In defense of the The Juriest

In defense of the The Juriest

This is a discussion on In defense of the The Juriest within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; In another thread a lawyer on this forum told me he thought most jurist were like a bunch of old ladies gossiping over the back ...

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Thread: In defense of the The Juriest

  1. #1
    Member Array Steve O's Avatar
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    In defense of the The Juriest

    In another thread a lawyer on this forum told me he thought most jurist were like a bunch of old ladies gossiping over the back yard fence (or some such). Thought it'd be nice cut and paste a different story about jurist from the other side of the fence:


    A defendant was on trial for murder.

    There was strong evidence indicating guilt, but there was no corpse. In the defense's closing statement the lawyer, knowing that his client would probably be convicted,resorted to a trick.

    "Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I have a surprise for you all," the lawyer said as he looked at his watch.

    "Within one minute, the person presumed dead in this case will walk into this courtroom."

    He looked toward the courtroom door. The jurors, somewhat stunned, all looked on eagerly.

    A minute passed.

    Nothing happened.

    Finally the lawyer said, "Actually, I made up the previous statement, but, you all looked on with anticipation. I, therefore, put it to you that you have a reasonable doubt in this case as to whether anyone was killed, and I insist that you return a verdict of not guilty."

    The jury, clearly confused, retired to deliberate, but a few minutes later, they all returned and pronounced a unanimous verdict of guilty.

    "But how?" inquired the lawyer. "You must have had some doubt; I saw all of you stare at the door."

    The jury foreman replied: "Yes, we did all look, but, your client did not......."


  2. #2
    Senior Member Array CowboyColby's Avatar
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    Lol thats a good one.

  3. #3
    Member Array UnklFungus's Avatar
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    That's great!
    “The Constitution is not an instrument for the government to restrain the people, it is an instrument for the people to restrain the government.”

    Patrick Henry
    Quote Originally Posted by UnklFungus
    If it is ok to disarm legal citizens to reduce crime, then doesn't it stand to disband the military to prevent war?

  4. #4
    Distinguished Member Array BigStick's Avatar
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    I wonder if the client knew about the upcomming trick, or if he didn't look because he really had killed the guy? Great story.
    Walk softly ...

  5. #5
    Member Array Steve O's Avatar
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    Not much support for jurors here is there? Could it be that most are to busy freaking out about the law and lawyers and how to keep themselves out of prison that they have no time to think about the rest of the court system and what it does?

    Gun forum = 0

    Perps get = 1

    Now let's all go hire the lawyer that defended someones mothers murderer and got the guy off scott free cause he's the best lawyer to protect your rights and freedoms. Don't worry about the jurist their just a bunch a bimbos.

  6. #6
    Member Array wkientz1's Avatar
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    Nice turnout.
    Bill and Izzie: Proud parents of a soldier.
    I thought of you all day today when I was at the zoo.

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