Artie the Hit Man...

Artie the Hit Man...

This is a discussion on Artie the Hit Man... within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; There was a man who wanted to off his wife but didn't have the spine to do it himself. One of his bar fly buddies ...

Results 1 to 7 of 7

Thread: Artie the Hit Man...

  1. #1
    Distinguished Member
    Array aznav's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Harrisonburg, VA
    Posts
    1,611

    Artie the Hit Man...

    There was a man who wanted to off his wife but didn't have the spine to do it himself. One of his bar fly buddies heard him grumbling and said that he knew a hit man, "Artie", who was good at his trade. A meeting was arranged.
    After introductions at an undisclosed location Artie stated the charge would be $10,000. The husband exclaimed that he only had $1 to his name to pay him. Artie, cursed him and stormed away. But, moments later came back.

    "I can't believe I'm doing this but I love my trade so stinking much that I'll do it for a buck! I need to know your wife's weekly routine." So they settled on Wednesdays when his wife went shopping weekly at Safeway.

    So Artie is hiding in the parking lot and sees his victim enter the store. He waits till she is in the checkout line then bursts through the door and chokes her right on the spot. The manager sees the commotion and runs over to try and save the woman. Artie then grabs him and strangles him. Now there is such a commotion that the produce manager, closest to the checkout line, jumps on the hit man whereas Artie overpowers him and kills him as well.

    So what were the headlines the next day?




    "Artie chokes three for a dollar at Safeway!" :
    "The heart of the wise inclines to the right, but the heart of the fool to the left." Eccl. 10:2


  2. #2
    VIP Member Array goldshellback's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    OKC; by way of St. Mayberry, GA
    Posts
    4,750

    I 'read' into that one










    Funny
    "Just getting a concealed carry permit means you haven't commited a crime yet. CCP holders commit crimes." Daniel Vice, senior attorney for the Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence, quoted on Fox & Friends, 8 Jul, 2008

    (Sometimes) "a fight avioded is a fight won." ... claude clay

  3. #3
    Distinguished Member Array PastorPack's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Location
    Northern California
    Posts
    1,572
    Good one!
    God is love (1 John 4:8)

  4. #4
    VIP Member Array automatic slim's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    The western edge of The Confederacy
    Posts
    2,198
    Oh lord!
    "First gallant South Carolina nobly made the stand."
    Edge of Darkness

  5. #5
    Member Array mjmoore's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    alabama
    Posts
    321
    good one
    We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police

  6. #6
    VIP Member Array SatCong's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Arizona
    Posts
    3,033
    NRA PATRON LIFE
    BROWN WATER NAVY

  7. #7
    Senior Member Array Katana's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    Clarksville,TN
    Posts
    1,104
    *Ba-dum ching*
    "Stand your ground, don't fire unless fired upon, but if they mean to have a war, let it begin here!" - John Parker April 19th, 1775 Lexington, MA

    Μολών λαβέ!

Sponsored Links

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

Search tags for this page

arty the hit man

Click on a term to search for related topics.