World's Biggest whoppers & Tall Tales
This is a discussion on World's Biggest whoppers & Tall Tales within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; While huntin', Granpa spied a large buck deer in a thicket on the opposite side of the creek, so he eased down the muddy creek ...
May 1st, 2009 04:32 AM
World's Biggest whoppers & Tall Tales
While huntin', Granpa spied a large buck deer in a thicket on the opposite side of the creek, so he eased down the muddy creek bank to try to sneak a little closer for a better angle with his old double barrel. As his luck would have it though, he slipped, losing his balance and started to fall. Not wanting mud on his 12ga, he gave it a pitch toward the other side as he went down. Water just deep enough to go under, he came up fightin', trying to regain a foothold on the slippery rocks underneath. As he scrambled to get up, he heard the double barrel go off, as it had landed on the buttstock, killing two ducks that happened to be flying overhead. Still on hands and knees he clawed his way up the bank and out of the cold water, and to his surprise had a beaver in one hand and a snappin' turtle by the tail in the other. He hit the beaver in the head with the turtle, and threw both of them onto the creek bank. As he climbed onto the grassy bank exhausted, his bibbed overall pockets were pouring out water. He reached to check for his pocketwatch and pulled a bass out of one pocket, and a perch flipped out of the other. With all the splashin and beatin, the buck just up and ran off. Dumb luck! lol !!!
May 1st, 2009 09:33 AM
I took my HK 45, Beretta PX4 Storm .40 and Kimber 1911
to the pawn shop this morning and traded them for a
Hi Point c9 as I think the 9mm is the best man stopper
out there...plus Hi Points small/sleak design is good for
The shop owner almost wouldn't trade so, I had to twist
his arm a bit to get the deal to go through.
Took the c9 to the range and had several people come
over to ask me what I was shooting. Several asked to
squeeze off a few rounds but, I was un-willing to let anyone
touch my American made craftmanship.
Fired 1,000 rounds with no stove-pipes or problems.
I think my nose just grew about a foot
May 1st, 2009 09:49 AM
I went to WW this morning and they had all the ammo I could want and even enough for the next guy in line behind me.
"I didn't do it, nobody saw me do it, you can't prove anything!" Bart Simpson
May 1st, 2009 10:34 AM
CNN Headline News : Washington, DC
Ban on weapons in all places lifted!
No permits are required to carry any weapon, anywhere. Liberals are all excited about passing this new piece of legislation. Republicans side with Democrats, helping get this into law. Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi was quoted saying, "This is the most important thing the Obama Administration has done since the Simulus Package."
Lawmakers have given the 2nd Amendment plenty of ammo and gives warning to any and all criminals that people can now protect themselves anywhere in the United States. This is bad news for the Brady Campaign, they have closed down their offices and are no longer in business.
Last edited by JoJoGunn; May 1st, 2009 at 10:35 AM.
Reason: add more
"A Smith & Wesson always beats 4 aces!"
The Man Prayer. "Im a man, I can change, if I have to.....I guess!" ~ Red Green
May 1st, 2009 10:38 AM
The trees are sooo tall here, that when we go squirrel hunting, we have to put salt in with the buckshot to keep the meat from spoiling on the loooong fall from the top of the tree!
May 1st, 2009 11:03 AM
Zombie's have invaded and are taking over..people are unable
to withstand the horde with the recent ammo tax of 500% and
assualt weapons, hi-cap handgun bans.
It is reported that several are trying to defend their ground with
single shot rifles and shotguns.
May 1st, 2009 11:26 AM
"Honest, Mom, I wasn't drivin' fast. That stupid woman stomped on her brakes, and I couldn't get out of the way in time! It's all her fault!"
"I pledge allegiance to the war banner of the united states of Totalitaria. And to the Republic, which no longer stands, several bankers, who are now god, indivisible, with Bernanke bucks and credit for all."
May 1st, 2009 11:46 AM
I saw the Pope naked.
Well, I was taking a shower in the third floor aprtment in NY when his motorcade came by, and my wife yelled out "Here comes the Pope!"
So I ran to the window, (naked) and saw him.
"Don't be afraid to see what you see.
May 1st, 2009 12:18 PM
I am from the government and I am here to help you.
This will hurt me more than it hurts you.
It tastes like chicken.
This new computer system will make your job so much easier!
Infowars- Proving David Hannum right on a daily basis
May 1st, 2009 01:15 PM
Top five news stories for the day.
1 Hillery Clinton to be on cover of Sports Illustrated
2 Janet Napolitino throws huge welcome home party for returning soldiers.
3 Joe Biden makes intelligent statement to media concerning H1N1 virus.
4 New York State politicians wake up and smell the roses.
5 Osama Bin Laden converts to Christianity.
For as the lightning comes from the east and flashes to the west, so also will the coming of the son of man be. Mathew 24:27
May 1st, 2009 02:02 PM
It's only a cold sore, HONEST!
Sarah Brady is the new President of the NRA.
"The natural progress of things is for liberty to yield, and government to gain ground."
- Thomas Jefferson
"I'm the arrow, you're my bow, shoot me forth and I will go"
"Do not let any individual posts put a knot in your Big Boy Under-Roos"
May 1st, 2009 03:18 PM
al gore denies global warming
When you have to shoot, shoot. Don't talk.
"Don't forget, incoming fire has the right of way."
May 1st, 2009 03:26 PM
President Obama, admits he was born in Kenya and resigns .
Nancy Pelosi takes over as POTUS, while Joe Biden says. "Wait a sec." Nancy tells Joe he was wrong about the duties of the Vice president when bashing Dick Cheney, and he is wrong now.
Joe says "Yes your Majesty" .
May 1st, 2009 03:39 PM
No more fighting is Isreal or the middle east.
Goverment figures out how to make health care affordable to all
Car manfactures and bank return all off the bail out money to the people
May 1st, 2009 03:53 PM
I havenít heard any of the journalists who volunteered to be waterboarded asking to have their fingernails wrenched out with pliers, or electrodes attached to their genitals.
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