Jack Bauer is all powerful (24)

Jack Bauer is all powerful (24)

This is a discussion on Jack Bauer is all powerful (24) within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Top Thirty Facts If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd ...

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Thread: Jack Bauer is all powerful (24)

  1. #1
    Member Array Mr_Dove's Avatar
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    Jack Bauer is all powerful (24)

    Top Thirty Facts

    If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and
    Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd
    shoot Nina twice.

    If you wake up in the morning, it's because Jack Bauer
    spared your life.

    Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland,
    Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played
    by no man.

    Superman wears Jack Bauer pajamas.

    Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then
    spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he
    gave up the location of the keys.

    Osama bin Laden's recent proposal for truce is a
    direct result of him finding out that Jack Bauer is,
    in fact, still alive.

    Lets get one thing straight, the only reason you are
    conscious right now is because Jack Bauer does not
    feel like carrying you.

    Jack Bauer played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded
    gun and won

    Jack Bauer was never addicted to heroin. Heroin was
    addicted to Jack Bauer.

    Jack Bauer is the leading cause of death in Middle
    Eastern men.

    1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Jack Bauer. Sounds
    like a fair fight.

    Jack Bauers calender goes from March 31st to April
    2nd, no one fools Jack Bauer.

    When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill
    terrorists. Jack Bauer ????ing hates lemonade.

    You can lead a horse to water. Jack Bauer can make him
    drink.

    Jack Bauer doesn't miss. If he didn't hit you it's
    because he was shooting at another terrorist twelve
    miles away.

    Jack Bauer can get McDonald's breakfast after 10:30.

    Jack Bauer killed 93 people in just 4 days time. Wait,
    that is a real fact.

    Jack Bauer once won a game of Connect 4 in 3 moves

    Jack Bauer's favorite color is severe terror alert
    red. His second favorite color is violet, but just
    because it sounds like violent.

    When you open a can of whoop-ass, Jack Bauer jumps
    out.

    Killing Jack Bauer doesn't make him dead. It just
    makes him angry.

    Simon Says should be renamed to Jack Bauer Says
    because if Jack Bauer says something then you better
    ????ing do it.

    When Jack Bauer watches a pot, it boils immediately.

    Every time you ********** Jack Bauer kills a
    terrorist. Not beacuase you masurbated, but because
    that is how often he kills terrorists.

    When Google can't find something, it asks Jack Bauer
    for help.

    In 96 hours, Jack Bauer has killed 93 people and saved
    the world 4 times. What the ???? have you done with
    your life?

    Jack Bauer got Hellen Keller to talk.

    When the boogie man goes to sleep, he checks his
    closet for Jack Bauer.

    Jack Bauer can hit two birds with no stones.

    Jack Bauer loves reality TV. That's why he allows FOX
    to follow him around.


  2. #2
    Administrative Ban Array Bruces45's Avatar
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    That was funny stuff, reminded me of the Chuck Norris ones.

  3. #3
    Member Array HighVelocity's Avatar
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    When you open a can of whoop-ass, Jack Bauer jumps
    out.
    I always wondered what was in that can.

  4. #4
    VIP Member Array Bud White's Avatar
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    yep seen those funny though

  5. #5
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    Yep, He is da man he carries an H&K..


  6. #6
    Senior Member Array czman2006's Avatar
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    I've GOT to start watching this show! Only show I make an effort to watch is House. Time to hit the TV Guide!
    "Let not your heart be troubled." John 14:1

    USN Retired Vietnam/Desert Shield/Desert Storm

  7. #7
    Member Array HighVelocity's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Landor
    Yep, He is da man he carries an H&K..

    Yep, and he has his finger on the trigger.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by czman2006
    I've GOT to start watching this show! Only show I make an effort to watch is House. Time to hit the TV Guide!
    Although you would be completely addicted to the best show on TV with only one episode, cz, be aware that 1/2 of the season has already gone by....lots of story, character developement, etc. will be missed.

