Lawyer Joke

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Thread: Lawyer Joke

  1. June 5th, 2008 11:46 AM #1
    Captain Crunch [OP]
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    Lawyer Joke



    When you’re wounded and left on Afghanistan’s plains,
    And the women come out to cut up what remains,
    Just roll to your rifle and blow out your brains,
    And go to your God like a soldier.

    Rudyard Kipling

    Terry
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  2. June 5th, 2008 11:46 AM Remove Ads
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  3. June 5th, 2008 11:47 AM #2
    deadeye72
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  4. June 5th, 2008 11:53 AM #3
    MitchellCT
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    Their are no lawyer jokes.

    Their are only true stories about lawyers that happen to be funny.
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  5. June 5th, 2008 11:56 AM #4
    pgrass101
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    Good one Captain
    Noli nothis permittere te terere

    Lord, Grant me a good sword and no need to use it.
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  6. June 5th, 2008 12:15 PM #5
    David in FL
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    Criminal lawyer is redundant......
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  7. June 5th, 2008 01:25 PM #6
    Kerbouchard
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    What's funny about that?
    There are two sides to every issue: one side is right and the other is wrong, but the middle is always evil.

    http://miscmusings.townhall.com/

    Who is John Galt?
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  8. June 5th, 2008 03:16 PM #7
    ExactlyMyPoint Contrib Icon
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    Quote Originally Posted by MitchellCT View Post
    Their are no lawyer jokes.

    Their are only true stories about lawyers that happen to be funny.
    +1 on that
    Preparing for the Zombie Apocalypse or Rapture....whichever comes first.
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  9. June 5th, 2008 11:04 PM #8
    ccman Contrib Icon
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    A guy walks into a bar and says all lawyer's are Buttholes. Another guy stands up and says I resent that. The first says are you a lawyer. The second guy says no I'm a Butthole.
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  10. June 6th, 2008 11:42 AM #9
    tankdriver
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    Quote Originally Posted by David in FL View Post
    Criminal lawyer is redundant......
    Christian Lawyer is a oxymoron.....
    1942 M3 Autocar Half-track...M3A1 Diamond T Half-track...57mm Anti-Tank Cannon

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  11. June 6th, 2008 12:02 PM #10
    JonInNY
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    OK, as long as this was started (and my sincere apologies to any attorneys out there)...

    Picture this: A lawyer, is all alone in the middle of the desert, surrounded by sand and desolation, and is buried up to his nose in the sand.

    What's missing from this picture?
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    One more bucket of sand.
    Last edited by JonInNY; June 6th, 2008 at 08:27 PM.
    "Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch; Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote."
    -- Benjamin Franklin
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  12. June 6th, 2008 08:01 PM #11
    dr_cmg
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    Why do they bury lawyers 12 feet down rather than 6 feet like everyone else?











    Cause down deep they are really nice guys.


    What is the difference between a lawyer and a catfish?











    One is a bottom dwelling, garbage eating, scum sucker





    and the other is a fish.

    Both originally told to me by an attorney.
    George

    Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe. Albert Einstein
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  13. June 6th, 2008 08:42 PM #12
    Ridgeline
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    What do you call 10,000 lawyers at the bottom of the sea?









    A good start!
    "Eternity is Too Long to be Wrong"

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    Member TSRA, USCCA, TCHA
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  14. June 6th, 2008 10:15 PM #13
    FN1910
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    What do you call a bus load of lawyers going over the side of a cliff.

    A Shame.


    If it has one empty seat then it is,














    A crying shame.
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  15. June 7th, 2008 09:57 AM #14
    StcLurker
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    there is only one lawyer joke...








    the rest are all true :)
    Quando Omni Flunkus Moratati
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  16. June 7th, 2008 11:58 AM #15
    swiftyjuan
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    99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
    John
    Assault is a behavior, not a device.

    "Don't never take no shortcuts." Patty Reed, Donner Party

    Lifetime NRA member
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