Did not expect that one.
This is a discussion on Great joke-a must-share.... within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Pinocchio, Snow White, and Superman are out for a stroll in town one day... As they walk, they come across a sign: "Beauty contest for ...
Pinocchio, Snow White, and Superman are out for a stroll in town one day...
As they walk, they come across a sign: "Beauty contest for the most beautiful woman in the world."
"I am entering!" said Snow White.
After half an hour she comes out and they ask her, "Well, how'd you do?"
" First Place !," said Snow White.
They continue walking and they see a sign: "Contest for the strongest man in the world."
"I'm entering," says Superman.
After half an hour, he returns and they ask him, "How did you make out?"
"First Place," answers Superman. "Did you ever doubt?"
They continue walking when they see a sign: "Contest! Who is the greatest liar in the world?"
"I'm entering," says Pinocchio.
After half an hour he returns with tears in his eyes.
"What happened?" they asked.
"Who the hell is Nancy Pelosi?" asked Pinocchio.
It's Great to be a Florida Gator!
Gene Police: "Hey You! Out of the Pool!
Did not expect that one.
Preparing for the Zombie Apocalypse or Rapture....whichever comes first.
"Stand your ground, don't fire unless fired upon, but if they mean to have a war, let it begin here!" - John Parker April 19th, 1775 Lexington, MA
In all humor, there is some truth.
"I don't make jokes. I just watch the Government and report the facts" --Will Rogers
That was pretty good
"Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country,"
--Mayor Marion Barry, Washington , DC .
will you just look at this!! with Pinocchio and Snow White I thought this was going to get baned.
turns out that it may anyway but it was a very good joke.
"I cannot undertake to lay my finger on that article of the Constitution, which granted a right to Congress of expending, on objects of benevolence, the money of their constituents." -1792, James Madison
There are always too many Democratic, Republican and never enough U.S. congressmen.
banned or not... that was funny stuff!
"The gun is the great equalizer... For it is the gun, that allows the meek to repel the monsters; Whom are bigger, stronger and without conscience, prey on those who without one, would surely perish."
Got me -- from left field.
Last edited by DaveH; August 13th, 2009 at 01:50 PM.
I'm just one root in a grassroots organization. No one should assume that I speak for the VCDL.
I am neither an attorney-at-law nor I do play one on television or on the internet. No one should assumes my opinion is legal advice.
Veni, Vidi, Velcro
One day two men walk into a bar located on one of the top floors of a tall office building. They sit down and each order beer. They look to their left and see a man who is somewhat drunk.
The drunk man walks over to the two men and sits next to them. He tells them, "I'll bet you $100.00 that I can open that window over there and jump to the ground and I'll be blown back into this building through the same window." The two men are of course somewhat skeptical of his claim. But again the drunk man makes the same claim. Just to appease the man one of them agrees to give him $100.00 if he can jump from the building and get blown back into the window from which he jumped by the wind.
The three men then go to the window The drunk man proceeds to open the window, then suddenly jump out. As the drunk is about to hit the pavement, a sudden gust of wind almost magically blows the drunk back up an into the window from which he just jumped out. One of the two men give the drunk man $100.00.
The drunk says to the two men that he'll do it again for another $100.00. Still thinking that there is a "trick" to this stunt he was performing they agree. Again, the drunk man climbs out the window and jumps and just a he's about to hit the pavement, a gust of wind blows him up and back into the window of the tall building. The other man gives the drunk $100.00.
The drunk explains, "Well, you see today is a very windy & gusty day. The aerodynamics are such that it makes it possible to jump out of that window and get blown back into this building every time."
The two men walk over to the window, climb out and jump to their deaths. The bartender tells the drunk, "Superman, when you're drunk you're really an ass."
"Gun control is being able to hit your target."