For Dads with Girls

For Dads with Girls

This is a discussion on For Dads with Girls within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Little Bruce and Jenny are only 14 years old, but they just know that they are in love. One day they decide that they want ...

Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 34

Thread: For Dads with Girls

  1. #1
    VIP Member Array dukalmighty's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    texas
    Posts
    15,179

    For Dads with Girls

    Little Bruce and Jenny are only 14 years old, but they just know that they are in love.

    One day they decide that they want to get married, so Bruce goes to Jenny's father to ask him for her hand. Bruce bravely walks up to him and says, "Mr. Smith, me and Jenny are in love and I want to ask you for her hand in marriage."

    Thinking that this was just the cutest thing, Mr. Smith replies, "Well Bruce, you are only 14. Where will you two live?"

    Without even taking a moment to think about it, Bruce replies, "In Jenny's room. It's bigger than mine and we can both fit there nicely."

    Still thinking this is just adorable, Mr. Smith says with a huge grin, "Okay, then how will you live? You're not old enough to get a job. You'll need to support Jenny."

    Again, Bruce instantly replies, "Our allowance & Jenny makes 5 bucks a week and I make 10 bucks a week. That's about 60 bucks a month and that should do us just fine."

    By this time, Mr. Smith is a little shocked that Bruce has put so much thought into this. He thinks for a moment, trying to come up with something that Bruce won't have an answer to. After a second, Mr. Smith says, "Well, Bruce, it seems like you have got everything all figured out. I just have one more question for you. What will you do if the two of you should have little ones of your own?"

    Bruce just shrugs his shoulders and says, "Well, we've been lucky so far."

    Mr. Smith no longer thinks the little twirp is adorable
    "Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country,"
    --Mayor Marion Barry, Washington , DC .


  2. #2
    VIP Member Array aus71383's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    WA
    Posts
    2,543
    Wow great surprise ending!

    Austin

  3. #3
    Senior Member Array luvmyglock's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Washington
    Posts
    641
    Nice. I have a daughter, and let me tell you she will not be hanging around with Bruce!
    EVIL PREVAILS WHEN GOOD MEN FAIL TO ACT.

  4. #4
    Member Array Jason Rogers's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    Lorton Virginia
    Posts
    211
    My wife and I have a little girl who will be 3 in Nov. and we are expecting another little girl in Oct. I am dreading the very idea that they will on day start dating. I'm sure there is a boy like in this story in my future. I just hope it will hapen in their 30s, not at 14.-Jay

  5. #5
    Member Array KG4ZRC's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    on the way to PRK
    Posts
    305


    The day is coming for me... My daughter is 11 right now...

  6. #6
    VIP Member Array HKinNY's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    Nassau, NY(Long Island)
    Posts
    2,855
    Mine is 9, last year at disney on line she sees 2 teenage girls in front of her with the shorts rolled over so they are short shorts and my daugther starts to do the same. I look at my wife she looks at me and I take my hand and stab myself in the heart. Will be the dad at kitchen tabel cleaning all the guns when first date shows up.

    To Jd and Lima wait you will see.

  7. #7
    VIP Member
    Array atctimmy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Gastonville
    Posts
    6,736
    Little Bruce would have found it hard to breath with all 230 lbs of me standing on his chest while I slapped him silly.
    A word of warning; if you can afford to do more Bear does not recommend giving your wife two pieces of bubble gum for her birthday.

  8. #8
    VIP Member Array HKinNY's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    Nassau, NY(Long Island)
    Posts
    2,855
    Quote Originally Posted by atctimmy View Post
    Little Bruce would have found it hard to breath with all 230 lbs of me standing on his chest while I slapped him silly.
    I am laughing while looking at your avitar with your quote.

  9. #9
    Moderator
    Array RETSUPT99's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Central Florida
    Posts
    45,469

    I can laugh...we never had girls.
    The last Blood Moon Tetrad for this millennium starts in April 2014 and ends in September 2015...according to NASA.

    ***********************************
    Certified Glock Armorer
    NRA Life Member[/B]

  10. #10
    VIP Member
    Array Miggy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Miami-Dade, FL
    Posts
    6,258

    Good one. Stolen and posted somewhere else.
    You have to make the shot when fire is smoking, people are screaming, dogs are barking, kids are crying and sirens are coming.
    Randy Cain.

    Ego will kill you. Leave it at home.
    Signed: Me!

  11. #11
    Senior Member Array cmidkiff's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Kansas City, Missouri
    Posts
    835
    I have 4 girls, ages 12, 14, 16, and 20...

    ... and I no longer find this type of joke amusing.

    Go ahead, laugh it up. You'll see...
    Liberty is an inherently offensive lifestyle. Living in a free society guarantees that each one of us will see our most cherished principles and beliefs questioned and in some cases mocked. It's worth it.

  12. #12
    Senior Member Array Musketeer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    701
    My daughter is 6 and this scares me already.

    Standing rules for dating my daughter.

    1. Anything you do to her I will do to you but harder.
    2. If you make my daughter cry I will make you cry.

  13. #13
    VIP Member Array cvhoss's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Kansas
    Posts
    2,046
    I've put these on this board before, but this seems like a good thread to repost them on. I've linked to a PDF file so you can print them out if you want and hand them out to your daughter's dates.

    Rules For Dating My Daughter

    #9 is my favorite.

    You younger guys with daughters may have to edit #10 to reflect a different era than us older guys.

    Hoss
    Sig 239 SAS 40 S&W / Sig 239 9mm / Kahr PM-9 / Walther PPS .40 / Sig P-245 / Ruger LCP
    Beretta Tomcat / Walther PPK / BDA 380 / Taurus 85 / Kel-Tec PF-9 / Am. Derringer 357

    NRA Life Member
    My Web Site

  14. #14
    Senior Member Array PaulG's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    Fairfax, VA
    Posts
    1,126
    Raise 'em right and things will be fine.

    Be involved with your daughter's life. She needs both love and discipline.

    My daughter is 30 and engaged to a real keeper (he shoots better than I do).

    I worried about her as she was growing up, too. But she turned out fine.

    Just remember the line from the movie Clueless when Cher's dad told her date, "if anything happens to my daughter, I have a shovel and a 45. I doubt you would be missed".
    fortiter in re, suaviter in modo (resolutely in action, gently in manner).

  15. #15
    Member Array IfIhaveto's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    TX
    Posts
    262
    Quote Originally Posted by Jason Rogers View Post
    My wife and I have a little girl who will be 3 in Nov. and we are expecting another little girl in Oct. I am dreading the very idea that they will on day start dating. I'm sure there is a boy like in this story in my future. I just hope it will hapen in their 30s, not at 14.-Jay


    I'm already there.... It's difficult for me...boy is it difficult..But that's life...(17,19,21,23 all girls)

Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast

Sponsored Links

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

Similar Threads

  1. My Girls...
    By Siafu in forum Defensive Carry Guns
    Replies: 21
    Last Post: August 29th, 2008, 10:59 PM
  2. For New Dads Only....
    By Miggy in forum Off Topic & Humor Discussion
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: February 15th, 2008, 10:08 AM
  3. Girls In The IDF
    By Sig229 in forum Off Topic & Humor Discussion
    Replies: 51
    Last Post: October 3rd, 2006, 03:12 AM
  4. My girls
    By Tom357 in forum General Firearm Discussion
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: August 16th, 2005, 12:11 PM