This is a discussion on Lawyer Joke within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; ...
When you’re wounded and left on Afghanistan’s plains,
And the women come out to cut up what remains,
Just roll to your rifle and blow out your brains,
And go to your God like a soldier.
Their are no lawyer jokes.
Their are only true stories about lawyers that happen to be funny.
Good one Captain
“You can sway a thousand men by appealing to their prejudices quicker than you can convince one man by logic.”
― Robert A. Heinlein,
Criminal lawyer is redundant......
What's funny about that?
There are two sides to every issue: one side is right and the other is wrong, but the middle is always evil.
Who is John Galt?
A guy walks into a bar and says all lawyer's are Buttholes. Another guy stands up and says I resent that. The first says are you a lawyer. The second guy says no I'm a Butthole.
OK, as long as this was started (and my sincere apologies to any attorneys out there)...
Picture this: A lawyer, is all alone in the middle of the desert, surrounded by sand and desolation, and is buried up to his nose in the sand.
What's missing from this picture?
One more bucket of sand.
Last edited by JonInNY; June 6th, 2008 at 08:27 PM.
"Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch; Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote."
-- Benjamin Franklin
Why do they bury lawyers 12 feet down rather than 6 feet like everyone else?
Cause down deep they are really nice guys.
What is the difference between a lawyer and a catfish?
One is a bottom dwelling, garbage eating, scum sucker
and the other is a fish.
Both originally told to me by an attorney.
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe. Albert Einstein
What do you call 10,000 lawyers at the bottom of the sea?
A good start!
"Eternity is Too Long to be Wrong"
Texas CHL Instructor & Holder & Utah CFP Instructor
NRA Instructor & Life Member
Member TSRA, USCCA, TCHA
Christian, Heterosexual, Pro-2A, Pro-Life, Conservative, Common Sense American
What do you call a bus load of lawyers going over the side of a cliff.
If it has one empty seat then it is,
A crying shame.
there is only one lawyer joke...
the rest are all true :)
Quando Omni Flunkus Moratati
99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
Assault is a behavior, not a device.
"Don't never take no shortcuts." Patty Reed, Donner Party
Lifetime NRA member