Anatomy of an IDPA match.

Anatomy of an IDPA match.

This is a discussion on Anatomy of an IDPA match. within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Dawn is cracking. Ok, we need to set up the Cofs, what props do we need to get? Who has a copy of the CoFs ...

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  1. #1
    VIP Member
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    Wink Anatomy of an IDPA match.

    Dawn is cracking. Ok, we need to set up the Cofs, what props do we need to get? Who has a copy of the CoFs anyway? Where is he? Call him on the cell! Where are you? Well drop the McMuffin and hurry the heck up, would ya? No, I am tired of shooting El Presidente. He is finally here. OK, we need 12 barrels, 18 stands, 7 barricades, 2 chairs, 36 2x1ís, the desk and the fake computer. Where is the prop door? What in hell is doing way down there? Got it? Watch my fingers! It is OK, the pain is subsiding. Where the hell is everybody? Ok, letís set up now, we are wasting daylight. Ahh damn it! We are out of staples! Somebody run to Home Depot and get a couple of boxes and bring some 9 volt batteries while you are at it. I need to paint the hands on the Non-Threats, whereís the spray paint? Hello? You still at Home Depot? Bring a can of black spray paint. Yeah. No, nothing else. Hurry back. Ok, letís get the target stapled. Hey Joe, paint the hands. On the targets not on yourself. We are almost ready people! Where did everybody come from all of the sudden? I am sweating like crazy, need to change my shirt already. Where are my Safety Officers? Do we have Safety Officers? Score sheets Ready? New Shooters go see the Safety Director! ScoreMaster, everything ready? Everybody paid up? No, we donít take IOUís and you just have to reboot the laptop and start all over. WALK-THRU! Nononono that is Tactical Priority. At least two shots per target, shoot till you are happy. The pasters and the timers are in my truck, spare batteries are in Joeís car, the one that we used as prop and got shot up last match. Safety Officers, call your squads! No Jose, you canít use your wifeís offset holster. I can park a 4x4 in that gap. It is not legal. WE ARE GOING HOT! EYES AND EARS!
    We need more pasters. I know, the Cofís are supposed to be revolver-friendly, I guess we screwed up, it wonít happen again, I promise. Ahhh crap, is it gonna rain again? Are we out of plastic? More pasters? Are they using them as confetti? Sheesh! We done shooting? Good! Letís tear down people? Where the hell is everybody? Are they gone already? Just take the crap down and throw it in the corner, I am too tired to screw with it now. Are all the scoresheets in? Why did he take Squad Twosís scoresheet home with him? Yeah, he is a tad brain damaged I supposed. Oh hell, letís get out of here, I need a beer.
    You have to make the shot when fire is smoking, people are screaming, dogs are barking, kids are crying and sirens are coming.
    Randy Cain.

    Ego will kill you. Leave it at home.
    Signed: Me!


  2. #2
    Senior Member Array cmidkiff's Avatar
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    Thumbs up That was great Miggy

    Was that a typical IDPA Day?

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    VIP Member Array Bud White's Avatar
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    Never shoot a course not many round me and im not a good game player anywways

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    New Member Array pjones5's Avatar
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    Smile

    Quote Originally Posted by QKShooter
    Was that a typical IDPA Day?
    YES IT WAS!!!!!!!!!
    PAT

  6. #6
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    Hahaha - Good one Miggy .

    I'd say that on any given IDPA day at our club - a significant amount of that could be true (eh Corey? (cmu)).
    Chris - P95
    NRA Certified Instructor & NRA Life Member.

    "To own a gun and assume that you are armed
    is like owning a piano and assuming that you are a musician!."


    http://www.rkba-2a.com/ - a portal for 2A links, articles and some videos.

  7. #7
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    And I imagine every club has its own particulars that makes them unique.

    The shooters themselves that have become a zoology example and I think they might not me too unique and every club may have their own versions. IE:

    The Imelda Marcos: Those who actually have more holsters put away in closets than Imelda Marcos had shoes.

    Super Ninja: Has every new gadget that came out last week and a couple that haven't yet. They carry hydration systems, night vision goggles, Pelican case for his cigars, 4 types of knives, half the Surefire catalog, tactical footwear, tactical shirts, tactical webbing and tactical undies.

    The Dollar Store: Just the opposite as the Super Ninja. He goes as cheap as possible 'cause he is there just to shoot damn it. All his peripheral gear was bought at WalMart 'cause it was on the way to the range. We even have a shooter in this category that carries his stuff in a 5 gallon bucket. Don't mess with him though, he is top shooter.

    Brass Animals: These come in two species, the Brass Chicken who bends over and selects carefuly every piece of brass and the Brass Hog who just attacks and shoves anything that looks like brass into a bag and selects later. Both hate CCI and Wolf shooters.

    The Chip McCormicks: Simply stated they are 1911 owners that bring more mags than ammunition to a match and blame any malfunction, wild shot, hit to Non-Threat and procedurals to the magazines.

    Gunsmith Lovers: Those who spend more time with their gunsmith that with their families. They are usually on the phone after a match making an appointment with the gunsmith to give their guns that ultimate tweak that will help them increase their scores.

    Amnesia Folks: They either forget to bring some gear of go home leaving some stuff at the range. From eye protection to their Kimbers, everything is fair to leave behind.

    The Swallows of Capistrano: Get to a match 5 seconds before it starts and are in their cars and gunning down the road before the last piece of brass hits the dirt. They have never seen how to set up an IDPA match in their lives.

    There are more, but I am on my day off and I wanna rest
    You have to make the shot when fire is smoking, people are screaming, dogs are barking, kids are crying and sirens are coming.
    Randy Cain.

    Ego will kill you. Leave it at home.
    Signed: Me!

  8. #8
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    More fun Miggy - just love it
    Brass Chicken
    Hehe - guilty
    Chris - P95
    NRA Certified Instructor & NRA Life Member.

    "To own a gun and assume that you are armed
    is like owning a piano and assuming that you are a musician!."


    http://www.rkba-2a.com/ - a portal for 2A links, articles and some videos.

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