For the Women

For the Women

This is a discussion on For the Women within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Giving Up Wine I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked me for ...

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Thread: For the Women

  1. #1
    VIP Member Array dukalmighty's Avatar
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    For the Women

    Giving Up Wine




    I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner.

    I took out my wallet, got out ten dollars and asked, 'If I give you this money, will you buy wine with it instead of dinner?'

    'No, I had to stop drinking years ago', the homeless woman told me.

    'Will you use it to go shopping instead of buying food?' I asked.

    'No, I don't waste time shopping,' the homeless woman said. 'I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive.'

    'Will you spend this on a beauty salon instead of food?' I asked.

    'Are you NUTS!' replied the homeless woman. I haven't had my hair done in 20 years!'

    'Well, I said, 'I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you out for dinner with my husband and me tonight.'

    The homeless Woman was shocked. 'Won't your husband be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting.'

    I said, 'That's okay. It's important for him to see what a woman looks like after she has given up shopping, hair appointments, and wine.'
    "Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country,"
    --Mayor Marion Barry, Washington , DC .


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    VIP Member Array raevan's Avatar
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    Thats great.

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    "Don't hit a man if you can possibly avoid it; but if you do hit him, put him to sleep." - Theodore Roosevelt

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    Distinguished Member Array XD 45's Avatar
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    good one
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    VIP Member Array JonInNY's Avatar
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    I'm afraid to show that one to my wife!
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    FUNNY.
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