Headlines from the year 2029

This is a discussion on Headlines from the year 2029 within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California . White minorities still ...

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Thread: Headlines from the year 2029

  1. #1
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    Headlines from the year 2029

    Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California . White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.

    Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.

    Baby conceived naturally. Scientists stumped.

    Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

    Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the AmericanTerritory of the Middle East (formerly known as Iraq , Afghanistan, Syria and Lebanon).

    Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

    France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica.

    Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

    George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.

    Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

    85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.

    Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

    Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.

    Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals, violates their civil rights.

    Average height of NBA players is now nine feet, seven inches.

    New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.

    Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.

    IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

    Florida voters still having trouble with voting machines.

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    VIP Member Array ExactlyMyPoint's Avatar
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    Humor is only funny because it has an element of truth to it.
    Preparing for the Zombie Apocalypse or Rapture....whichever comes first.

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    VIP Member Array HKinNY's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by exactlymypoint View Post
    Humor is only funny because it has an element of truth to it.
    very true!! When we check out the DC forum in 2026 wonder how much of this would be true

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    Distinguished Member Array Reborn's Avatar
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    I think that I am so skeered........looks like a lot of truth........
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    New keyboard, here...Thanks for the AM laugh!

    Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.

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    VIP Member Array glock27mark's Avatar
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    as funny as it sounds,how true it could be.
    (SHERIFF BUFORD T. JUSTICE) "what the hell is
    the world coming too"

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