    If I might make a suggestion that would increase your viewing pleasure, try to rent Season 2 of '24' to start with and work your way up through the different seasons (we are 1/2 way through season 5 right now). Season 1 was just so-so IMHO

    Each season stands alone, but they all tie together in the long run...you might get more bang for the buck starting with the early stuff and going forward.

    Rick
    "I surrounded 'em"- Alvin York

    "They're ain't many troubles that a man can't fix with seven hundred dollars and a thirty ought six"- Jeff Cooper

  9. #9
    Senior Member Array czman2006's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Team American
    Although you would be completely addicted to the best show on TV with only one episode, cz, be aware that 1/2 of the season has already gone by....lots of story, character developement, etc. will be missed.

    If I might make a suggestion that would increase your viewing pleasure, try to rent Season 2 of '24' to start with and work your way up through the different seasons (we are 1/2 way through season 5 right now). Season 1 was just so-so IMHO

    Each season stands alone, but they all tie together in the long run...you might get more bang for the buck starting with the early stuff and going forward.

    Rick
    Thanks! That's what I'll do. A 24 newbie fan!
    "Let not your heart be troubled." John 14:1

    USN Retired Vietnam/Desert Shield/Desert Storm

  10. #10
    Member Array Hagphish's Avatar
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    WOW. I totally disagree about season one. I quit watching after season 3 because it got too predictible (really, it was predictible after the first episode). But, if you are going to start from past seasons, start from the beggining. Season one is the best season IMHO.
    I'm married to my Kahr.

  11. #11
    Senior Member Array '75scout's Avatar
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    This post made me want to start watching it. I haven't even seen a single episode. Luckily my fiance's parents have seasons 1-2 and I'll watch them over spring break.

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hagphish
    But, if you are going to start from past seasons, start from the beggining. Season one is the best season IMHO.
    You're probably right, Hagphish...a '24' beginner maybe should start at the very first season (I remember that the very first episode of Season1 was a jaw-dropper! ) The Nina Meyers storyline was pretty darn important, too. And I agree with you about Season 3 being a tad predictable. I didn't get to see Season 1 until last year on DVD.

    I got hooked halfway through Season 2 (my favorite, so far), and thought that Season 4 was very good...Season 5 is shaping up nicely, with some interesting developments last Monday
    "I surrounded 'em"- Alvin York

    "They're ain't many troubles that a man can't fix with seven hundred dollars and a thirty ought six"- Jeff Cooper

  13. #13
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    This season makes you wonder which cast regular is gonna get their's next?

    Anybody up for a poll?
    USAF: Loving Our Obscene Amenities Since 1947

  14. #14
    Distinguished Member Array BCurry1's Avatar
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    One thing I have found, if you watch the show with someone who has never seen it before, tape it so you can watch it again. You will spend the entire show explaining, "Why did he do that, Who's that, and What's he talking about?"

    24 is my favorite show, I own all 4 seasons. If I was new to the show, I would seriously start at the beginning watching from season 1. If you do not want to drop the $30-$50 on a season, I saw a couple of weeks ago that block buster now rents seasons 1 - 4. For anyone who has never seen the show, if you watch one episode, you will truly be hooked.

    Quote Originally Posted by Hagphish
    WOW. I totally disagree about season one. I quit watching after season 3 because it got too predictible (really, it was predictible after the first episode).
    The FBI should hire you!!
    Curry

  15. #15
    Senior Member Array dpesec's Avatar
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    LOL, well I predicted the story line of this week's show. I told my GF what would happen and she was shocked as it unfolded.
    Dave

    “The highest obligation and privilege of citizenship is that of bearing arms”. General George Patton—US Army

    Vis et Veneratio

    "So this is how democracy dies: to thunderous applause." Actress Natalie Portman as Padme in Star Wars Revenge of the Sith

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