Your cat is fat

This is a discussion on Your cat is fat within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Boy, this just doesn't seem to be my weekend. First I kill a spider with a fly swatter. Probably voided the warranty on that. Next, ...

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Thread: Your cat is fat

  1. #1
    VIP Member Array ExactlyMyPoint's Avatar
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    Your cat is fat

    Boy, this just doesn't seem to be my weekend.

    First I kill a spider with a fly swatter. Probably voided the warranty on that. Next, I called my lady friend's cat fat. Let me tell you guys, if you think you don't call the girl fat, try calling her cat fat.

    These things usually come in threes. I fear to discover what lies in wait.
    Preparing for the Zombie Apocalypse or Rapture....whichever comes first.

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  3. #2
    VIP Member Array ccw9mm's Avatar
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    Shoot me her phone number. I'll call her.
    Your best weapon is your brain. Don't leave home without it.
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  4. #3
    Senior Member Array stanislaskasava's Avatar
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    Well... is she fat?

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    Member Array ROFL SQUAD's Avatar
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    More bounce per oz.?
    If you're going to carry one weapon, might as well carry two, because as the saying goes, "Two is one, and one is none."

    "Liberals can decline or whine, but I will still carry and conceal mine." - Cold Warrior. Excellent quote good sir!

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    She's not fat, she's pleasingly plump!

  7. #6
    VIP Member Array automatic slim's Avatar
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    You're on thin ice my friend and I hear it cracking.
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  8. #7
    VIP Member Array grady's Avatar
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    So is the cat fat?

    (I realize stanislaskasava may have asked the same thing, but I couldn't tell if he was asking about the cat or the lady friend.)

  9. #8
    VIP Member Array ExactlyMyPoint's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by grady View Post
    So is the cat fat?

    (I realize stanislaskasava may have asked the same thing, but I couldn't tell if he was asking about the cat or the lady friend.)
    Yes, the cat is fat. And that is all I am going to say on that.
    Preparing for the Zombie Apocalypse or Rapture....whichever comes first.

  10. #9
    Senior Member Array stanislaskasava's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by grady View Post
    So is the cat fat?

    (I realize stanislaskasava may have asked the same thing, but I couldn't tell if he was asking about the cat or the lady friend.)
    I was taking a wild guess that EMP touched a sensitive subject. Perhaps his lady friend secretly feels that she is fat and she took it as a subtle jab. Maybe she doesn't want to be made aware that he naturally thinks of people and animals in terms of girth.

    At least he didn't say "That's a whale of a cat you have!"

    I guess the cat's out of the bag, now... and you'll never manage to squeeze him back in.

  11. #10
    VIP Member Array paramedic70002's Avatar
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    Some people believe their animal companions (formerly: pets) grow to look like their owners.
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  12. #11
    Senior Member Array Slim_45's Avatar
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    Which really funny thought would be appropriate enough for me to say right now
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  13. #12
    Member Array Hotbrass's Avatar
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    Funny. This reminds me of when the son and I were in a pet store with our puppy. We head to the front counter and there is the biggest pitbull I have ever seen. It was a male, a blue/tan color, and about 1 1/2 yrs old.

    It laid its ears to the side and wagged its tail looking at our pup. This pitbull had to weigh more than 100#.

    You could look at the dog and tell it was a house pet. I told the lady that is the most beautiful pit I have ever seen. I said he is fat!

    She responded with, thats not nice.
    Keep your powder dry

  14. #13
    Member Array UnklFungus's Avatar
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    Ease up on the rotund Feline American. J/K!

    So she has a fat cat. I don't understand why she would get offended by that comment. Maybe you tell her you were just trying to "chew the fat?" Maybe you could ask her to not get all heavy on you?
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  15. #14
    Senior Member Array jca1's Avatar
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    Maybe you could ask her to not get all heavy on you?
    If I gave a crap about what you think about my guns.....it was early this morning and I already flushed it!

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    Distinguished Member Array Rugergirl's Avatar
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    What does she drive?
    Hubby once told me you are what you drive, and I used to drive a Mustang daily, now I drive a 4x4 Bronco, and he says my backside is looking more and more like a bus
    Disclaimer: The posts made by this member are only the members opinion, not a reflection on anyone else, nor the group, and should not be cause for anyone to get their undergarments wedged in an uncomfortable position.

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