I am emailing now.
This is a discussion on Where are the Americans.... within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; A Russian arrives in New York City as a new immigrant to the United States. He stops the first person he sees walking down the ...
A Russian arrives in New York City as a new immigrant to the United States. He stops the first person he sees walking down the street and says, "Thank you, Mr. American, for letting me into this country, giving me housing, food stamps, free medical care, and a free education!"
The passerby says, "You are mistaken, I am a Mexican."
The man goes on and encounters another passerby. "Thank you for having such a beautiful country here in America ."
The person says, "I not American, I Vietnamese."
The new arrival walks farther, and the next person he sees he stops, shakes his hand, and says, "Thank you for wonderful America !"
That person puts up his hand and says, "I am from Middle East. I am not American."
He finally sees a nice lady and asks, "Are you an American?" She says, "No, I am from Africa .." Puzzled, he asks her, "Where are all the Americans?"
The African lady checks her watch and says, "Probably at work."
IF YOU DON'T PASS THIS ON TO YOUR FRIENDS, TOMORROW
AT 11:30 AM YOU WILL RECEIVE THREE ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS
"The sword dose not cause the murder, and the maker of the sword dose not bear sin" Rabbi Solomon ben Isaac 11th century
This works north of the 49th parallel too. Just substitute "Canadian" for "American", and Toronto for New York.
CCW permit holder for Idaho, Utah, Pennsylvania, Maine and New Hampshire. I can carry in your country but not my own.
Then the poor Russian immigrant sees a bumper sticker that reads;
Work Harder, Millions on Welfare are Depending on YOU!"
As the sad realization of it all sinks in he thinks to himself this country is becoming just like my Motherland.
While people are saying "Peace and safety," destruction will come on them suddenly, ... and they will not escape. 1Th 5:3
"Anyone worth shooting, is probably worth shooting several times."
Well played Sheldon J....well played...
My wife particularly liked it when I used different stereotypical accents to tell her the joke.