the MP said to the general, "Sir, I'm really new at this. Can you help me? Who do I shoot first, you or the driver?"

  15. #15
    Senior Member Array bobcat35's Avatar
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    very good jokes. might just use the first today during the usual bull session right before COB
    "Nothing in life is so exhilarating as to be shot at without result."
    -Winston Churchill
    Every well-bred petty crook knows: the small concealable weapons always go to the far left of the place setting.
    -Inara, firefly

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