Mall Ninja (for the newbies)

[Tally XD]

The Mall Ninja is easily distinguished by an abundance of “tactical” gear, such as fatigues, a thigh holster (with, of course, a Glock), combat boots, bandolier and other accouterments that you’d usually only see on a SWAT operative. Median age is usually 19-25, and they tend to boast about their various exploits with certain Special Forces units, all of which they’re too young and idiotic to have joined (real Special Forces types don’t brag). They typically have opinions on everything, regardless of expertise, they are uniformly poor shots, and they tend to exhibit a frightening lack of safety training.

The shadowy and shrill figure known as Gecko45 is the holy Dalai Lama of these dolts, but trust me, there are more. Many, many more.

Anyhow, I went looking for the original GlockTalk thread, and I found that it’s no longer archived. For a time, it was mirrored at mallninja.com, but sadly, the site is now down. Luckily, I had a copy of the thread cached (as well as a great one from the HK91 forum), so I figured I’d post it here. I’ve only kept Gecko’s posts (with one hilarious exception), since I don’t have permission from the folks who responded to him, but needless to say, he got grilled. A few folks even played along to get a rise out of him.

. . . . more

[DefensiveCarry.com]

[ErikGr7]

Gecko45 writes:

hello friends,

Last year I made the decision to trust my life on the street to Second Chance body armor.

LOL

[farronwolf]

Wow, there is some really good stuff in there. I am going to have to save that link and re read it. Lots of tactical info to learn from. Too bad I missed it when he was still allowed to post.

[bonehead]

When I have the time, I'm gonna read that ENTIRE link. But this little tidbit caught my eye. Maybe if I read the context of this remark, it may make more sense....eh, probably not.

"BTW A one time experiementation while in the military, does not make one a homosexual."

What?!?!?!?!

[GWRedDragon]

The best part is where he describes the missiles he has on his golf cart.

[bandit383]

"BTW A one time experiementation while in the military, does not make one a homosexual."

What?!?!?!?!

Have to chuckle...I heard it another way..."if you only tried it once, it doesn't count".

Rick

[jcaramis]

The phrase we use is "its not gay if its underway"


ewwwwww.

[AMV]

WOW!!! That just made my weekend! Funny-Funny-Funny!!!

[AMV]

The best part is where he describes the missiles he has on his golf cart.

Don't you mean his "humGee"?

[C9H13NO3]

Oh man that site is makin me laugh all over again. I had almost forgotten how hillarious the Gecko45 episode was. I don't think the guy was serious though...he's probably also a legend in the gang of internet trolls just looking to get a rise out of someone.

[rottkeeper]

Gecko45; "When my wife picks me up from work"

You mean a man of this caliber can't drive?

[Barbary]

How did I miss this guy on here? I went back read and the attachment about his posts. I laughed so hard I cried. Thank you for clearing up what a mall ninja is. Priceless.

[Tyler11B]

theres no way this guy was serious...was he?

[ErikGr7]

Well I read the whole page. It was a good laugh.

[Dal1Celt]

Oh my God! Is there no hope for the gene pool? Please tell me that this guy is Sterile! I truely had to stop at about the halyway mark as I was about to gouge my own eyes out to stop the pain.

Hopefully daddy caught him on the computer and spanked him and sent him to bed!