Sheldon J...you're a sick puppy!
This is a discussion on Bubba within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Bubba was bragging to his boss one day, "You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them." ...
Bubba was bragging to his boss one day, "You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them."
Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff, "OK, Bubba how about Tom Cruise?"
"Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it. " So Bubba and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's door, and sure enough, Tom Cruise, shouts, "Bubba! Great to see you! You and your friend come right in and join me for lunch! "
Although impressed, Bubba's boss is still skeptical. After they leave Cruise's house, he tells Bubba that he thinks Bubba's knowing Cruise was just lucky.
"No, no, just name anyone else," Bubba says.
"President Clinton," his boss quickly retorts.
"Yes," Bubba says, "I know him, let's fly out to Washington."
And off they go. At the White House, Clinton spots Bubba on the tour and motions him and his boss over, saying, "Bubba, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let's have a cup of coffee first and catch up." Well, the boss is very shaken by now, but still not totally convinced.
After they leave the White house grounds, he expresses his doubts to Bubba, who again implores him to name anyone else.
"The Pope," his boss replies. "Sure!" says Bubba.
"My folks are from Poland, and I've known the Pope a long time."
So off they fly to Rome. Bubba and his boss are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Bubba says, "This will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the Pope." And he disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican. Sure enough, half an hour later Bubba emerges with the Pope on the balcony. But by the time Bubba returns, he finds that his boss has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics.
Working his way to his boss' side, Bubba asks him, "What happened?" His boss looks up and says, "I was doing fine until you and the Pope came out on the balcony and the man next to me said, "Who's that on the balcony with Bubba?"
"The sword dose not cause the murder, and the maker of the sword dose not bear sin" Rabbi Solomon ben Isaac 11th century
Sheldon J...you're a sick puppy!
Proverbs 27:12 says: “The prudent see danger and take refuge, but the simple keep going and suffer for it.”
Certified Glock Armorer
NRA Life Member
good chuckle to start the day.....
"It is better to live one day as a lion than a hundred years as a sheep."
- Italian proverb
An oldie, but goodie!
God bless our troops!
The Pope made a trip to America, New York City ot be exact. While there, he was informed of a small yet devout group of Catholics down in south Georgia, so he made special arrangements to be driven there overnight for a quick visit. A single limousine was to carry him directly to the church, and immediately back to his hotel.
Once he was done with his errand, he headed back to New York, but soon told the driver that he had to pee. Unfortunately, they were in the middle of a great forest, with no facilities for miles. The Pope insisted that they pull over to the side of the road. The driver agreed, as he also needed to heed the call of nature.
The Pope then insisted that he be allowed to drive for awhile, so that the driver could get some rest, and he could practice his driving, as the lonely highway was surely a safe place to be. The driver, being a good Catholic, eventually agreed, but insisted that they switch as soon as they came upon other traffic.
Shortly thereafter, the Pope noticed a police officer behind him, so he pulled over. Soon there was a Georgia Deputy Sheriff standing at the window, mirrored aviator glasses reflecting the morning sun, a plug of chew prominent in his cheek.
"Do you know how fast you were going?"
"No, no, I'm afraid I don't."
"Well, you were traveling down this here road more'n 20 miles over the speed limit!"
"My humble apologies, officer, the speed limit is much higher where I live."
"Hey, you're German, yeah, the autobahn and all that. Wait. Shoooot, hold on... I'll be right back!"
The Deputy gets on his car radio and calls for the Sheriff.
"Whatchu got out there, Deputy? I was in a meetin'."
"Sheriff, I done got me a New York City limo pulled over out here, and I think I got me a VIP in that there limo. I'm a feared I don't rightly know what to do!"
"Well, if it's the Governor, you best let him be!"
"No Sir, I reckon this feller is much more powerful than the Governor!"
"Well if it's the President, you best let him be too!"
"Naw, I reckon this feller is much more powerful than even the President!"
"Well dog gone it, who ya got in that limo?"
"I don't rightly know, Sir, but he must be some kinda important , cause he's got the Pope driving for him!"
"Each worker carried his sword strapped to his side." Nehemiah 4:18
Guns Save Lives. Paramedics Save Lives. But...
Paramedics With Guns Scare People!