Would you remarry ?

This is a discussion on Would you remarry ? within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; ---------------------------------------------------------------- A Husband and wife are sitting quietly in bed reading when the wife looks over at him and asks THE question..... WIFE: "What would ...

View Poll Results: Would you remarry again

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  • Yes, I need to have a Partner in life

    24 32.88%
  • No, I want to do what I want, when I want and sleep around

    42 57.53%
  • Become celibate

    5 6.85%
  • Being Gay is an Option

    2 2.74%
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Thread: Would you remarry ?

  1. #1
    Senior Member Array mi2az's Avatar
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    Would you remarry ?

    ----------------------------------------------------------------


    A Husband and wife are sitting quietly in bed reading when the wife looks over at him and asks THE question.....

    WIFE: "What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?

    HUSBAND: "Definitely not!"

    WIFE: "Why not? Don't you like being married?"

    HUSBAND: "Of course I do."

    WIFE: "Then why wouldn't you remarry?"

    HUSBAND: "Okay, okay, I'd get married again."

    WIFE: "You would?" (with a hurt look)

    HUSBAND: (makes audible groan)

    WIFE: "Would you live in our house?"

    HUSBAND: "Sure, it's a great house."

    WIFE: "Would you sleep with her in our bed?"

    HUSBAND: "Where else would we sleep?"



    WIFE: "Would you let her drive my car?"

    HUSBAND: "Probably, it is almost new."

    WIFE: "Would you replace my pictures with hers?"

    HUSBAND: "That would seem like the proper thing to do"

    WIFE: "Would you give her my jewelry?"

    HUSBAND: "No, I'm sure she'd want her own."

    WIFE: "Would you take her golfing with you?

    HUSBAND: "Yes, those are always good times."

    WIFE: "Would she use my clubs?

    HUSBAND: "No, she's left-handed."


    WIFE: ----- silence ------



    HUSBAND: "Crap."
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  3. #2
    Distinguished Member Array Rcher's Avatar
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    For exactly the conversation above, I cannot answer this. My wife is also a forum member and no matter what I say ... It'll be wrong. I plead the 5th.
    "Government is not the solution to our problem; government IS the problem". - Ronald Reagan 1981

  4. #3
    VIP Member Array grady's Avatar
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    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

    Now the question is will she remarry after she kills him?


    Quote Originally Posted by Rcher View Post
    For exactly the conversation above, I cannot answer this. My wife is also a forum member and no matter what I say ... It'll be wrong. I plead the 5th.
    Good idea.

    Anything you say CAN and WILL be used against you.

    (No offense, Mrs. Rcher... I'm just speaking from personal experience.)

    Excuse me now while I go run and hide. I've heard Mrs. Rcher is a very good shot.

  5. #4
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    Grady cuts to the chase once again!

    Will she remarry after she kills him?
    I love folks that are so succinct!

    And............I did not vote!

  6. #5
    Senior Member Array bbqgrill's Avatar
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    At only 46 we have had the mortality discussion and neither of us would deny the other happiness.
    "To believe that social reforms can eradicate evil altogether is to forget that evil is a protean creature, forever assuming a new shape when deprived of an old one." - SAT

    Never argue with an idiot - they'll bring you down to their level then beat you with experience.

  7. #6
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    Oh oh, mi2az is going here...

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eyduncFpzl4
    The last Blood Moon Tetrad for this millennium starts in April 2014 and ends in September 2015...according to NASA.

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  8. #7
    Senior Member Array PointnClick's Avatar
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    I just told my hunnee the other day... "No matter how grim it becomes to be your husband, I'm certain being your ex-husband would be much worse..."
    "Who is to say that I am not an instrument of karma? Indeed, who is to say that I am not the very hand of God himself, dispatched by the Almighty to smite the Philistines and hypocrites, to lay low the dishonest and corrupt, and to bust the jawbone of some jackass that so desperately deserves it?"

  9. #8
    VIP Member Array AZ Husker's Avatar
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    Next time I get the urge to get married, I'm just gonna find a woman I don't like and give her all my money.
    Treat me good, I'll treat you better. Treat me bad, I'll treat you worse.

  10. #9
    Senior Member Array Pure Kustom's Avatar
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    I believe in a Long lease with an option to buy.......................

  11. #10
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    No. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.
    "Just blame Sixto"

  12. #11
    VIP Member Array nedrgr21's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by grady View Post
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
    Anything you say CAN and WILL be used against you.
    Including saying nothing.

  13. #12
    Member Array Henmeister's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AZ Husker View Post
    Next time I get the urge to get married, I'm just gonna find a woman I don't like and give her all my money.


    You guys probably don't want to hear this from mild little Susie Homemaker (who is packing 9mm copper jacket hollow points), but I've already told DH that if I die I want him to remarry. No joke. Married men seem to do better.

    OK, back to your regular scheduled hilarity. I'm enjoying the jokes.

  14. #13
    VIP Member Array Eagleks's Avatar
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    My EX... asked me during the divorce if I would ever get remarried. My response, " I surely couldn't be that stupid twice".

    Actually, people were making bets on "how soon" I would get married again. They all lost their bets. Out of the single women I have met after being divorced, I learned there's a good reason many of them are single, and they should stay that way. I know it scared me.

    Can we say ... "gold diggers" are rampant.

  15. #14
    VIP Member Array Thanis's Avatar
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    I've told my wife she should remarry and assured her I would be looking soon after her passing.

    She "said" she was fine with that, but she did not think she would want to remarry. I asked if I ruined her for marriage because I'm a good husband or a bad husband. She said she could never love another. Nice of her to say, but I have the opposite view. Because my marriage has been so great, I can't live any other way.
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  16. #15
    Senior Member Array jca1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AZ Husker View Post
    Next time I get the urge to get married, I'm just gonna find a woman I don't like and give her all my money.

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