How to call police when you are old

How to call police when you are old

This is a discussion on How to call police when you are old within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; HOW TO CALL THE POLICE WHEN YOU'RE OLD AND DON'T MOVE FAST ANYMORE. George Phillips , an elderly man, from Meridian, Mississippi, was going up ...

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Thread: How to call police when you are old

  1. #1
    Distinguished Member Array mr.stuart's Avatar
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    How to call police when you are old

    HOW TO CALL THE POLICE
    WHEN YOU'RE OLD
    AND DON'T MOVE FAST ANYMORE.

    George Phillips , an elderly man, from Meridian, Mississippi, was going up to bed, when his wife told him that he'd left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window. George opened the back door to go turn off the light, but saw that there were people in the shed stealing things.

    He phoned the police, who asked "Is someone in your house?"

    He said "No," but some people are breaking into my garden shed and stealing from me.

    Then the police dispatcher said "All patrols are busy. You should lock your doors and an officer will be along when one is available."

    George said, "Okay."

    He hung up the phone and counted to 30.

    Then he phoned the police again.

    "Hello, I just called you a few seconds ago because there were people stealing things from my shed. Well, you don't have to worry about them now because I just shot them." and he hung up.

    Within five minutes, six Police Cars, a SWAT Team, a Helicopter, two Fire Trucks, a Paramedic, and an Ambulance showed up at the Phillips' residence, and caught the burglars red-handed.

    One of the Policemen said to George, "I thought you said that you'd shot them!"

    George said, "I thought you said there was nobody available!"

    (True Story) I LOVE IT!
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    Live well, laugh often, love much


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    VIP Member Array Dal1Celt's Avatar
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    Oldie, but a Goodie!
    "Without fear there can be no Courage!"

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    Yes, a , but it's been a long time...others should enjoy!
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    Distinguished Member Array Bunny's Avatar
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    love it!
    Don't frisk me, I am the weapon.


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    New Member Array hillbilly510's Avatar
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    this storr never gets old. my wife said it reminded her of me

  6. #6
    VIP Member Array JoJoGunn's Avatar
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    Funny one! I have a true event, not blaming police officers, I have a good friend who is one but this actually happend, I know, I was involved somewhat.

    I was visiting my grandparents one day. The looney neighbor across the road from my grandparents came out yelling and screaming at me then he hit the trunk deck of my car with a sledge hammer as I backed out of their driveway. He ran back inside his house. I called the cops but they told me since the indident had already happend, they couldn't come out. Then my grandfather and grandmother related the rest of this story the next day.

    The next day, the looney neighbor came across the road, entered the front door of the house, sledge hammer in hand. My grandfather was out in the side yard and heard my Grandmother yelling, "So and So.....what are you doing?' followed by a crashing sound. Fearing that my grandmother had been assaulted, he went round the house, came in the front door and confronted the neighbor standing in the living room, sledge hammer in hand, my grandmother was nowhere to be seen. Fearing the worst, my grandfather grabs "my" loaded, round in the chamber bolt action .22 rifle. (He had borrowed it for some reason I cannot recall) that was just behind the door. The neighbor took one step towards my grand father so he pointed the gun, pulled the trigger. It went "click". So he swung the rifle like a baseball bat, catching the nut case right upside his fool head. He dropped the sledge hammer and ran out the door past my grandfather. Apparently the cartridge was bad or the firing pin was a bit rusty and didn't hit the cartridge soundly. Lucky for the neighbor.

    My grandmother was unhurt. The nut job ran past her as she sat on the couch, went into the kitchen and smashed their dinner table. She had followed the neighbor into the kitchen, saw him do it and watched him run for the front door. Unfortunately, confronting my PO'ed grandfather as he came in the front door and did not see my grandmother.

    He called the cops, told them what happend. The dispatcher replied that all units were busy, so with out a stopping my grandfather told them, "Just send the undertaker, because I'm taking this rifle, going across the street and shooting the SOB.!!!" You had to know my grandfather, if he said he's doing it, then he is.

    In less than 5 minutes not one, but THREE police cars arrived on the scene. One of them had been at the end of a road where it intersects with their street, less than one minute away. They promptly arrested the neighbor for whatever they could. Apparently the neighbor was off his medication and had gone off the chart. They did nothing to my grandfather, they saw the smashed table and the sledgehammer, plus he had told them of the incident the previous day of getting my trunk deck smacked.
    "A Smith & Wesson always beats 4 aces!"

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    VIP Member Array HKinNY's Avatar
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    Sometimes people need a good smack to clear out the cobb webbs in their head.

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    Distinguished Member Array Bunny's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by HITCH KING View Post
    Sometimes people need a good smack to clear out the cobb webbs in their head.
    Yes. Upside the head with the butt of a rifle!
    Don't frisk me, I am the weapon.


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    Member Array IronMike's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bunny View Post
    Yes. Upside the head with the butt of a rifle!
    my,my,arent we testy this week...BTW my permit took 12 whole days
    It is pardonable to be defeated but never surprised.
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    Member Array mutumbo's Avatar
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    first i would have KILLED him for hitting my car with a sledge hammer.
    it wouldnt have even gotten to the whole confrontation the second day.

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    Ex Member Array JOHNSMITH's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mutumbo View Post
    first i would have KILLED him for hitting my car with a sledge hammer.
    it wouldnt have even gotten to the whole confrontation the second day.
    Just keep in mind that in FL, if that's all you shoot him for, you're getting hauled off to the slammer. Unless he threatens you with said sledge hammer (which would probably happen)... just be careful.

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    Member Array mutumbo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by paul34 View Post
    Just keep in mind that in FL, if that's all you shoot him for, you're getting hauled off to the slammer. Unless he threatens you with said sledge hammer (which would probably happen)... just be careful.
    of course he threatend me! just ask anyone who is around and still alive. haha.

  13. #13
    VIP Member Array JoJoGunn's Avatar
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    I have thought about that event every now and then. The sledghammer-to-the-trunk-deck was on an '83 Cavalier. No great loss, kind of an improvement. There was no firearm available for me, I didn't have a permit to carry one. He never really threatened me, just came out of the house, whacked the car and booked it back inside before I could get out and rearrange his anatomy via Tae-Kwon-Do skills.

    I believe he is still institutionalized.
    "A Smith & Wesson always beats 4 aces!"

    The Man Prayer. "Im a man, I can change, if I have to.....I guess!" ~ Red Green

  14. #14
    Member Array mutumbo's Avatar
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    i dont care, my car is the biggest piece of crap on the road, but if someone hits it with a sledge hammer for ANY reason in a threatening manner they arent leaving with out a few knuckle bumps (or baseballbat bumps) on their head.

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    Thats a good one, I will have to remember that one in about 40 years. Thanks for the laugh.

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