What's in Jack Bauer's bag?

This is a discussion on What's in Jack Bauer's bag? within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Three vials of sodium pentothal Chase's other arm- there is no way that Jack was unaware that Chase broke Kim's heart. Jack always gets his ...

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Thread: What's in Jack Bauer's bag?

  1. #1
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    Talking What's in Jack Bauer's bag?

    • Three vials of sodium pentothal
      Chase's other arm- there is no way that Jack was unaware that Chase broke Kim's heart. Jack always gets his revenge.
      Copy of CTU Distress Codes (2004 Edition)
      Three Cruise missiles
      Four pairs of flexicuffs
      Sun Tzu's The Art of War
      Medieval Iron Maiden
      Pair of pearl-handled Colt revolvers
      Habib Marwan's heart
      Sunglasses
      Cell phone and PDA chargers
      Band-Aids
      Swiss Army knife
      Box of Powerbars
      Two Fruit Punch Gatorades
      Change of underwear
      Schematics of every building in Los Angeles
      Two claymore anti-personal mines
      Driver's License, Helicopter Pilot's License, Airplane Pilot's License, SCUBA certification card, CPR certification card, Frequent Finagler card
      Bamboo shoots (for torture)
      Branding irons (for torture)
      Three pints of type sensitive blood
      iPod
      Kim's senior portrait from high school
      Approximately 17,000 9mm bullets
      Flare gun
      Night vision goggles
      Centrum A-Zinc vitamins
      Copy of Barstool Sports
      Arab-English dictionary, Spanish-English dictionary, Farsi-English dictionary, Russian-English dictionary
      Heroin
      Mass Card for Edgar's wake
      Hit List
      Picture of him and Tony Almeida performing "Love Is a Battlefield" at CTU: Los Angeles' Annual Karaoke Christmas Party
      Business Cards
      Pepper Spray
      AK-47
      Altoids
      Gas Mask
      EpiPen
      Ticket for year long vacation, flight leaves tomorrow at 8:30 AM
    You have to make the shot when fire is smoking, people are screaming, dogs are barking, kids are crying and sirens are coming.
    Randy Cain.

    Ego will kill you. Leave it at home.
    Signed: Me!

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  3. #2
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    Talking Oh Miggy


    Doesn't he also have a neck brace in there that keeps his head from constantly moving to the left and the right every time he talks on the phone.

    Ever notice that?

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    Three Cruise missiles
    Only three Miggy!?
    Chris - P95
    NRA Certified Instructor & NRA Life Member.

    "To own a gun and assume that you are armed
    is like owning a piano and assuming that you are a musician!."


    http://www.rkba-2a.com/ - a portal for 2A links, articles and some videos.

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    I forgot to add I got the list by email.... do you know that Amazon actually sells a bag like Bauer's? Amazing!

    PS: Without the goodies

    And I also found this animation... pretty good

    24 without food
    You have to make the shot when fire is smoking, people are screaming, dogs are barking, kids are crying and sirens are coming.
    Randy Cain.

    Ego will kill you. Leave it at home.
    Signed: Me!

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    Thanks for the laughs today Miggy.

    I thought that Jack Bauer only had in his magic tool bag a:

    - suppressor that attaches to any gun without the benefit of pesky trival things like a threaded barrel,
    - monocular that allowed Jack Bauer to see very clearly at night (without it being an IR device), and
    - PDA with a bazillion megs of memory for all of the downloaded images sent to him by Chloe (who has to be the single most whiney brat in the history of femaledom).
    USAF: Loving Our Obscene Amenities Since 1947

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    Quote Originally Posted by srfl
    Thanks for the laughs today Miggy.

    I thought that Jack Bauer only had in his magic tool bag a:

    - suppressor that attaches to any gun without the benefit of pesky trival things like a threaded barrel,
    Velcro?

    - monocular that allowed Jack Bauer to see very clearly at night (without it being an IR device), and
    It is actually a dispenser of a chemical that augments the light reception at the retina level. The chemical burns like pepper spray, but Jack is not affected by it.

    - PDA with a bazillion megs of memory for all of the downloaded images sent to him by Chloe (who has to be the single most whiney brat in the history of femaledom).
    Yeah, but she can shoot!
    You have to make the shot when fire is smoking, people are screaming, dogs are barking, kids are crying and sirens are coming.
    Randy Cain.

    Ego will kill you. Leave it at home.
    Signed: Me!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Miggy
    It is actually a dispenser of a chemical that augments the light reception at the retina level. The chemical burns like pepper spray, but Jack is not affected by it.
    ...actually, the chemical is affected by Jack.

    Quote Originally Posted by Miggy
    Yeah, but she can shoot!
    ....true.
    Last edited by srfl; April 28th, 2006 at 02:47 AM.
    USAF: Loving Our Obscene Amenities Since 1947

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    24 is the best show ever!!
    Curry

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    Ever notice how he never seems to go to the bathroom?
    "I Don't Want To Socialize With A Pinko Liberal Democrat Commie. Say What You Like About Republicans. We Stick To Our Convictions. Even When We Know We're Dead Wrong." Denny Crane:

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    only talks at 2 volumes also yelling wishper and yelling

  12. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lawrence Keeney
    Ever notice how he never seems to go to the bathroom?
    So you finally understand why he is so mean?
    You have to make the shot when fire is smoking, people are screaming, dogs are barking, kids are crying and sirens are coming.
    Randy Cain.

    Ego will kill you. Leave it at home.
    Signed: Me!

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    Pair of pearl-handled Colt revolvers

    IVORY handled revolvers.......Bauer is NOT that kind of pimp.
    http://www.myspace.com/sgeringer
    SIG SP2009<>XD45 4"<>S&W 638-3<>GLOCK20<>Mossberg Mav88

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