Old Man Joke

This is a discussion on Old Man Joke within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; An old man is talking to his son that is visiting him in the nursing home. His son asks how are you doing dad, the ...

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Thread: Old Man Joke

  1. #1
    VIP Member Array rottkeeper's Avatar
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    Old Man Joke

    An old man is talking to his son that is visiting him in the nursing home.
    His son asks how are you doing dad, the old man says pretty good but I could be better. The son, concerned says how could you be better dad?
    The old man says well son things are to routine around here, like every morning I pee at 6:30am and every morning I poop at 7am. The son says what the problem I wish I was that regular, the old man say whats the problem you ask? I don't get out of bed until 8am.
    For as the lightning comes from the east and flashes to the west, so also will the coming of the son of man be. Mathew 24:27

    NRA Member

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    Distinguished Member Array SonofASniper's Avatar
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    All too true I am afraid. I had to explain to my father in-law today what my wife and I being part of the "Oreo" generation meant. He started laughing and said he hoped I was stocking up on depends.
    I will support gun control when you can guarantee all guns are removed from this planet. That includes military and law enforcement. When you can accomplish that, then I will be the last person to lay down my gun. Then I will carry the weapon that replaces the gun.

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    VIP Member Array deadeye72's Avatar
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    That's too funny. I almost hope I don't live long enough to get in that shape.
    Glock 27
    BENELLI NOVA

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    Member Array Skysoldier's Avatar
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    The so called "Golden Years" suck

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    Senior Member Array gilraen's Avatar
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    Old age is not for the cowardly, that's for sure.
    "I pledge allegiance to the war banner of the united states of Totalitaria. And to the Republic, which no longer stands, several bankers, who are now god, indivisible, with Bernanke bucks and credit for all."

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    VIP Member Array HKinNY's Avatar
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    Never understood why people in their 80 do not do more skydiving,what do you have to lose at that age?

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    VIP Member Array HKinNY's Avatar
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    The good thing about Alzheimers is that you get to meet all new people everyday.

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    Quote Originally Posted by HITCH KING View Post
    The good thing about Alzheimers is that you get to meet all new people everyday.
    And you can hide your own easter eggs!

    No snarky comments please, my Dad has it.
    CCW permit holder for Idaho, Utah, Pennsylvania, Maine and New Hampshire. I can carry in your country but not my own.

  10. #9
    Ex Member Array quantum36's Avatar
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    Reminds me of the story I heard on radio.

    A doctor visited her older patient in the hospital, who fell and broke her hip. The doctor asked the patient how things were going, etc. She then asked her if she enjoyed her breakfast that morning.

    The patient responded "Everything was fine, except I didn't quite like that Kentucky jelly. I tried a little on my toast, and just didn't taste very good".

    The doctor then looked down on her breakfast tray and saw an opened packet of "KY-Jelly".

  11. #10
    Senior Member Array community's Avatar
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    getting old sucks. i know, i am getting old.

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    VIP Member Array rottkeeper's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by community View Post
    getting old sucks. i know, i am getting old.
    Getting old sure beats the alternative.
    For as the lightning comes from the east and flashes to the west, so also will the coming of the son of man be. Mathew 24:27

    NRA Member

  13. #12
    VIP Member Array HKinNY's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rottkeeper View Post
    Getting old sure beats the alternative.
    Any day above ground is a good day!!

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    Distinguished Member Array P7fanatic's Avatar
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    Sick, sick, sick.
    "The price of freedom is eternal vigilance." -Thomas Jefferson

    "Liberalism is a Mental Disorder." -Michael Savage

    GOOD Gun Control is being able to hit your target! -Myself

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    VIP Member Array HKinNY's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rottkeeper View Post
    Getting old sure beats the alternative.
    Any day above ground is a good day!!

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    VIP Member Array Dal1Celt's Avatar
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    Any day that I wake up breathing is a good day, in my book.
    "Without fear there can be no Courage!"

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