Need A Morning Chuckle?
This is a discussion on Need A Morning Chuckle? within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; I received this in a recent e-mail and thought I would share the laugh...
Colonoscopies are no joke, but these comments during the exam were ...
March 29th, 2008 10:19 AM
Need A Morning Chuckle?
I received this in a recent e-mail and thought I would share the laugh...
Colonoscopies are no joke, but these comments during the exam were quite humorous..... A physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his patients (predominately male) while he was performing their Colonoscopies:
1. "Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no man has gone before!
2. "Find Amelia Earhart yet?"
3. "Can you hear me NOW?"
4. "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"
5. "You know, in Arkansas , we're now legally married."
6. "Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?"
7. "You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out..."
8. "Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!"
9. "If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!
10. "Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity."
11. "You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?"
12. "God, now I know why I am not gay."
And the best one of all..
13. "Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?"
The last Blood Moon Tetrad for this millennium starts in April 2014 and ends in September 2015...according to NASA.
Certified Glock Armorer
NRA Life Member[/B]
March 29th, 2008 10:24 AM
Very funny. But I was (blissfully) knocked out during mine, so no wise cracks (pun intended)!
"Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch; Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote."
-- Benjamin Franklin
March 29th, 2008 10:26 AM
Thats what I needed this AM.
An ounce of lead is worth 200lbs of cop.
March 29th, 2008 11:11 AM
Very funny. Needed that this morning. Thanks.
March 29th, 2008 11:16 AM
March 29th, 2008 11:31 AM
"The sword dose not cause the murder, and the maker of the sword dose not bear sin" Rabbi Solomon ben Isaac 11th century
March 29th, 2008 12:25 PM
Me too. Why would anyone want to be awake for that?
Originally Posted by JonInNY
March 29th, 2008 01:58 PM
Preparing for the Zombie Apocalypse or Rapture....whichever comes first.
March 29th, 2008 02:03 PM
That was pretty funny thanks
Kimber Eclipse Target 2
Glock 19 (3rd Gen)
Kahr PM9 (wife's edc)
NRA Life Member
March 29th, 2008 11:20 PM
"If we loose Freedom here, there's no place to escape to. This is the Last Place on Earth!" Ronald Reagan
March 30th, 2008 03:13 PM
There was this young ER doctor who got really nervous whenever he had to perform a pelvic exam, so a nurse suggested he whistle to make himself at ease.
On his next pelvic exam, the patient asked him if he was nervous.
"Why do you ask?"
"Because you're whistling, 'Oh I wish I were an Oscar Meyer weiner!'"
"Each worker carried his sword strapped to his side." Nehemiah 4:18
Guns Save Lives. Paramedics Save Lives. But...
Paramedics With Guns Scare People!
March 30th, 2008 03:58 PM
From someone that has had five colonoscopies, those are pretty good
Coimhéad fearg fhear na foighde; Beware the anger of a patient man.
March 30th, 2008 04:08 PM
Nonsense! Whether the patient is fully or partially sedated the medication causes amnesia. The only way anyone could have, and recall, a conversation with the physician is if they were improperly sedated.
"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
March 31st, 2008 08:03 AM
i didnt have the choice they told me I had to stay awake
Originally Posted by morintp
Calling an illegal alien an 'undocumented immigrant' is like calling a drug dealer an 'unlicensed pharmacist'
De inimico non Loquaris sed cogites.
Do not wish ill for your enemy, plan for it!
March 31st, 2008 08:22 AM
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