They Walk Among

This is a discussion on They Walk Among within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; A friend of mine sent this to me, I thought it was funny and good enough to share. enjoy ---------------------------------------------- They Walk Among Us and ...

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Thread: They Walk Among

  1. #1
    Member Array Longbow's Avatar
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    They Walk Among

    A friend of mine sent this to me, I thought it was funny and good enough to share. enjoy
    ----------------------------------------------

    They Walk Among Us and Many Work Retail

    I was at the checkout of a K-Mart. The clerk rang up $46.64 charge. I gave her a fifty dollar bill. She gave me back $46.64. I gave the
    money back to her and told her that she had made a mistake in MY favor. She became indignant and informed me she was Educated and knew what she was doing, and returned the money again. I gave her the Money back .... same scenario! I departed the store with the $46 64

    They Walk Among Us and Many Work Retail
    I walked into a Starbucks with a buy-one-get-one-free coupon for a Grande Latte. I handed it to the girl and she looked over at a little chalkboard that said 'buy one-get one free.' 'They're already buy-one-get-one-free,' she said, 'so I guess they're both free'.
    She Handed me my free Lattes and I walked out the door.

    They Walk Among Us!
    One day I was walking down the beach with some Friends when one of them shouted, 'Look at that dead bird!'. Someone looked up at the
    sky and said, 'Where'?

    They Walk Among Us!
    While looking at a house, my brother asked the real Estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, 'Does the sun rise in the north?' When my brother explained that the sun rises in the East, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, 'Oh I don't keep up with all that stuff.'

    They Walk Among Us!!
    I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, 'The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.' He responded, 'Is that Eastern or Pacific time?' Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, 'Uh, Pacific.'

    They Walk Among Us!
    My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk.

    They Walk Among Us!
    My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The
    cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.
    They Walk Among Us!
    I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area, so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. 'Now,' she asked me, has your plane arrived yet?'

    They Walk Among Us!
    While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man Ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked Him if he
    would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. 'Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungr y
    enough to eat 6 pieces.'

    They Walk Among Us, and they Reproduce, and Worst of all ............

    THEY VOTE
    "Planning to draw and chamber a round after TSHTF is like planning to fasten your seatbelt after you see the other guy run a stopsign..."

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    VIP Member Array ExactlyMyPoint's Avatar
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    When I was at Wendy's, I gave a 16 year old blond girl one of these.



    A look of panic came over her face. She looked at me and said, "Sir. Do you have anything smaller? I don't have enough change in my register."
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    VIP Member Array deadeye72's Avatar
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    When I was at Wendy's, I gave a 16 year old blond girl one of these. A look of panic came over her face. She looked at me and said, "Sir. Do you have anything smaller? I don't have enough change in my register."
    Very funny. Not surprising, but very funny.
    Glock 27
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    Senior Member Array rmarkob's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Longbow View Post
    They Walk Among Us!
    While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. 'Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces.'
    I had a friend who used to use that line all the time as a joke. The ones who thought he was serious are the ones I worry about!
    Clinging to guns and God in PA...

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    Quote Originally Posted by Longbow View Post
    They Walk Among Us!
    While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. 'Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces.'
    Pretty sure that is a Yogi-ism.

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    Quote Originally Posted by GBS View Post
    Pretty sure that is a Yogi-ism.
    Yep, Yogi said it first.
    George

    Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe. Albert Einstein

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    Another one I like is a guy ordered a half dozen chicken McNuggets and was informed they don't have that size, they only come in six or twelve.

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    Distinguished Member Array SixBravo's Avatar
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    I have actually done the Starbucks one, personally (I used to be a shift manager). It was something I would do just to be randomly nice to people. Another example is that occasionally we would get the lines 'Oh it must be free, then' if there was a problem with the transaction. Rather then give the customer a stupid look I would generally nod in agreement and void it. It always got people to smile. Doesn't really bother me if people thought I was an idiot for doing it. I got something out of it.

    The rest... uhg. I can't speak for but.. just wow.
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    VIP Member Array goldshellback's Avatar
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    Wow.
    "Just getting a concealed carry permit means you haven't commited a crime yet. CCP holders commit crimes." Daniel Vice, senior attorney for the Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence, quoted on Fox & Friends, 8 Jul, 2008

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    Some of those were pretty good!
    Rick

    EOD - Initial success or total failure

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    Member Array thomasboxertko's Avatar
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    Are these from California? LOL

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    Senior Member Array Barbary's Avatar
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    I've got one for you. I work in an electronics department in a retail chain store. I have a customer come up to me and ask me if we rent cell phones.

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    Senior Member Array Arkie's Avatar
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    If you really want to see the expression on someones face, just hand them a 2 dollar bill and watch as they try to see if it's a fake. LOL.

    Most of the kids now days has never seen a 2 dollar bill before.

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    Once on the way to work, dressed in my LEO uniform, I stopped and pick up a present for my daughter. I wrote a check and the girl behind the counter asked me for my phone number so that she could write it on the check. I said "911" she said "duh, How could I forget that.
    Psalms 144:1
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    VIP Member Array JonInNY's Avatar
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    Very cute. Just remember, if you come to a fork in the road, take it!
    "Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch; Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote."
    -- Benjamin Franklin

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