I was packing Paymeister's lunch one morning and remembered I had set a gopher trap in the back yard. So I checked it and found a fat, sleek gopher. He should have been sleek; he'd been eating my garden. Grrr. So I took him in the house... and looked at Paymeister's empty lunch bag. Heh heh heh.
I pulled a stick out of a corn dog from the freezer and put it in the gopher (hey, it was dead and not feeling anything). Then I bagged it in the lunch bag, with a note that said, "I'm committed to giving you healthy food from our back yard garden, and this is really fresh. Enjoy!" I also stuffed $5 in the bottom of the bag so he wouldn't go hungry (afterall, the gopher wasn't cooked). And off he went to teach school.
Halfway through the morning I called the biology teachers' room. One of the other teachers answered and I told him about the gopher. "Oh, REALLY?" He promised he would quietly spread the word to the other teachers.
I couldn't stand it, and showed up for lunch. DH was there with all those good ol' boys, who not surprisingly all stayed to eat there that day, and they were trying to look natural (looking at hunting magazines, knife catalogs and eating) as they waited.
Paymeister was talking as he opened the bag, and then words failed him. "It looks like... it IS" and pulled the gopher on a stick out of the bag. The other teachers exploded into laughter at the look on Paymeister's face and the "lunch" in his hand.
He was kind enough to take me out for tacos that lunch period. As we walked out the door the other teachers were discussing the "lunch" and all agreed I should have field dressed it first...