Why a Handgun is Better Than a Woman

Why a Handgun is Better Than a Woman

This is a discussion on Why a Handgun is Better Than a Woman within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Why a Handgun is Better Than a Woman ________________________________________ 1.You can buy a silencer for a handgun. 2.You can trade a .44 for two .22's. ...

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Thread: Why a Handgun is Better Than a Woman

  1. #1
    Sponsor Array DCJS Instructor's Avatar
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    Why a Handgun is Better Than a Woman

    Why a Handgun is Better Than a Woman
    ________________________________________
    1.You can buy a silencer for a handgun.

    2.You can trade a .44 for two .22's.

    3.You can have a handgun at home and another for the road.

    4.If you admire a friend's handgun and tell him so, he will be impressed and let you try a few rounds with it.

    5.Your primary handgun doesn't mind if you have a backup.

    6.Your handgun will stay with you even if you are out of ammo.

    7.A handgun doesn't take up a lot of closet space.

    8.Handguns function normally every day of the month.

    9.A handgun won't ask, "Do these grips make me look fat?"

    10.A handgun does not mind if you go to sleep after you're done using it.

    11.You can have more than one handgun living in the same house without having problems.


    Tom Perroni


  2. #2
    Member Array Sporty79's Avatar
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    LOL, thats true.

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    Preparing for the Zombie Apocalypse or Rapture....whichever comes first.

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    And soon enough Lima will reprise the famous Why a Gun is Better than a Man list.
    You have to make the shot when fire is smoking, people are screaming, dogs are barking, kids are crying and sirens are coming.
    Randy Cain.

    Ego will kill you. Leave it at home.
    Signed: Me!

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    VIP Member Array semperfi.45's Avatar
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    That is funny.
    Training means learning the rules. Experience means learning the exceptions.

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    Senior Member Array Scot Van's Avatar
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    I'm (quietly) laughing at this, hoping my wife doesn't read it...

    A man in the hands of his enemies is flesh, and shudderingly vulnerable. - author unknown

  7. #7
    JD
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    Quote Originally Posted by Miggy View Post
    And soon enough Lima will reprise the famous Why a Gun is Better than a Man list.
    Lima's still getting ready to go to work, I managed to find the quote:

    Quote Originally Posted by Limatunes
    And women like guns because ...

    10# A gun doesn't complain when you take it shopping. Even to buy "personal" products.

    9# You can make a gun dress in whatever you think it will look best in and it doesn't complain about itching, scratching or that you're "not accepting it the way it is."

    8# A gun is specific on what it wants for dinner.

    7# A gun will always be there when you need it.

    6# Guns don't threaten to rip the arms off of other guns you look at.

    5# Guns don't go off by themselves or with other guns and decide to do REALLY STUPID stuff.

    4# You can take a gun to the gunsmith without it complaining that it's just "a flesh wound."

    3# A gun maintains the same shape and size no matter how much you feed it.

    2# Even if you let other girls handle your gun it will always come back to you (even if it takes a little effort to get it back).

    #1 A gun knows the perfect answer to all those tough questions we women ask: shut up and lay there until she needs you.

  8. #8
    VIP Member Array ExactlyMyPoint's Avatar
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    Here are a few more that weren't listed:

    More Reasons Why A Gun Is Better Than A Man

    A handgun does not need its ego stroked to properly perform

    When taken home, a handgun will not hog your remote or drink all the beer in your refrigerator

    A handgun has no problem receiving direction and generally shoots in the direction that it is aimed

    Pressure actually improves performance

    Regular use will not result in pregnancy

    Your gun fires whenever you want it to as many times as it takes to satisfy you.

    A handgun can be reloaded to perform again immediately after use
    Preparing for the Zombie Apocalypse or Rapture....whichever comes first.

  9. #9
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    I can put a handgun in a closet and it will stay there and be quite.
    "Just blame Sixto"

  10. #10
    Senior Member Array Scot Van's Avatar
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    Edited from exactlymypoint's post...

    More reasons why a gun is better than a man OR a woman

    A handgun does not need its ego stroked to properly perform. Neither does it need to be told it isn't fat.

    When taken home, a handgun will not hog your remote or drink all the beer in your refrigerator. Nor will it take all possible closet space for itself or fill the freezer with 'fat free' ice cream.

    A handgun has no problem receiving direction and generally shoots in the direction that it is aimed. Nor will it cry when criticized and tell it's friends that you're completely incapable of understanding what it is talking about

    Pressure actually improves performance as does cessation of nagging.

    Regular use will not result in pregnancy. Regular use will not result in pregancy.

    Your gun fires whenever you want it to as many times as it takes to satisfy you, and won't whine incessantly if it has to wait for you through ANOTHER football game.

    A handgun can be reloaded to perform again immediately after use, and will never own more than seventeen pairs of shoes.
    A man in the hands of his enemies is flesh, and shudderingly vulnerable. - author unknown

  11. #11
    VIP Member Array swiftyjuan's Avatar
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    I thought about copying these responses and sending to my wife, but a moment of sanity intervened...
    John
    Assault is a behavior, not a device.

    "Don't never take no shortcuts." Patty Reed, Donner Party

    Lifetime NRA member

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