Lie Detector

Lie Detector

This is a discussion on Lie Detector within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; John was a salesman's delight when it came to any kind of unusual gimmick. His wife Marsha had long ago given up trying to get ...

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Thread: Lie Detector

  1. #1
    Distinguished Member Array CT-Mike's Avatar
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    Lie Detector

    John was a salesman's delight when it came to any kind of unusual gimmick.
    His wife Marsha had long ago given up trying to get him to change. One day
    John came home with another one of his unusual purchases. It was a robot
    that John claimed was actually a lie detector.

    It was about 5:30 that afternoon when Tommy, their 11 year old son,
    returned home from school. Tommy was over 2 hours late.

    Where have you been? Why are you over 2 hours late getting home?' asked
    John. Several of us went to the library to work on an extra credit project,
    said Tommy. The robot then walked around the table and slapped Tommy,
    knocking him completely out of his chair.

    Son, said John, this robot is a lie detector, now tell us where you really
    were after school.

    We went to Bobby's house and watched a movie.' said Tommy. What did you
    watch?' asked Marsha. The Ten Commandments. answered Tommy.

    The robot went around to Tommy and once again slapped him, knocking him off
    his chair once more. With his lip quivering, Tommy got up, sat down and
    said, I am sorry I lied. We really watched a tape called Sex Queen.

    I am ashamed of you son, said John. 'When I was your age, I never lied to
    my parents. The robot then walked around to John and delivered a whack
    that nearly knocked him out of his chair.

    Marsha doubled over in laughter, almost in tears and said, 'Boy, did you
    ever ask for that one! You can't be too mad with Tommy. After all, he is
    your son! With that the robot immediately walked around to Marsha and
    knocked her out of her chair.
    "The natural progress of things is for liberty to yield, and government to gain ground."

    - Thomas Jefferson

    "I'm the arrow, you're my bow, shoot me forth and I will go"

    "Do not let any individual posts put a knot in your Big Boy Under-Roos"


  2. #2
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  3. #3
    VIP Member Array deadeye72's Avatar
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    Where can I get one of those. Wait, never mind. That might not be too smart.
    Glock 27
    BENELLI NOVA

  4. #4
    VIP Member Array Kerbouchard's Avatar
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    Yeah, I don't think I need one of those around...

    Great post...thanks for sharing!
    There are two sides to every issue: one side is right and the other is wrong, but the middle is always evil.

    http://miscmusings.townhall.com/

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  5. #5
    VIP Member Array Ridgeline's Avatar
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    OMG, I would never have been able to sit at the dinner table, just put my plate on the floor.
    "Eternity is Too Long to be Wrong"

    Texas CHL Instructor & Holder & Utah CFP Instructor
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  6. #6
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    ha ha ha that was better than most of the DC jokes i read.
    I havenít heard any of the journalists who volunteered to be waterboarded asking to have their fingernails wrenched out with pliers, or electrodes attached to their genitals.

  7. #7
    Distinguished Member Array morintp's Avatar
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    Good one!

  8. #8
    VIP Member Array Eagleks's Avatar
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    I wish I would have had one..... it would have cut another 10 yrs off my marriage, and would avoided a lot of learning the hard way.

    GREAT ONE THOUGH !!!!

  9. #9
    VIP Member Array JonInNY's Avatar
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    Almost knew that punchline was coming, but it was very funny!
    "Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch; Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote."
    -- Benjamin Franklin

  10. #10
    Member Array Army22rpr's Avatar
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    Taht was a knee slapper!!

  11. #11
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    I'll keep quiet, don't want to get knocked out of my chair!!

  12. #12
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    That was a good one!
    Rick

    EOD - Initial success or total failure

  13. #13
    VIP Member Array raevan's Avatar
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    That robot needs a "what me worry" chip that can be programed to react to other peoples lies but not my own.

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