Guy weight loss program

Guy weight loss program

This is a discussion on Guy weight loss program within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. Weight loss program. The next day, there's a knock on the door and there ...

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Thread: Guy weight loss program

  1. #1
    VIP Member Array dukalmighty's Avatar
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    Feb 2008

    Guy weight loss program

    A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. Weight loss program.

    The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.

    She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.The sign reads, 'If you can catch me, you can have me.' Without a second thought, he takes off after her. A few miles later puffing and puffing, he finally gives up. The same girl shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens.

    On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10 lbs. As promised.

    He calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound program.
    -------- The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life. She is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, 'If you catch me you can have me'.

    Well, he's out the door after her like a shot. This girl is in excellent shape and he does his best, but no such luck. So for the next four days, the same routine happens with him gradually getting in better and better shape.

    Much to his delight on the fifth day when he weighs himself, he discovers that he has lost another 20 lbs. As promised.

    He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50 pound program.

    'Are you sure?' asks the representative on the phone. 'This is our most rigorous program.' 'Absolutely,' he replies, 'I haven't felt this good in years.'

    The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he finds a huge muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads, 'If I catch you, you're mine.' He lost 63 pounds that week
    I believe I'll pass
    "Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country,"
    --Mayor Marion Barry, Washington , DC .

  2. #2
    VIP Member Array deadeye72's Avatar
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    Feb 2008
    Central Mississippi
    That is hilarious.
    Glock 27

  3. #3
    VIP Member Array David in FL's Avatar
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    Nov 2007
    Central Florida

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  5. #4
    Member Array TampaShooters's Avatar
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    Jun 2008
    Tampa, FL
    Good one.
    Member: NRA & GSSF
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  6. #5
    Senior Moderator
    Array RETSUPT99's Avatar
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    Central Florida
    Was this in San Fransisco?
    Proverbs 27:12 says: “The prudent see danger and take refuge, but the simple keep going and suffer for it.”

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  7. #6
    VIP Member Array ExactlyMyPoint's Avatar
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    Sep 2006
    Portland, OR
    What is the toll free order number?
    Preparing for the Zombie Apocalypse or Rapture....whichever comes first.

  8. #7
    Array atctimmy's Avatar
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    Jan 2008
    On day two I'd be up early and planning an ambush.
    I live for others and I answer to God and sometimes to my wife too.

  9. #8
    Member Array Derrin33's Avatar
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    Apr 2007
    Bartlesville, Oklahoma
    My wife is getting really tired of cleaning various beverages off the computer fellas. THAT was funny!!!
    God Bless America!!

  10. #9
    VIP Member Array hogdaddy's Avatar
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    Mar 2008
    N/E Florida
    I NEED 20lb program

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