Butt Dust!

Butt Dust!

This is a discussion on Butt Dust! within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Not one to post many funnies - most have round the web countless times ...... anyways this one seemed new and some nice chuckles within. ...

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Thread: Butt Dust!

  1. #1
    VIP Member (Retired Staff) Array P95Carry's Avatar
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    Talking Butt Dust!

    Not one to post many funnies - most have round the web countless times ...... anyways this one seemed new and some nice chuckles within.

    Kids ... bless 'em!!


    What, you ask, is 'Butt dust?' Read on and you'll discover the joy in

    These have to be original and genuine. No adult is this creative!!

    JACK (age 3) was watching his Mom breast-feeding his new baby sister.
    After a while he asked: 'Mom why have you got two? Is one for hot and
    one for cold milk?'

    MELANIE (age 5) asked her Granny how old she was.. Granny replied she
    was so old she didn't remember any more. Melanie said, 'If you don't
    remember you must look in the back of your panties. Mine say five to

    STEVEN (age 3) hugged and kissed his Mom good night. 'I love you so much
    that when you die I'm going to bury you outside my bedroom window.'

    BRITTANY (age 4) had an earache and wanted a pain killer. She tried in
    vain to take the lid off the bottle. S eeing her frustration, her Mom
    explained it was a child-proof cap and she'd have to open it for her.
    Eyes wide with wonder, the little girl asked: 'How does it know it's

    SUSAN (age 4) was drinking juice when she got the hiccups. 'Please don't
    give me this juice again,' she said, 'It makes my teeth cough.'

    DJ (age 4) stepped onto the bathroom scale and asked: 'How much do I

    MARC (age 4) was engrossed in a young couple that were hugging and
    kissing in a restaurant. Without taking his eyes off them, he asked his
    dad: 'Why is he whispering in her mouth?'

    CLINTON (age 5) was in his bedroom looking worried. When his Mom asked
    what was troubling him, he replied, 'I don't know what'll happen with
    this bed when I get married. How will my wife fit in?'

    JAMES (age 4) was listening to a Bible story. His dad read: 'The man
    name d Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city but his
    wife looked back and was turned to salt.' Concerned, James asked: 'What
    happened to the flea?'

    TAMMY (age 4) was with her mother when they met an elderly, rather
    wrinkled woman her Mom knew. Tammy looked at her for a while and then
    asked, 'Why doesn't your skin fit your face?'

    The Sermon I think this Mom will never forget.... this particular Sunday
    sermon...'Lord,' the minister began, with arms extended toward heaven
    and a rapturous look on his upturned face. 'Without you, we are but
    dust...' He would have continued but at that moment my very obedient
    daughter who was listening leaned over to me and asked quite audibly in
    her shrill little four year old girl voice, 'Mom, what is butt dust?'
    Chris - P95
    NRA Certified Instructor & NRA Life Member.

    "To own a gun and assume that you are armed
    is like owning a piano and assuming that you are a musician!."

    http://www.rkba-2a.com/ - a portal for 2A links, articles and some videos.

  2. #2
    VIP Member Array rodc13's Avatar
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    Right up there with the youngster who proudly announced that he had discovered the two shortest people in the bible:

    "Bildad the Shu-hite and Ne-hi-miah."
    "We're paratroopers. We're supposed to be surrounded!" Dick Winters

  3. #3
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    got to love kids, even if they can embarrass you to death sometimes! LOL

  4. #4
    VIP Member Array miklcolt45's Avatar
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    @ Wits' End
    Quote Originally Posted by rodc13 View Post
    Right up there with the youngster who proudly announced that he had discovered the two shortest people in the bible:

    "Bildad the Shu-hite and Ne-hi-miah."
    Actually, St. Peter was shorter. He fell asleep on his watch.
    He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose. - Jim Elliott

    The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it.
    Albert Einstein

  5. #5
    Senior Member Array Arkie's Avatar
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    Oct 2005
    HAHAHAHA Those were funny!!!

    Thanks Chris for the Chuckles.

  6. #6
    VIP Member Array JonInNY's Avatar
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    Very cute. I forgot what it's like to have small kids around... mine are all grown <sigh>.
    "Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch; Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote."
    -- Benjamin Franklin

  7. #7
    VIP Member Array deadeye72's Avatar
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    There is truly never a dull moment with children. Those were funny. Thanks for posting.
    Glock 27

  8. #8
    EW3 is offline
    Senior Member Array EW3's Avatar
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    My 3 year old nephew was over my parents where he was given some chocolate:

    "Mmm, I love chocolate...tastes just like candy"
    "Naked and Starving as They are We Cannot Enough Admire the Incomparable Patience and Fidelity of the Soldiery" – George Washington, Valley Forge, 1777.

  9. #9
    Senior Member Array cmidkiff's Avatar
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    Jan 2005
    Kansas City, Missouri
    When my 2nd daughter got the chance to ride in the front seat of the car, she seemed fascinated. Paid close attention to what I was doing, watched the road, fiddled with the radio, etc. When we pulled in to a light to make a left, she looked over at me and asked:

    Daddy, how does the car know you are turning left?

    I guess she couldn't see me hitting the signal on the other side of the wheel, but she could see the turn signal indicator. I've been laughing about that one for years now :)
    Liberty is an inherently offensive lifestyle. Living in a free society guarantees that each one of us will see our most cherished principles and beliefs questioned and in some cases mocked. It's worth it.

  10. #10
    VIP Member Array TN_Mike's Avatar
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    Shelby County TN
    Those are some funny ones.

    Here's one that happened to me:
    Our twins are 5, almost 6 years old now. Last summer, they were riding their tricycles down the hill out back and having a ball at it.
    As I watched from the top of the hill, Scott asked me to give him a push to get him going even faster down the hill. When I did he got about half way down and threw himself off of the trike. When he got to the top of the hill I asked him why he had thrown himself off the trike and his answer was a good one.
    He thought about it for a second or two and then said "Well, I guess because I'm 5."
    That was the best answer I could imagine.
    ,=====o00o _
    l_--- \___l---[]lllllll[]
    (o)_)-o- (o)_)--o-)_)

  11. #11
    Lead Moderator
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    When my brother was little he was "helping" my Dad install some insulation in the attic of our home. He had been playing in the "soft" insulation all day and after awhile it got under his skin and began itching.

    He came down from upstairs crying to my mother and emphatically said, "I don't like that itch-u-lation."

  12. #12
    Distinguished Member Array morintp's Avatar
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    Dec 2007
    Those were great Chris. I'll add one of my stories too.

    One of my brothers, who was about 3 or 4 at the time, was riding with my mom and they went past a farm. She pointed out the cows and told him that's where milk comes from. Then he asked her how they got the cartons out.

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