Murphy's Laws of Combat

This is a discussion on Murphy's Laws of Combat within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; I saw this the other day and found it very funny.(because of the truth of them) If the enemy is in range, so are you. ...

Results 1 to 7 of 7

Thread: Murphy's Laws of Combat

  1. #1
    Senior Member Array tbrenke's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Phoenix, AZ
    Posts
    1,006

    Cool Murphy's Laws of Combat

    I saw this the other day and found it very funny.(because of the truth of them)

    If the enemy is in range, so are you. Incoming fire has the right of way.
    Automatic weapons --aren't.
    Suppressive fire -- won't.
    Don't look conspicuous, it draws fire.
    There is always a way.
    When in doubt, empty the magazine.
    Teamwork is essential. It gives them someone else to shoot at
    No combat ready unit ever passed inspection.
    No inspection ready unit ever passed combat.
    The easy way is always mined.
    Beer math: two beers times 37 men equal 49 cases.
    Body count math: two guerillas plus one portable plus two pigs equal 37 enemy KIA.
    Things that must be together to work usually can't be shipped together.
    Radios will fail as soon as you need fire support desperately.
    Anything you do can get you shot, including doing nothing.
    Tracers work both ways.
    Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo.
    Professionals are predictable, it's the amateurs that are dangerous.
    The enemy invariably attacks on two occasions: (a) when you're ready for them and (b) when you're not ready for them.
    Teamwork is essential, it gives them someone else to shoot at.
    If you can't remember, then the claymore is pointed at you.
    The important things are always simple.
    The simple things are always hard.
    The enemy diversion you have been ignoring will be the main attack.
    A "sucking chest wound" is nature's way of telling you to slow down.
    If your attack is going well, you have walked into an ambush.
    Never draw fire, it irritates everyone around you.
    Anything you do can get you shot, including nothing.
    Make it tough enough for the enemy to get in and you won't be able to get out.
    Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than yourself.
    All 5-second grenade fuses will burn out in 3.
    If you're short of everything but the enemy, you're in a combat zone.
    When you have secured an area, don't forget to tell the enemy.
    Never forget that your weapon is made by the lowest bidder.
    If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will have more than your fair share of objectives to take.
    When both sides are convinced that they are about to lose, they are both right.
    Professional soldiers are predictable, but the world is full of amateurs.
    Murphy was a grunt.
    "I cannot undertake to lay my finger on that article of the Constitution, which granted a right to Congress of expending, on objects of benevolence, the money of their constituents." -1792, James Madison
    There are always too many Democratic, Republican and never enough U.S. congressmen.

  2. Remove Ads

  3. #2
    Member Array mutumbo's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    florida
    Posts
    115
    Quote Originally Posted by tbrenke View Post
    I saw this the other day and found it very funny.(because of the truth of them)

    Never forget that your weapon is made by the lowest bidder.
    this one made me laugh, HARD.

    its funny because its true, sadly

  4. #3
    Distinguished Member Array Bunny's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    North Carolina - LKN
    Posts
    1,384
    Quote Originally Posted by tbrenke View Post
    When in doubt, empty the magazine.
    Words of wisdom!
    Don't frisk me, I am the weapon.


    Sig Sauer P239 DAK (9mm)
    NRA Member & Pistol Instructor

    www.vanguardnc.com

  5. #4
    VIP Member Array Paco's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    McKinney, TX
    Posts
    3,499
    "Tracers work both ways" is a favorite of mine.
    "Don't hit a man if you can possibly avoid it; but if you do hit him, put him to sleep." - Theodore Roosevelt

    -Paco
    http://www.shieldsd.net

  6. #5
    VIP Member
    Array DaveH's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    SW Virginia
    Posts
    5,036
    Quote Originally Posted by mutumbo View Post

    Originally Posted by tbrenke

    Never forget that your weapon is made by the lowest bidder.
    this one made me laugh, HARD.

    its funny because its true, sadly

    That and

    If you're short of everything but the enemy, you're in a combat zone.
    and

    Things that must be together to work usually can't be shipped together.
    Μολὼν λαβέ

    I'm just one root in a grassroots organization. No one should assume that I speak for the VCDL.

    I am neither an attorney-at-law nor I do play one on television or on the internet. No one should assumes my opinion is legal advice.

    Veni, Vidi, Velcro

  7. #6
    Member Array CRags99's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Location
    Benton, KY
    Posts
    478
    Good stuff! Thanks for the post!
    Glock 27

    "Criminals are a cowardly and superstitious lot."

  8. #7
    VIP Member
    Array ccman's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    CT, USA
    Posts
    2,020
    O'so true. Murphy is at it again.

Links

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

Similar Threads

  1. Murphy's law may apply
    By ayce2 in forum Off Topic & Humor Discussion
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: July 8th, 2009, 01:49 PM
  2. Murphy's Lesser Laws
    By ppkheat in forum Off Topic & Humor Discussion
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: February 29th, 2008, 01:52 PM
  3. Murphy's Other Laws
    By Captain Crunch in forum Off Topic & Humor Discussion
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: August 4th, 2006, 12:07 AM
  4. Murphy's Other Laws
    By 4my son in forum Off Topic & Humor Discussion
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: June 19th, 2006, 10:29 PM
  5. Murphy - and the weather!
    By P95Carry in forum Off Topic & Humor Discussion
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: January 14th, 2006, 08:27 PM