Annual Senior Citizen test...

Annual Senior Citizen Test...

This is a discussion on Annual Senior Citizen Test... within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Exercise of the brain is as important as exercise of the muscles. As we grow older, it's important to keep mentally alert. If you don't ...

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Thread: Annual Senior Citizen test...

  1. #1
    VIP Member Array Sheldon J's Avatar
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    Dec 2004
    Battle Creek, Mi.

    Wink Annual Senior Citizen test...

    Exercise of the brain is as important as exercise of the muscles. As we grow older, it's important to keep mentally alert. If you don't use it, you lose it! Below is a very private way to gauge your loss or non-loss of intelligence.

    Take the test presented here to determine if you're losing it or not. The spaces below are so you don't see the answers until you've made your answer.

    OK, relax, clear your mind and begin.


    1. What do you put in a toaster?

    Answer: 'bread.' If you said 'toast,' give up now and do something else.

    Try not to hurt yourself. If you said, bread, go to Question 2.

    2. Say 'silk' five times. Now spell 'silk.' What do cows drink?

    Answer: Cows drink water. If you said 'milk,' don't attempt the next question. Your brain is over-stressed and may even overheat. Content yourself with reading a more appropriate literature such as Auto World. However, if you said 'water', proceed to question 3

    3. If a red house is made from red bricks and a blue house is made from blue bricks and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black house is made from black bricks, what is a green house made from?

    Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass. If you said 'green bricks,' why the hell are you still reading these???

    If you said 'glass,' go on to Question 4

    4. It's twenty years ago, and a plane is flying at 20,000 feet over Germany (If you will recall, Germany at the time was politically divided into West Germany and East Germany .) Anyway, during the flight, two engines fail. The pilot, realizing that the last remaining engine is also failing, decides on a crash landing procedure. Unfortunately the engine fails before he can do so and the plane fatally crashes smack in the middle of 'no man's land' between East Germany and West Germany . Where would you bury the survivors? East Germany, West Germany , or no man's land'?

    Answer: You don't bury survivors.

    If you said ANYTHING else, you're a dunce and you must stop. If you said, 'You don't bury survivors', proceed to the next question.

    5. Without using a calculator - You are driving a bus from London to Milford Haven in Wales . In London , 17 people get on the bus. In Reading , six people get off the bus and nine people get on. In Swindon , two people get off and four get on. In Cardiff , 1 1 people get off and 16 people get on. In Swansea , three people get off and five people get on . In Carmathen, six people get off and three get on. You then arrive at Milford Haven.

    What was the name of t he bus driver?

    Answer: Oh, for crying out loud!

    Don't you re member your own name? It was YOU!!

    PS: 95% of people fail most of the questions!!
    "The sword dose not cause the murder, and the maker of the sword dose not bear sin" Rabbi Solomon ben Isaac 11th century

  2. #2
    Ex Member Array Beretta92FS's Avatar
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    Aug 2006

  3. #3
    Distinguished Member Array C9H13NO3's Avatar
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    Nov 2007
    I passed! I hadn't seen the greenhouse one before and it almost got me...but I thought about it for a sec before answering. Nice.

    All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.

  4. #4
    VIP Member Array Paco's Avatar
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    Mar 2008
    McKinney, TX
    The cow one almost tripped me up, pretty funny stuff.

    I needed this today, work sucks and we just found out we are getting some of our benies cut so I needed a good laugh.
    "Don't hit a man if you can possibly avoid it; but if you do hit him, put him to sleep." - Theodore Roosevelt


  5. #5
    Senior Member Array Cthulhu's Avatar
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    Feb 2008
    Brevard County, FL
    I got them all correct except the last one. D'oh!


  6. #6
    Member Array auburn4's Avatar
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    Jun 2006
    upstate S.C.
    Great: I FLUNKED. It is so nice to have some HUMOR once in awhile. THANKS

  7. #7
    VIP Member
    Array Hopyard's Avatar
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    Jun 2006
    Got 'em all except the cow. Of course calves drink milk.

  8. #8
    Distinguished Member Array pcon's Avatar
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    Nov 2008
    San Angelo, Texas
    Quote Originally Posted by Sheldon J View Post
    what is a green house made from?
    you put a space between green and house...that's totally different than a greenhouse
    Μολὼν λαβέ

    memento mori

  9. #9
    Senior Moderator
    Array Rock and Glock's Avatar
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    Nov 2005
    404 Page Not Found
    I love getting older! LOL
    ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒΕ: Buy These Stickers Here

    "A man without ethics is a wild beast loosed upon the world" Albert Camus

  10. #10
    VIP Member Array raevan's Avatar
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    Oct 2005
    I am so senile I forgot what I was doing and had to go back to the instructions.

  11. #11
    VIP Member Array rottkeeper's Avatar
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    Jul 2008
    Upstate New York
    Tell me again what was the bus drivers name?
    For as the lightning comes from the east and flashes to the west, so also will the coming of the son of man be. Mathew 24:27

    NRA Member

  12. #12
    Member Array OldFatMan's Avatar
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    Sep 2008
    That's mean. Why you gotta mess with us? Don't you think we got enough to worry about just getting to the bathroom on time?
    I don't carry a gun because I feel inadequate.

    I carry a gun because unarmed and facing three armed thugs, I am inadequate.

  13. #13
    VIP Member Array ron8903's Avatar
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    Sep 2005
    South Florida
    I passed
    "A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on."
    - Sir Winston Churchill

  14. #14
    VIP Member Array Yoda's Avatar
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    Apr 2008
    East Texas
    I know I am getting older when my indication that it is time to go to the barber for a haircut is; the hair in my ears is too long.
    Yoda, I am, yes.

  15. #15
    VIP Member Array ccw9mm's Avatar
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    Jul 2006
    Quote Originally Posted by pcon View Post
    you put a space between green and house...that's totally different than a greenhouse

    And, while a greenhouse might well have glass, many designs don't. Even the green ones.
    Your best weapon is your brain. Don't leave home without it.
    Thoughts: Justifiable self defense (A.O.J.).
    Explain: How does disarming victims reduce the number of victims?
    Reason over Force: Why the Gun is Civilization (Marko Kloos).

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