Got to Love This Dog Joke!

Got to Love This Dog Joke!

This is a discussion on Got to Love This Dog Joke! within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; This is a great joke, I just had to share. If it's been posted before, I'm sorry, but I just couldn't resist! An older, tired-looking ...

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Thread: Got to Love This Dog Joke!

  1. #1
    VIP Member Array JoJoGunn's Avatar
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    Mar 2009
    West Virginia

    Got to Love This Dog Joke!

    This is a great joke, I just had to share. If it's been posted before, I'm sorry, but I just couldn't resist!

    An older, tired-looking dog wandered into my yard. I could tell from
    his collar and well-fed belly that he had a home and was well taken care

    He calmly came over to me, I gave him a few pats on his head; he then
    followed me into my house, slowly walked down the hall, curled up in the
    corner and fell asleep.

    An hour later, he went to the door, and I let him out..

    The next day he was back, greeted me in my yard, walked inside and
    resumed his spot in the hall and again slept for about an hour.This
    continued off and on for several weeks.

    Curious I pinned a note to his collar: 'I would like to find out who the
    owner of this wonderful sweet dog is and ask if you are aware that
    almost every afternoon your dog comes to my house for a nap.'

    The next day he arrived for his nap, with a different note pinned to his
    collar: : "He lives in a house with six children, two under the age of
    three. Can I come with him tomorrow?"
    "A Smith & Wesson always beats 4 aces!"

    The Man Prayer. "Im a man, I can change, if I have to.....I guess!" ~ Red Green

  2. #2
    VIP Member Array Old Chief's Avatar
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    Jun 2006
    Southwest Tennessee
    Some things just work. An afternoon nap is good for the soul.
    When you accept mediocrity you sow the seeds for future failure.
    One should never confuse good fortune with good training.
    Illegitimus Non Carborundum. In God we trust.

  3. #3
    VIP Member Array searcher 45's Avatar
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    Sep 2009
    Very Very Good Thank You!!!!
    I do not love the bright sword for its sharpness,
    nor the arrow for its swiftness,
    nor the warrior for his glory.
    I love only that which they defend.
    -J.R.R. Tolkien

  4. #4
    Senior Member Array Spade115's Avatar
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    Jan 2010
    Heard it befor and LOVE it. Great joke.
    When life gives you lemons, Open a lemonaid buisness.

  5. #5
    Member Array r0rtiz's Avatar
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    Oct 2009
    Fontana, CA
    I have two cildren under 3 years old so I can relate to this poor dog.

  6. #6
    Lead Moderator
    Array rstickle's Avatar
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    Dec 2004
    Laurel, MD
    That was great, thanks for the smile.

    EOD - Initial success or total failure

  7. #7
    Array QKShooter's Avatar
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    Dec 2004
    Moderator Central

  8. #8
    VIP Member Array Eagleks's Avatar
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    May 2008
    Smart Dog. LOL.

  9. #9
    VIP Member Array dukalmighty's Avatar
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    Feb 2008
    That was great,My old lab was bought when my kids were teenagers ,so she never felt the energy of a 3 yr old playing wrestlemania thank god
    "Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country,"
    --Mayor Marion Barry, Washington , DC .

  10. #10
    Senior Member Array Avenger's Avatar
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    May 2009
    nowhere, usa
    That was good. Smart dog!

  11. #11
    Member Array das38spl's Avatar
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    Oct 2009
    central NH
    They say "you can't teach an old dog new tricks"......
    But sometimes.....THEY can teach US some.....!
    Great story......or, rather......"tail"?!

  12. #12
    Member Array Samwolf's Avatar
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    Oct 2009
    South Carolina, First to Secede
    Good One.

    Here's one of my favorite dog jokes.

    A guy is driving around the back woods of Montana and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale ' He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard.

    The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there.

    'You talk?' he asks.

    'Yep,' the Lab replies.

    After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says 'So, what's your story?'

    The Lab looks up and says, 'Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA. In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.'

    'I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running. But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.' 'I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired.'

    The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.

    'Ten dollars,' the guy says.

    'Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?'

    'Because he's a liar. He never did any of that crap.

    "One of the ordinary modes, by which tyrants accomplish their purposes without resistance, is, by disarming the people, and making it an offense to keep arms."

    -- Supreme Court Justice Joseph Story, 1840

  13. #13
    Senior Member Array downrange's Avatar
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    Jan 2007
    levittown PA
    Heard that one too, but forgot it. Love it!
    What's this button do?

  14. #14
    Member Array merischino's Avatar
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    Feb 2010
    Southern Florida
    Gotta love a good dog joke or two! Good stuff!
    People who like this sort of thing will find this the sort of thing they like.
    - Abraham Lincoln

    A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject.
    - Winston Churchill

  15. #15
    cmb is offline
    Senior Member Array cmb's Avatar
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    May 2009
    I have 5 preschoolers at my house, where do you live so I can come over!

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